Tuesday, October 30, 2007

A Reflection of the Times



I sure hope this blog doesn't seem as tired as I feel today. I dislike not blogging, but I dislike blogging about nothing even more. So tonight, I'm just going to split the difference.

There's a whole lot going on in real life right now. I won't bore you with the details, but during the past week, I've done more driving than I usually do in a month.

As I related in my brunch answer, Randy and I had a fun evening on Saturday at a vanilla Halloween party. The after-party, of course, was better still. I really need those sessions sometimes to restore my emotional balance.

I considered recording the evening in the form of a full blown account, but I still haven't finished the birthday story, or a new Spanking 101, or a couple of other projects that I think you'll see eventually. I have no shortage of inspiration or material. It just seems as though every time I sit down to write, I get sleepy and abandon the effort before I get too far.

Please bear with me, dear reader. The current inconvenience shouldn't last too much longer, and hopefully, that means that I will again be able to post more regularly. Until then, I remain grateful for your kind words and friendly clicks!

Monday, October 29, 2007

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Oct 28


Appropriate to the season, this week’s brunch dealt with Halloween celebrations. Here are your thoughts.

Padme: We do have special plans for Halloween. My daughter is hosting the haunted house at her school, so I plan to spend the day helping her with that. I do plan to dress up, but am still trying to decide what to wear. I have many costumes to choose from. :)

We are going to a Halloween party with a big dinner and everyone is dressing up. We went last year and it was a lot of fun. The people's house is huge and they always decorate it all up and play Halloween music. They also have some games for the kids. I can't wait. :)

I hope to get a spanking later in the night when our children are in bed and we have some alone time. There is nothing better than a spanking on Halloween. :)

Dressing up is the part I love best about Halloween. I also love going to the pumpkin patch and carving the pumpkin. :)

Raheretic: Approaching five years ago now, before we bought our condos, we lived in two side by side apartments in an upscale apartment complex. They used to host complex parties every month or so in the complex community house. Of course in October they would have a Halloween party with tenants encouraged to come in costume, etc. We won the costume contest three years in a row.

We would deck ourselves out in BDSM fetish clothing and gear. T and sue with their collars, lead by me on leashes, and me with plenty of paddles, floggers, and whips dangling from my belt. We astonished most of our neighbors. You see, most of the tenants were young (twenty-something), recently graduated, aspiring business executives, mostly single, and generally very pretty. But they were remarkably traditional and conservative (Just what the hell is wrong with these kids today!).

They thought it was kind of funny to see us 50-year old range codgers and codgettes (?) hanging out at their party. I remember once when we joined in one of their conversations and they were amazed that my T had a better grasp of rock group names than they had... But I digress.

T would be dressed as a pussy cat, and would have mittens safety pinned to the back of her costume (a take off on the old "three little kittens, had lost their mittens" nursery rhyme.) She would tell people that she needed to find her mittens to avoid getting spanked. She also would carry a Halloween pumpkin-like candy container filled with red licorice Twizzlers. As each guest would enter the party, she would offer them a Twizzler (very "twisted" licorice candy), telling them, "My Master says I have to offer these to everyone because I am so twisted." Sue would just play the role of the humble slave led about on a leash by her Master.

We got lots of interesting reactions. Many people would tell us how very real our costumes and props seemed to them. DUH! We would tell them that we were not in costume at all, and that the rest of the year, we had come to the parties in costume. This month, we had come as we were... which would cause some of them to go away confused. Some folks would pursue their curiosity enough for us to launch into an impromptu workshop on our D/s polyamorous lifestyle. No one ever offered to have me spank them, dammit. :(

It was fun to fly in the face of these young yuppies' ageist stereotypes and to give them a little first hand experience with some of the trappings and even information about our alternative lifestyle. It is so rare for us to be able to be out about who we are, and our lives, other than in very intentionally constructed Lifestyle events, parties, etc.

We haven't had nearly so much fun on Halloween since.

Jean Marie: Halloween holds a special, special place in my heart, and not just because I'm such a Harry Potter fan. It has to do with knowing my orientation as a spanko for so long growing up, but keeping it secret. It still resonates with me, who presents the image of a proper school teacher to world, when I'm a libidinous, lascivious spank-maniac/sex-fiend underneath my conservative clothes. On this magic night, I like to unmask the hidden, let the monster in my closet out to run wild and free.

That said, because the magical holiday falls in the middle of the week this year, we sadly have no party to attend. I'll hand out candy at the door dressed as Marie Antoinette with hair piled on my head, a corset squeezing my tits up and my ass out, and a floor-length satin dress hiding the fact that I'm otherwise naked underneath. I bet it won't take long for my lover to unwrap my goodies and get us both sticky... Last year I went to a party as Cruella de Ville, with half of my blonde hair dyed black, and my body tightly encased in a skin-tight polka dot dress. It was such a dramatic change from my everyday persona, some acquaintances didn't recognize me. I hooked-up with a young hunk in a Freddie Krueger mask, and made-out in the host's master bedroom on all the guests' coats for a couple hours. The guy wouldn't take my hints that I wanted/needed to be spanked. If he had, I might have lost my head and had unsafe sex with him. As it was, we just kissed and dry-humped and let our hands explore.

I've had some phenomenal times on Halloween. Easily one of the most memorable was when I lived in L.A. and was invited to Hefner's Playboy Mansion for the All-Hallows Eve Bash. I was a struggling actress/model then, so couldn't afford much of a costume. I wore my English equestrian outfit of helmet, boots, tight breeches, and open blouse without benefit of a bra. I was out back by the grotto around midnight, where all kinds of erotic goings-on were transpiring in plain view, when a well-known producer took my riding crop from my grasp and gave my bottom a smart smack. I feigned indignation as I pulled the stretchy pants and lace panties down to inspect the damage. "You left a mark!" I exclaimed. I bent over fully, revealing all my charms, and informed him that I was a very naughty thing, and that just one lick wouldn't suffice. He verified that he could use the thin rod very expertly, followed by a session with his thick one. We were an item for several months after that.

I truly believe that all kinds of spirits are loosed on this special night. I can attest to being possessed on more than one occasion. I hope everyone will be wickedly bold and nakedly honest with who they dress-up as and how they (mis)behave.

Mthc: We go all out for Halloween as we live in a neighborhood of 140 houses. We get around 300 or 400 trick-or-treaters. We have an outdoor fireplace, torches, a real cow skeleton, decorations, and lights. My mom hands out candy.

Here’s David in his costume.



Yeah, I think David has a Halloween spanking on his mind.

Terpsichore: My husband and I have been married for eight years. Our relationship has always included an occasional spank here and there and some light playful spanking during lovemaking. However, it was never more than that. Last month, I expressed to my husband my innermost fantasies of being spanked and he responded with love and acceptance. I am still waiting for that spanking. We have two small children who we love so much and who bring smiles to us each day. On Halloween, we will enjoy taking them trick or treating to a couple of houses and seeing their sweet faces in their costumes. Most likely, my husband and I will not wear costumes, though quite possibly our children will choose costumes for us by giving us cat ears or a firefighter's hat or other such accessories from their dress up box. And who knows, once the children are sleeping in the quiet of the night, maybe my spanking fantasy will come true. Only time will tell...

Dove: It's only just really starting to take off here in Australia and, in fact, the last two years is the only time we have had kiddies turn up at the door to 'trick or treat.' I make sure I have something for them now, but I didn't think of dressing up myself. I will have to think of something, but whether I'll get a spanking for my trouble is anyone's guess.

Mary: Halloween is one holiday that we have yet spent together. It always seems he is out of town. But I can see some ideas from the trick or treat theme. I loved Tom's story of saying they were in costume at all the OTHER parties!! How fun!

Emily: I don’t have any major plans this year. My ex is taking our youngins trick or treating so I may have to come up with something. Get some friends together to go see a spooky movie or go to a haunted house or something. I don’t have any plans to dress up this year. For the past couple of years my coworkers and I have dressed up for work. We did pajama's one year and another it was 60's attire... You know, poodle skirts and such. I have lots of outfits I could wear but definitely not appropriate costumes to wear to work or out trick or treating with the kiddos. LOL

Morningstar: Halloween has lost its appeal for me specifically. Oh, there are costume parties we could attend here in the Great White North. But since most BDSM parties already greatly resemble a Halloween masked ball every weekend, Halloween holds no special thrill…

A few years ago though, Sir and I went to a private BDSM party and I dressed up as an angel, which raised more than a few eyebrows, trust me…

This year, I did find some interesting "Halloween" accessories (so to speak ) for Sir. I presented them to Him on Friday night. He dressed me up in them and took loads of pictures... If anyone is interested, I should be posting pictures of the result on Monday. It’s just a little introduction to Halloween fun in our condo in the Great White North!

Paige: Yup! I always dress up in something naughty! In fact, I dressed up for my hubby yesterday as a sexy cat! He absolutely loved my costume, and I absolutely loved the spanking I got!

Oh, BTW, I have a picture of the costume on my blog!

Hermione: I've put together a semi-kinky costume to wear to work. I'm going as "The Enforcer." Over black slacks and red sweater, I'll wear a sequined devil's tail and horns, plus a spiked leather collar and leather wrist bands. I have a small leather flogger to carry. This is pretty much in keeping with the job I have, and my work persona. At work, I would be perceived as a domme rather than a sub.

While costume shopping I also picked up a red and black feather boa and a serving wench costume of black velvet dress with a red bodice that laces up the front. I'll store these with the rest of my interesting play outfits.

We'll be going out for dinner on Halloween, and who knows what devilment we might get up to after.

LynLass: I went to a Halloween spanking party earlier this month dressed as Elphaba, the Wicked Witch of the West from the musical Wicked. Because I had the witch's hat that said "Wicked" that was purchased at the show, I really expected someone to notice what it said and decide that I needed a spanking because I was "wicked," but nobody did. I did get some very good spankings, just none because I was "wicked!"

Bonnie: Randy and I attended a (vanilla) costume party last night and it was great fun. I dressed as an elf. It was a real hoot. I wore a dark green leotard over lighter green tights. I then wrapped some green material around my hips to create a little skirt. I even found some pointed ears!

Randy, deciding to play off of my idea, donned a Santa suit. Apparently, they’re not at all difficult to rent in October. He made a very silly Santa, but it was good for a lot of laughs. More than once during the proceedings, our lecherous old soul felt the need to grope his trust elfin assistant.

When we returned home, playtime commenced almost immediately. I knew he would adore my costume. In his testosterone-clouded brain, tight spandex plus curved flesh equals spanking time. There was lots of rubbing, plenty of spanking, and a fine after-party celebration. At our house, Santa delivered his gifts a couple of months early!

Dave: I like dressing up as a Ninja for some reason. I’ve seen too many Kung Fu films perhaps. I guess it lets out my inner Bruce Lee.

Thank you all for your spooky spanko contributions! I hope you’ll all stop back next week.

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Sunday, October 28, 2007

MBS Spanko Brunch #93


Spanking enthusiasts can have fun with virtually any holiday, but for many of us, Halloween holds a special place in our hearts. The very idea of dressing up and going out in public in outlandish costumes is the stuff of fantasies. Adding ritual spankings seems, at least to me, like the makings of a perfect evening.

So what about you?

Have you any special plans for Halloween this year? Will you and/or your partner be dressing up? If so, what costumes have you chosen? Do you plan to attend a party or will you enjoy trick or treat at home? Will your Halloween celebration include a spanking in character? As a spanko, what do you like best about Halloween?

If you would like to share your answers to these questions, I invite you to do so by posting a comment below, sending me an e-mail, or posting a response on your own blog. Regardless of the medium you choose, I welcome your scary (or perhaps not-so-scary) Halloween thoughts.

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Story: Reunion


Anyone who follows the Fantasy Friday feature at New Beginnings will recognize this story from that venue. For everyone else, I hope you enjoy this little slice of rekindled romance in small town America (then go check out this week's Friday Fantasy!).

As he approached the old lodge hall, Wes could clearly see the huge banner hanging from the front of the building.

- - - Welcome Jefferson HS Class of 1982 - - -

The parking lot was full of every imaginable make and model of vehicle. Some of his classmates had clearly done well. Others, it appeared, were still struggling to establish themselves.

After finding a vacant parking spot in the back of the lot, Wes took a deep breath and reflected for a moment before joining the party. This would be his first class reunion without Beth. He was technically a free man. Unfortunately, this group was pretty well paired up and had been so for years. Wes might well be odd man out. Regardless, he knew it would be great to reconnect with old friends.

Moments later, Wes found himself walking beneath the giant banner and into a swarm of classmates.

“Wesley, my man!” shouted Biff Jenkins. Biff was practically a legend in town for his basketball prowess. He led the Fighting Eagles to the district finals in his senior year. His wife, cute, petite, and reserved, seemed almost his opposite.

“Hi Wes!” Wes knew that voice immediately. When he spun around, there before him stood Mandy Miller. Although normally outgoing and a capable conversationalist, Wes felt momentarily tongue-tied.

“Oh. Hi, Mandy. How are you?” He felt strangely nervous greeting someone he had once known so well. Because her maiden name started with the same letter as his, they seemed to sit together in many of their classes.

“I’m doing great. Bruce and I split up three years ago and it’s been a rebirth for me.” She looked great, Wes thought. Mandy was no longer the lanky girl in the sparkling majorette uniform. No, time and life had sculpted her into a beautifully mature woman.

“How about you? Is Beth here?”

“No,” Wes related slowly, “We’re divorced now.”

“Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry.” With that, Mandy took Wes’ hand and squeezed it.

“Please don’t be. Like you, I’m building a new life.” Wes recalled that he would have given anything in high school just to hold Mandy’s hand. He gently returned her squeeze.

Just then, the DJ started a favorite Cars song. Wes gestured toward the dance floor in the center of the big hall and asked, “Shall we?” Mandy nodded her agreement.

As they danced through two or three new wave classics, Wes learned that Mandy still lived in town and that her younger daughter was just finishing college. He shared how his dedication to his career had driven a wedge between him and Beth. He had learned from this experience and vowed to be a dedicated partner in his next relationship.

Mandy explained to Wes that her ex-husband was very conventional and wasn’t interested in meeting her needs. She lived with this frustration for years until she learned that he had been unfaithful. The split, when it came, merely formalized what had already happened long before.

Mandy and Wes stuck together for most of the evening. They were even asked once if they were a couple.

“No,” Wes replied, “We’re just really good friends who’ve been apart way too long.” And so they were.

It was enjoyable to walk around to each of the tables and become reacquainted with so many old friends. The turnout was excellent and the stories were remarkably varied. Some classmates had joyous achievements. Others had tragically lost loved ones. Some beamed about their children’s accomplishments. A few had chosen less traditional paths.

With each chance they had to talk, Wes found himself more enchanted with Mandy. She had been beyond his imagination in high school. A mere geek could never compete with a stud football player like Bruce. He was just her study buddy. Yet, she had always been so sweet and so friendly. And now, here she was, holding his hand and shining that lovely smile.

Later, Wes and Mandy shared a slow dance. The song was Sweet Love by the Commodores. Embracing Mandy felt like the fulfillment of a dream that Wes never realized he held. When she snuggled closer, he knew he had to find out whether they could have a future together.

By eleven thirty , the party began to wind down. It would soon be breaking up. How, he wondered, could Wes freeze this moment in time, or better still, allow it to continue. Mandy beat him to it.

“Would you like to stop over at my place for a drink?”

“Yes, I’d love to…”

As he drove across town, Wes could hardly believe his good fortune. He wanted to demonstrate his enthusiasm, but without scaring her off. In the end, he decided to act natural and see what transpired.

Mandy’s house was small, but decorated in a colorful, imaginative fashion that reflected the woman herself. When she offered Wes the promised drink, he opted for water because of the lateness of the hour and his long drive home. He thought he spotted a gleam in her eye when she nonchalantly said, “Oh yeah, right.”

The two talked for the next hour exchanging personal experiences, remembrances, and perspectives. Finally, Mandy fell silent.

“What?” Wes inquired. “Is everything OK?”

“Yes,” she muttered slowly, “I just need to ask you something.”

“Sure, what is it?” They had talked about everything from parenthood to politics. Wes couldn’t imagine what could make her pause like this.

“I hope you don’t think I’m weird…” Mandy drew a long, slow breath as if to muster her courage before starting again. “OK, once, a long time ago, Beth and I were at a club with some girlfriends. We were all really tipsy. Maybe I’m insane, but I distinctly remember Beth telling me that you spanked her.”

Wes wasn’t sure how to respond. “Well, I…”

“She told me that it was absolutely delicious and that she loved it.”

“Well, yes, we did…”

“Ah, so it is true! I have to tell you that from that moment until this one, I’ve envied Beth. I’ve had an interest in spanking since I was in grade school. I even looked up words in the dictionary.”

“So, you’re a spanking enthusiast too?”

“Yes! But Bruce had zero interest in spanking me. I felt totally rejected.”

“So,” Wes observed with a wry smile, “I guess that brings us to tonight.”

“Would you…?”

“It will be a genuine pleasure.”

“OK, that’s great. I need to go and get something.” With that, Mandy zipped upstairs. As she departed, Wes couldn’t help admiring her curved derrière wiggling beneath her skirt. It had been the inspiration for more than one teenage fantasy.

Mandy was almost sprinting when she returned to the living room. She carried a thick wooden paddle.

“I bought this last year at the fraternity/sorority store for the day I finally get my spanking. I’ve even tried spanking myself with it, but it didn’t work very well.

Wes placed his arms around her. He brushed a stray strand of hair away from her eyes. Then he kissed her softly on the lips.

“I want tonight to be an event to remember. I have no desire to beat you black and blue with that paddle. For what you need, my hand will serve nicely.”

Wes set the paddle aside and slid over to the center of the couch.

“I’ve never done this before, Wes.”

“I know. It’ll be fine. I promise.”

“OK, good. Shall I get undressed?”

“No, that won’t be necessary. Just drape yourself across my lap and I’ll lift your skirt.”

“Oh, that’s a good idea…” Mandy positioned herself face down with her torso on Wes’ lap.

“Is this where you dreamed you would be?”

“Oh my, yes. Let’s start.”

“For this first time, I will stop spanking if you ask me to stop. If you don’t ask, I will assume that it’s all right to continue. This will hurt a bit, but I doubt it will be anything you can’t handle.”

“OK.”

Wes lifted the hem of Mandy’s skirt. There, before his eyes was the rounded bottom he had admired so many times – swimming and sunning at the pool in an orange bikini, twirling a baton at football games in her green sequined leotard, or dancing at sock hops in tight fitting blue jeans. Now, clad in lacy aqua panties, it was his to spank.

The first swat was barely more than a tap, but it elicited a shiver of anticipatory joy from Mandy. The second was firmer, but not hard. Wes could tell from the tautness of her bottom that Mandy had been working out. Successive spanks increased in intensity. Wes noted little squeals of happiness escaping from between Mandy’s lips. Soon, he was delivering solid blows to both cheeks. She responded by grinding her hips against his leg.

Wes interpreted this motion as a signal to continue. He pulled her panties down to the middle of her thighs. He grinned when Mandy lifted her pelvis to aid in his unveiling. Again he spanked, but this time, each strike was accompanied by the distinctive sound of flesh impacting against flesh. Mandy’s utterances were closer to moans of passion than cries of pain.

After a few minutes, Wes slowed his pace and began to intersperse rubs with the swats. At first, he caressed her pleasantly reddened bottom. Finding an appreciative reception, his attention moved to her feminine folds. Mandy’s panting grew more urgent until she exclaimed, “I can’t wait any longer. I need you to please, please make love to me.”

And so began a whole new story…

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Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Poll: Putting Away Your Toys


Where do you keep your spanking implements and other sex toys?

In one well secured location
In a few strategically placed stashes
Some in each of several rooms
All over the house
I frequently trip over them!

Monday, October 22, 2007

In with the New: Halloween Edition


It's my pleasure to introduce nine young spanking-oriented blogs. A couple are old friends in new places. One is the partner of a new friend. All of these bloggers have something positive to share. I hope you will enjoy their blogs.

When you visit, I encourage you to leave a message. New bloggers are typically starved for feedback. They don't know whether they are doing things right or even if anyone is reading. Your support can make the difference between a successful blog and an abandoned effort.

Devlin O'Neill's Weblog
Green Roots Down
John Mirra's Blog of Spanking
Lisa's Domestic Discipline Blog
Lovin' Spanks
My Narrow Hands
Serving Him
Spanking Delights
Tales from the Top

(If I've overlooked other great new spanking-oriented blogs, please tell me and I will include them as well)

To these new bloggers, allow me to welcome you to our community. I look forward to watching your blogs grow and thrive.

Here are some suggestions I assembled as a guide to enhancing your blog. While it's certainly not the final word, you may find some useful tips.

My Blogging Smarts
More Blogging Smarts
My Blogging Smarts Again
My Blogging Smarts: Balance

I hope you find the spanko blogging experience as rewarding as I have!

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Sunday, October 21, 2007

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Oct 21


Our topic this week was maintaining a record of spankings, be it paper or electronic. Here are your thoughts.

Sara: I did keep a record, as integrating spanking in our marriage as part of DD, came with many life and relationship changes. I wanted to be able to see it clearly now, and later when I look back, too. A lot of it is too private, but that is also why I started my blog, for the things I can share.

As for photos and/or videos...how horrifying! I am afraid I would be scarred for life!

Carye: We don't keep one, but it could be fun. I think I would like remembering every detail and using it to fuel additional fantasies! Ah, but I'd be afraid of the kidlets finding it! So, I guess for now, I won't :-)

Emmy: My Mentors and I have recently decided that a punishment log would be good for the both of us. It is just a simple spiral bound notebook with three sections. One contains rules we have set between us. The second is the log of rules broken with punishment recorded. The third is for any writing assignments he might decide to give me.

There are many positives to this log. It proves to both of us that my mentorship/training is taking a turn for the better and that I am improving my behavior.

Would I show it to anyone? Probably not. It’s for Don, Ana, and me, and is for our eyes only.

After three months, I only have four infractions, and only one of them was major.

Jean Marie: I keep a journal, and a lot of my reflections get transformed into fictionalized short stories. I have scores of bound composition books dating back to my first time as an adult being taken OTK in college. And, yes, I go back and reread accounts from the past when I have time, such as during the summer. I've spent lots of afternoons at the public pool circumspectly reading marble-covered volumes with the gusset of my bathing suit bottoms drenched with arousal, and no one being any the wiser.

I must say that I'm a little envious of all the girl-next-door types who publish blogs with membership sites where they display nude photos of their freshly spanked derrieres. I'm 35 (and you have no idea of the nerve it took to just write that openly) and when I was an actress/model in L.A. fifteen years ago, I had a world-class ass, and I have always been able to take a hell of a spanking. I could've made a fortune and a name for myself. But back then, I did absolutely no nudity and spanking was very closeted (I usually didn’t reveal it to boyfriends until months into a relationship).

I do respect the women who are my age and older who are open and out-there about their orientation. Sassy who runs Spanking Digest comes to mind.

I'm titillated by the thought of videotaping a sensual escapade or punishment session, but I don't have the cajones. I have had lovers take Polaroid pictures of my bottom after certain milestone events. Color shots of the first time I was paddled with a hairbrush until I bruised, and most of my canings are immortalized in a shoebox on a shelf in my walk-in closet. Many times, boyfriends were just as interested in taking snapshots of my tear-stained face. I think they enjoyed seeing my haughtiness humbled. I've let lovers keep those when we split-up, but never one of my tanned tushy.

In summary, I secretly dream of being a spanking model for the world to see. But in reality, my bared and/or chastised butt is for two pairs of eyes only. It's just as private as the lovemaking that usually follows.

Dove: I have a now private journal for spanking for when I want to remember a particular time or session. I would love photos, but can't get ML enthused about that one. However, they would never be posted on my blog. That's for sure.

D and S: We do take the odd photograph of my spanked bottom. In a rash moment, we decided to make a blog, “My Spanked Cheeks.” But we got cold feet (which makes a change from a warm bottom) after some friends were outted by a newspaper about their nudist activities. We were scared that our spanko lifestyle would also be outted, so we panicked a bit and deleted the blog.

We may return to the blogsphere, but for the time being, I keep a private blog.

littleone: Sliding in quietly on this early Sunday morning, and grabbing a big cup of coffee as I work my way over to a quiet corner...

Yes, we do keep records of our spanking sessions. It’s not always, but most of the time. They are sometimes in the form of photos, but I always make entries in a private journal to Sir. A goodly number of times, I post about it on The Journey. Yes, sometimes I do even post pictures, but only of my ass. I too fear a little bit being outted.

This record is kept because I enjoy going back over the words and photos, usually on an anniversary. I have even (OK, OK, this might be a bit odd for some) made Sir a scrapbook of spanking shots and more private moments for our anniversary this year (number 6).

Moves back to my corner to listen to others and sip my coffee.

LynLass: Sometimes yes and sometimes no. Usually I write if it's something new. I record what was good and what didn't work. Or if it's a bad experience, I process what went wrong in writing. I'm also working on a recall of childhood spankings and fantasies. All are kept in securely locked files on the computer. I'd share those on an individual basis, but not on my blog. They provide background for some posts that I'm working on.

I did a series of pictures one time that showed the process of bruises fading following a spanking and shared them with one person. They may show up on another website without any identifying information.

I suspect my reluctance to share any further than this is the feeling that this is a special part of my life, shared only as I trust someone.

Hermione: I'm afraid I have to say none of the above. We do not do punishment spanking, so there is no need for a record. And while we have been engaged in the lifestyle for many years, my husband and I are just starting to become more open about it with each other, as a result of all I am learning on this and other blogs. That openness means talking to each other about it more and in a natural, relaxed way. We are not ready for photos or videos.

The idea of a journal appeals to me. I would consider keeping one in order to record thoughts and ideas for an attempt at writing fiction. Privacy is always the issue, and I would not feel comfortable sharing it, but I am definitely interested in starting one. If I did manage to write stories, I would definitely share them in some manner, possibly in a blog.

Jim: We did have pictures, stored at Yahoo, at which we would occasionally gaze fondly. However, they were all deleted three weeks ago when Yahoo closed their picture files. The problem we have now is that both our daughters have moved back home (temporarily). As a result, opportunities for play have become very precious and having pictures floating around on the computer would raise anxiety.

If I may go slightly off-topic, can I ask our fellow brunchees if they have ever been particularly inspired – in their personal playing – by a photograph of a spanking?

Lost In Our Eyes: We don't have an official record keeping system, and we honestly haven't been playing long enough to have the urge to reminisce!

We do tend to take pictures, both for our blog and to let the spanked party see what the spanker is seeing.

On a related theme, I've started to keep a log of my offenses for Her review. That might translate into spankings later, but it's the only standardized records we have!

Paige: My hubby's taken my picture after a spanking, and though they're for our own personal use, it's a huge turn on!

David: I have never kept a journal, but I do have pictures of Mthc after our spanking play. I would never share these with anyone but my Mthc

Paul: Mel and I thought about keeping a record of her punishments, and we did for a while. But as the punishment aspect began to fade, so did the record.

As for a photographic record, had digital photography been around, certainly. But not having either the knowledge or desire to develop our own film, it wasn't possible.

Mthc: We have pictures, but they are private. Since I have a home daycare center, we have to be very careful.

Mary: When we first started spanking we would e-mail. I loved to explore the feelings that I experienced and shared every aspect of them with my partner. I originally printed some of the letters and then felt embarrassed by the possibility that they might be found, so I felt content to lock them on the computer. Later, the computer truly crashed and I lost them all. He thought he had them stored in his email account, but discovered that many were automatically deleted due to the time frame. I still feel sad when I think of those letters being lost. I really had wished to save them to review and revisit the feelings of those first spanking experiences. There have been a couple of pictures. It indicates an enormous amount of trust to have those pictures taken. He has sent them to me on occasion to remind me to "be good."

Pandora Sox: We sometimes take pictures. I sometimes write special letters to my Man to recollect our special moments of love and spanking. Sometimes, it is only kept as a shared memory, and other times, I make a post about it on my blog.

Scout: Jim has taken pictures, and although he's shown them to me, he retains possession and they're downloaded to his personal computer. I've sent recounts of diet spankings to Todd and Suzy, and a couple of others here at MBS, but we haven't kept a written record for the most part. I'd be awfully afraid of my kids discovering them on my computer, which is the one they use when they have schoolwork or want to play games. It's intriguing, though.

Dixie: I don't necessarily keep an official log of the spankings that I receive.

In the beginning of my relationship with my Dom, we discussed keeping a log, especially since we are long distance, but it never materialized. However, he says that he keeps a generic list in my folder on his computer.

There are some pictures of my spankings, some I have shown and others are for our eyes only. Some can even be seen at random times on my blog.

Most of the pictures that catalog my spankings show fun spankings. There are a handful of maintenance ones thrown into the mix. I have not taken any pictures after my punishment sessions. I have given thought to the benefits of that though.

I have a small number of short videos of some fun sessions taken with my digital camera. I have shown them to friends, but never in a more public setting and I’m not sure that I ever will. It’s not because they are private, but just because they are mainly so old and dated.

I guess that is the majority of my two cents. ~smiles~

Bonnie: I am a journalist by training and nature. I tend to write things down. A number of years ago, I began creating accounts of particularly noteworthy spankings. Those stories eventually became the foundation of this blog.

There are a lot more spankings than stories, both because of time constraints and because many spankings are simply routine, necessary, and utilitarian. But I still try to capture the best.

Randy has taken photographs for years. They’re fun to review, but I can’t imagine sharing them with anyone, let alone posting them on the blog. I’ve often heard that the camera adds ten pounds. Well, if said camera is pointed at my butt, it adds more like thirty!

Years ago, Randy borrowed a friend’s VHS recorder. As I recall, he wanted to record our daughter’s softball game. He thought it might be fun to memorialize a good, hard spanking as well. When I saw the results, I was horrified. The issue was not the spanking itself, but the unflattering fashion in which I was exposed. It might as well have been a porno flick. Randy said he destroyed the tape, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he still has that video hidden somewhere.

To address Jim’s question, we have definitely been influenced by both photos and stories. We’re always looking for a new spanking approach or scenario. The internet is an endless source for ideas!

Robin: The closest thing to a journal or log would be my blog, and obviously that gets shared :P

DH has taken pictures, but since he feared that someone else might see them, I think he deleted them. I don't mind the pictures, and I kind of wish he'd take some more that I could keep on my computer (it’s totally password protected so NO ONE, not even DH can see anything without my OK). I’m not so comfortable with audio or video. I don't think I would ever share photos, etc. Words only :)

Thanks to everyone who contributed to our discussion! I hope you'll stop back next week.

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MBS Spanko Brunch #92

Welcome to this week's spanko brunch. We have lots of tasty goodies, so grab a plate and help yourself. Our question deals with preserving spanking memories.

Do you keep a record of spankings such as a journal, punishment book, photographs, audio recordings, or videos? If so, would you share these with others or are they too personal? Do you later review these records to recount memorable sessions? If you don't keep a record today, under what circumstances would you consider starting?

I invite you to share your thoughts and experiences with your fellow spanking enthusiasts. You can leave a message below, write me an e-mail, or post a message on your own blog. Whichever medium you choose, I look forward to reading your responses.

Friday, October 19, 2007

Ask Bonnie


Let’s get caught up with Ask Bonnie.

M: I saw ur blog, I am a 55 y/o white male and very much into spanking, I wonder if u might have some pictures of your spanked red bottom to send, I would enjoy seeing the end result of a good spanking, hopefully yours.

Bonnie: Yes, there are pictures. But no, I’d rather not send them to you. They are keepsakes for Randy and me. If you want skin, there are lots of great sites that will give you that.

April: How did you get Blogger to give you drop down menus by category for organizing your posts?

Bonnie: Randy is a computer geek and wrote some code to perform the magic. Please feel free to borrow it if you like.

Hermione: What is your opinion of a vibrating riding crop or dressage whip? Does the vibrating feature add anything to a spanking? Or is it intended for some other purpose?

Bonnie: We don’t have a vibrating crop. In fact, it wouldn’t have occurred to me to buy such a thing. Maybe someone will write and tell me I’m wrong, but I can’t imagine how it would add anything to a spanking.

On the other hand, were such a vibrating implement rubbed against certain parts of the anatomy, the result would probably be quite pleasurable. I’m not certain what advantage that form factor would provide compared to a more conventional vibrator, but it might be worth a try.

Hermione: How do you suggest a spanking couple go about getting started in role playing?

Bonnie: I think that you should start by talking. What roles intrigue you? Which would you each like to explore? Hopefully, you will have plenty of time to try a variety of different ideas. Refine the ones you both like. Drop the ones you don’t. Take turns selecting a fantasy. Role play can be as simple as one word or as elaborate as your imaginations can conceive.

As with many aspects of romance, I think it’s important to lets things progress at their own rate and in their own direction. You may find that you like a given scenario better than you thought you would. By all means, work together and communicate throughout. With time, experimentation, and patience, I believe you’ll find both excitement and enjoyment.

Hermione: I sometimes wear a thong before or during a spanking, and while we are both happy with the back view, I would like to find one that provides a little more coverage in front for my mature curves. Can you suggest a particular brand or an online source?

Bonnie: There’s definitely a market out there for whichever company chooses to pursue it. I have some moderate coverage thongs from Maidenform, but I don’t think they are available any longer. They are similar to these. The rest of my thong collection is the more conventional low rise style. They are from VS and Jockey for Her (silk is sexy and nylon is practical, but cotton is oh so comfortable!).

If you find a brand and style you really like, please let me know and I will share your discovery with everyone.

Dana: I could swear I have seen a picture and description in one of the discussions of a hairbrush with an (angled) offset handle. Do you know of such an item?

Bonnie: I know it very, very well. We have two and they are quite effective (rubbing bottom). Hermione tells me that this very handy spanking brush can be obtained at The Pottery Barn for the modest sum of nine dollars.

Don: YOU NEED A GOOD SPANKING DON'T YOU?

Bonnie: You need to find the Caps Lock key, don’t you?

J: I'm on my second marriage, but it's my husband's first. He's spanked me a few times during sex, but it doesn't really do anything for me. I told him so and he respects that, but now he's asking if I'll do it to him instead. What thoughts do you have about female-on-male spanking? It sounds like you never spank your husband. How would it change the dynamics to have the female giving instead of receiving? Should I try it? If so, how would I go about it? Or should I just let him get his kicks by spanking me, even thought it's not really my thing?

Bonnie: Randy and I don’t engage in F/M spanking because it holds no appeal for us. But please don’t let that dissuade you. I think any activity that is fulfilling for both partners is worth pursuing (assuming appropriate safety and consent, of course). I have no experience with F/M spanking, but fortunately, I know someone who does. Mike has lots of interesting and useful articles and I’m sure he would be happy to answer your questions.

Jeanette: I am new to spankings (my first being given on July 5th) and feel like I still have a lot to learn. I would love to hear more about how to process the pain into pleasure, or how to move past the pain of my spankings. I still find that I get angry when spanked even though I am a willing participant. HELP!

I have had as close to a "good" experience as possible so far, by being under the influence and then really concentrating on my breathing, thinking to myself to just keep breathing and try to relax. I seemed to move past the threshold and he actually stopped when I could have kept going.

Bonnie: Some spanking enthusiasts like the pain. Others go for the exhilaration. For others, it’s a feeling of connectedness that brings them back again and again. Still others get off on the feeling of submission. For many, it’s pure foreplay. As you see, there can be quite a few reasons why spanking appeals to those who practice it.

In your case, it sounds as though you have yet to find any appeal. It’s entirely possible that spanking is simply not your thing. If that is the case, it’s unlikely that any amount of practice or research will change you. If you do find some part of the experience to your liking, then you and your partner may want to arrange your spankings to maximize that element.

By the way, if by “under the influence,” you mean intoxicated, I must urge caution. If you as the spankee are not in full command of your senses, you may be unable to alert your partner to a serious injury before it occurs. I don’t mean to preach, but please be careful.

Hermione: Are you planning on introducing any of the other new topics or features that you had us vote on? I'd like to see implement shopping tips, and possibly a rerun of the feature where you asked readers to send in pictures of their favourite implements.

Interviews would be great too. And as I see from other blogs, the comments are used as a way for readers to chat with each other, so that could be fun.

I wonder how non-spanking content would work. I'm sure you'd handle it well, and there are lots of us, myself included, who would like to get to know you a bit better. Yes, we do all have other interests besides TTWD. I think this is the place where many bloggers do manage to fall short, and start talking about what they had for breakfast.

Bonnie: Perhaps I could combine the first two ideas and have readers submit implement stories and pictures, along with how they acquired said implements. In any case, we will definitely have more implement stories.

If I do interviews, they will have to be different than what most bloggers do. In terms of the people being interviewed and the topics discussed, I would try to make it unique.

As for the off-topic content, I wasn’t all that serious in proposing it. I added it to the poll to see if anyone would vote for it. Few did. There are a thousand vanilla bloggers who can tell better life stories. I’m at my best as a blogger when I stay on message, and around here, spanking remains the message!

Katerina: I have only recently started to explore a spanking lifestyle. Consequently, I was wondering if you had some advice to share as you seem to have quite a bit of experience in this area. I am looking to get an implement that provides maximum sting, but makes little noise and doesn't leave many marks. I guess I should also mention that this will be used for self discipline at the moment.

Bonnie: That’s the Holy Grail of spankos, isn’t it? There are lots of great implements, but few excel in all three areas. The closest thing I can think of would be a Loopy Johnny. It’s definitely stingy and quiet. To minimize the marks, you might try applying it over pants or a skirt.

Please let us know how your experiments work out.

Erik: What's your policy regarding links? Do you list absolutely every spanking blog you can find? Or do you list only those sites you personally like? Or only those that agree to link back to you?

Bonnie: My policy for links has evolved over time. Originally, I was stingy with links aiming to refer my readers to only the very best blogs. Eventually, I decided this was unfair to smaller and newer blogs who needed the visitors a whole lot more than the big guys. So I broadened the list. In time, I came to realize that many readers used my blogroll as their guide to spanking blogs. So, as a public service, I expanded the list again. It's a lot of work to manage, but people tell me they really like it.

I try to include all spanking-related blogs, except those that are (a) primarily commercial, (b) offensive (based upon my definition), (c) spam blogs, (d) lacking meaningful content, or (e) depicting the spanking of children or any non-consenting person.

I generally delete links to blogs that have been dormant for two months or immediately if they go black.

Bob: Do you shave or wax your pelvic zone?

Bonnie: Neither, but I do crop.

Thank you to everyone who submitted questions. If you would like to participate in Ask Bonnie, send me your question via e-mail.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

It's Just a Matter of Attitude

Monday, October 15, 2007

LOL: The Final Tally


I hope everyone had fun with LOL day on Friday. I know I really enjoyed meeting new friends and getting reacquainted with old ones. Spankos are the best!

We had 83 fabulous blogs participating and 1444 total messages. Hooray for bloggers and lurkers alike!

I guess we'll have to do this again in 2008...


PS - Please be sure to stop by Cassie's Space and wish our dear friend Paul a very happy birthday!

Sunday, October 14, 2007

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Oct 14


Our topic this week was spanking rooms, both those we use today and those we'd love to own. Here are your thoughts.

Todd and Suzy: Our favorite room is the bedroom, which is a good thing since it's close to the only room we ever use for spanking. In any other room, privacy becomes a real issue.

The bed has to be our favorite piece of spanking furniture. It's extremely versatile, allowing several different positions. It's also comfortable, and convenient for the fun we like to have after the spanking is over.

We also have a large chair on our bedroom. We often use that for more playful type spankings.

An ideal spanking room for us would be TOTALLY private, first and foremost. It would have lots of different furniture options (school desk, spanking bench, etc). It would also be in Maui!

Marcus and Deborah:
  • Bathroom: Hairbrush and /or Bath brush
  • Bedroom: Belt, Cane, Hairbrush, Paddle, and /or Switch
  • Kitchen: Metal Spatula and /or Wooden Spoon
  • Living room: Belt, Birch, Cane, Hairbrush, Paddle, and /or Switch
  • Office: Cane, Hairbrush, Paddle, and /or Ruler
  • Favorite Room: No favorite, we like them all
Deborah and I like all the implements in all the locations. However, there are times when implements have a greater impact based on the location and spanking type. For this reason, we select a certain implement to heighten pleasure. For instance, we use the bath brush and /or hairbrush for bathroom spankings on a wet, bare bottom. While in the bedroom, we like to use pillows with a belt, cane, and /or paddle. When it comes to the kitchen, the metal spatula and /or wooden spoon comes in handy, especially when she is cooking and gives a sassy reply about what is cooking. In that event, it is her bottom!

Living room spankings tend to be with the belt, birch, cane, hairbrush, paddle, and /or switch. Any number of them or even all of them can and will be used. The couch gives wonderful possibilities for a sound spanking whether OTK or leaning over the back of it. I have already been notified that should I come through the door with an outrageous attitude that I will be receiving the appropriate adjustment, couch or no couch. It might just be hands against the wall, pants and undies down, and bottom out for the blistering of my life!

Lastly, the office is usually used for punishment spankings or secretary spankings. Deborah loves being my secretary, and sometimes she simply requires a spanking for getting behind in her work. When she gets behind in her work, I get a behind to work on. Typically, office spankings are performed with the cane, hairbrush, paddle, and /or ruler. No matter where the spankings are or which type, spankings have a special place in our lives. We simply couldn't imagine our lives without them!

Natty: I live in a studio apartment, so at this time, we don't have a lot of choice. The bed is pretty much the focal point of all our spankings (though we'll probably be getting a sofa/futon soon and I can imagine it'll get lots o' spanking use).

I've always dreamed of having a writing studio/office in a large garden shed (saw it once in a Mary Englebreit magazine). So, I could always be threatened with being taking out to the shed. Inside, it would have a large desk, a smaller student desk, a chalkboard, and probably a sofa/futon of some sort. And, of course, there would be a peach tree and a birch tree just outside the shed. You know, along with the flower-lined window sills... ;-)

lessa{D}: We have a room in the souterrain which we use mostly as our playroom. It has a fysiotherapy massage table which was altered by DragonM to add extra eyes to tie me down. I do love that room, but also the bedroom upstairs that we changed into my libary. It has a real big couch were I can be over his lap. grinnnn...

Those implements can be taken everywhere, which is a good thing since we visit play parties a few times a year. A close friend of ours has a real play dungeon and that I absolutely adore...

My favorite spanking implement would be either his hand or the flogger... I can't really choose...

Paul: The bedroom has to be my favourite and the bed because it's big and there is very little that can't be done on or in it. The bedroom was always for fun and erotic spankings, with hand, belt, strap, tawse, cane and switch. Mel would be spanked in any room in the house if she bratted or teased. The bathroom was always good because she was usually wet and the sting factor went up. The office was used for punishments, and schoolgirl teacher scenes, which were Mel's favourites.

Any place is good for spanking if you have privacy and the desire. Our motto was the couple that spanks together, stays together.

Jean Marie: In past relationships, I've been spanked mostly in the bedroom. This is due to how aroused we get, and how easy it is to segue to love-making right after (or during) spanking.

I've consciously tried to mix it up while living with K, aided by the fact that he lives in a marvelous big house. I need only misbehave and shoot my lover a look, and he's pulling my clothing off, and "Viola!" we've christened another room. Some past playtimes include:
  • Being punished and then taken from behind bent over a rumbling clothes-dryer in the utility room
  • Being bent over his work bench in the garage and whipped with an electrical cord
  • Being spanked while I cooked his breakfast, which I ate while he sated another appetite on the breakfast-nook table
I'd have to say that I love it best outdoors in the fenced-in backyard. It's super sexy being bared whether in sunlight or star-shine, whether up-ended over the patio furniture, roasted over the unused grill, or tied to a tree and switched...

I'd love to redecorate the game room as a full-on dungeon. The reinforced chandelier would hold my weight if he wanted to tie me to it on tip-toes. I would place a spanking bench in the center of the room and hang all of our implements on the walls. I’d want to be able to photograph and video tape our sessions, so tripods would be set up. In one corner would be a stall, for when I dress up as a pony-girl and offer my haunches to the dressage whip. In another, a schoolroom would be set up for when the cheerleader needs the ruler or the bad girl needs the cane. But K is a businessman who entertains clients in our home, and that would be a bit too provocative. But a girl can dream.

David: I would have to say the bedroom on the bed. The ping pong paddle is Mthc's favorite, but she is starting to like the flogger as well.

Sarah: I am flat sharing for now, so I need to take opportunity while alone. Since I'd have difficulty explaining myself were I caught with a belt, bath brush, or paddle in the living room, I always play in my bedroom. After much experimenting, I've concluded that these three objects are best when playing alone. Unfortunately, I have no partner at the moment. I usually lie on the bed, but sometimes stand up for the paddle.

I would love to have a partner and use a remote cottage, with access to a low fence. My absolute favorite "scene" is getting the belt while bent over a fence.

Mthc: The room most used is the bedroom. This morning already I have found myself across his knee on the edge of the bed taking some of Paul's birthday spanking.

David will use any room in the house. In the kitchen, it's nothing to have to bend over when he gets home from work and feel the spatula. In the sun/computer room, he has a paddle as well as a fly swatter, ruler, and bungee cord. In the living room, we have a recliner/rocker and a sofa. He uses his hand, a hair brush, a backscratcher, or whatever else is available.

We even like the back yard if he can get away with it!

Luna: I posted my response over on my blog.

Paige: My hubby spanks me all over the house! But I'd have to say our favorite room is probably the bedroom, mainly because it's so easy to move into making love!

Naughty Girl: I always have to report to the basement for my spankings. I am always told in a stern voice. "You will report downstairs later this evening (or in ten minutes, or whatever) so that we may discuss your behavior." This means my bare bottom shall soon be paying DEARLY!

It is typically the cane! But sometimes, if I have been really bad, it is the leather paddle, wooden paddle, and then the cane! Fortunately, I am permitted to provide oral pleasure between each implement, which provides my bottom some VERY blessed cooling off time.

Erik: Personally, I like to use a straight-backed chair in the dining room, but my wife prefers the bedroom.

Mary: The home locations would include ANY WHERE I have been over his lap whilst he is seated on the chair or couch. I have bent over holding my ankles in the middle of the room. I have been told wait bent over the arm of the couch, and in the bedroom I have bent over the bed, or lying over pillows on the bed, or over his lap on the bed. My bathroom lacks swinging room, but we have enjoyed a couple of large hotel bathrooms with glee. I didn’t know that the swing of a soft whip could not only stink a wet bottom, but serve to dry me off after a shower. That scene was one of my favorites. I had been lingering in the shower, and he came to check on me - well my lingering was actually due to some distracting thoughts that led to masturbation. He pulled me out of the shower and started scolding and spanking, It was cold at first, but I soon was dry from the fanning effect of each swing. The mirror in the bathroom added to the sensuality of the experience as I could see him spanking me. He is so good at being stern. Normally his facial expressions are so kind, that when he gets that stern look on his face my stomach twists and butterflies flutter.
My all time favorite overall would have to be a tie, I love being on the couch over his lap with the hand or small rubber paddle. The contact with him is so reassuring that I don't often mind that I am being spanked. (I will often end up spanked longer because I don't want to get up and go to the corner when instructed. - He eventually convinces me that I do want to leave his lab with some harder spanks, but I love it there on his lap. My other favorite is in the bedroom, lying with my bottom elevated on pillows, with he using the belt. (one particular belt that of his is just right.) The edges on the belt are softened from wear, and the weight of the belt is heavy enough to feel the impact as well as the sting. He likes it too, because with some experimentation we have discovered that even used full force, it is safe to use. So when I am belted in the above position I can be still enough that he can swing with gusto and not be concerned with me moving out of place or with causing any harm.

PS we also like hotel desks for secretary scenes.

Jeana: My favorite place to be spanked is in our bedroom with Will sitting with his back up against the head board and me laying across his lap. I am not a huge fan of being turned over random objects and I much prefer being close to him, like over his lap. I also don't like to feel like I am going to fall. (We have tried him sitting in a chair me OTK and all I could think about was balance and not falling, plus it is really not that comfortable.) The couch is ok too but in our bed is by far the favorite for both of us. I'm sure we will try some other things eventually, but this is all still a little new to both of us though.

Hermione: My ideal spanking room would be full of light, with a large mullioned window, curtainless so that anyone looking in could observe the activities. The woodwork and wainscotting are painted white, and the upper walls are papered with a tasteful maroon pattern. On one wall are racks where canes, crops, straps, belts and other large implements hang, arranged by type and length. A white cabinet with glass doors holds the smaller paddles, hairbrushes and rulers. There are also hooks to hold clothing as it is removed.

There is a window seat, well padded, for spanking. The central feature is a chaise lounge of sufficient length to permit comfortable OTK and the padded end is just the right height for bending over. There is also a padded spanking bench where one could stand and bend over, then be fastened with leather restraints. A second bench of lesser height is available to support a victim in a kneeling position.

Arranged here and there are small kneeling pads upholstered in the same pattern as the chaise and padded benches, for the spankee's comfort.

Morningstar: I love the topic and I wrote a post on my blog.

Bethie: We tend to go into the bedroom for long spankings that we know are going to end in lovemaking, but pretty much every room in the house is within the spank-zone. (Heck, even the car and the great outdoors aren't out of the question, but that's another story).

When we're not in the bedroom, I get tossed over his knee, over the couch arms, or just bent over for a spanking any place the feeling hits us. We don't have any particular area or implements for different types of spankings. Spankings just happen around here.

As for an ideal spanking room, my imagination runs wild on this one! It'd have a couple of spanking benches (one comfy, one more utilitarian), a desk, a couch in front of a big entertainment center, a big storage place for toys, some rings bolted into walls, a hook or two, and a big bed. Yum!

Abby: Like many others, it sounds like, we use the bedroom for the most part. Part of the fun is that he leads me in there and I think we're going to do one thing, but then it turns out that part is coming much, much later! I love how one minute we're kissing and the next he's somehow turned me around and I'm bent over the mattress.

We also have a room we call the library. Although I moved all but one of the bookcases to the living room, there is also my desk and an antique school bench that we bought specifically for this purpose. It's where we keep most of our implements as well. This room is for harder punishments, or sometimes just to make me think I'm going to be severely punished.

I'd love to have a little building outside that is split into two rooms, front and back. The front is a schoolhouse, complete with student and teacher desks, hooks on the walls for canes and straps and paddles, and a spanking horse. (One of the first spanking clips I saw had a classroom with a horse and I've never gotten over the image.) The back room would be a barn, with bales of hay and possibly something with a saddle over it, so I could go over the saddle. It would be my little English/Western Spanking House!

Bonnie: One of the real joys of being empty-nesters is the ability to move our fun to any part of the house that we choose. We have done precisely that. Most rooms now have some sort of implement on hand, just in case.

Our main toy collection is stored in our bedroom and that’s where the majority of our spankings take place. However, there are plenty of cooking implements in the kitchen, brushes in the bathroom, canes and straps in the basement, and a certain notorious wooden wall hanging in our living room. We even have matching brushes in our respective glove boxes. So, as you see, location is no barrier.

For my ideal spanking room, I would set it up with acoustic baffles like a recording studio. I’d love to be able to yell, whack, and laugh to our hearts content. The carpeting would be downy soft and heavily padded so time spent kneeling wouldn’t kill my knees. I’ve always dreamed of a spanking bench to which I could be bound. There should be a small lavatory adjacent because darn if I don’t have to pee as soon as the action starts. I like the idea of toys hanging up all over the walls. Finally, there would have to be a bed to accommodate all that quite naturally transpires after the spanking is concluded. Such fun could be had!

Anon VII - A mirrored wall often comes in handy, especially for paddlings (which I do) and canings (which I don't). I must admit to a bit of selfishness in saying that the spanker gets the most benefit from getting to observe breasts and facial reactions (both anticipatory and _post facto_) as well as the shoulders, the hair down the back, and the ... well, you know! The recipient needs to understand, of course, that if she chooses to look upward rather than down at the floor (better, since it tips the bottom up), she absolutely must not flinch when her partner swings. If the urge to flinch is too strong, the spanker should have the lady hold her ankles, and then swing with some restraint. That position won't stop a major evasive move, but it tends to stop involuntary twitches.

As to the room, my preference would be one in late nineteenth-century decor: judge's paneling on the walls, arched windows, dark brocade upholstery, etc., perhaps even lamps burning scented oil, replicating a time and place so much in keeping with the activity and creating an atmosphere that is romantic with a measure of formality, if not authority.

Thank you to everyone who added their insight to our discussion. I hope to see you all back here next week when next we sit down (oh so gingerly) for another spanko brunch.

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MBS Spanko Brunch #91


I'd like to extend my gratitude to everyone who helped to make our Love Our Lurkers day a tremendous success. The more time I spend surrounded by the members of this community, the more impressed I am by their generosity, creativity, and compassion.

But enough of that, it's time again for our weekly spanko brunch. This is an event where we gather to discuss a topic related to our favorite pastime. This week, we'll consider location, location, location.

Have you a favorite room in your home or a favorite piece of furniture where spankings most often occur? Does the location ever depend upon the purpose of the spanking? Do the implements or rituals change when spankings are performed in different rooms? If you could construct your ideal spanking room, how might it look?

I invite you to share your thoughts with our other brunchers. You can leave a message below, write me an e-mail, or post a message on your own blog. Whichever medium you choose, I thank you in advance for your participation.

Friday, October 12, 2007

Love Our Lurkers Day


My statistics tell me that there are thousands of readers of this blog who have never left a comment. If this describes you, today is your day.

Dozens of spanking-oriented blogs are dedicating this day to their silent supporters. It's our second annual Love Our Lurkers day. And we do love you. While we may not see your face or read your words, we know you're out there. Even in silence, your return visits provide a gentle affirmation.

I would like to invite you to leave a comment below. It can be as long or short as you choose. You can use a fake name or no name at all. What's important is that you poke your head up just far enough that we might see you.

If you feel chatty, please feel free to tell me how I might make this blog more interesting, more useful, more attractive, more spanky, or more fun. I'm always in the market for great new ideas. If a simple hello is enough for you, I'll welcome that as well.

In any case, I look forward to meeting you!

Here's a running list of other great blogs that are participating in today's festivities:

The Cherry Red Report
My Spanked Cheeks
Niki Flynn's Not Blog
Erik's OTK Blog
Babblings, Blatherings, and Blusters
Journey to the Darkside
Pink Bottomed Girls
Creative Spanko Wench
Finding Sara
Southern Angel
Nothing Random
BB's Spanking Adventures
From My Other Side: Where Anything Goes
Jujubees Journal
Stiletto Diaries
New Beginnings
Joannie Writes About...
Sublime Submission
Bare Bottom Spanking Blog
Ted's Excellent Adventures
The Switching Hour
Cassie's Space
A Day in the Life
Spank Statement
Natty's Spanking Blog
American Spanking Society
Confessions of an English Gentleman
The Renegade Goddess
The Heron Clan
Dove's Surrender
Spanking Blogg
Spanking Bethie
Snow White
AngelBrat
Luna's Journey
Under His Hand
Chross' Guide to the Spanking Internet
Radha Sutra
Amber Pixie Wells
Spankful Delight
A Little Less Talk... A Lot More Spanking
Sally Spanko
Strange Imagination
This Girl's Weblog
All Things Spanking
Tiny Miranda
Green Roots Down
Hunter's April Star
Spanky Loves Kallisto
Reformations
Spanked Hubby
The Inner Working of Dixie
The 13th Floor
Spanked Hortic
The Punishment Book
El Tercer Ojo
Becoming Adam's Angel
Our Kinky Blog
Erica Scott's Blog
Robin's Red Bottom
Life in Motion
Chloe Elise's Spanking Adventures
Pyjama Spanking
MaggieDear
The Wonderful World of Kate James
Kitten's Pawprints in Slavery
Bailey's Blog
Through Iris Eyes
Tulsa Moda
The Masochistic Coquette
Adele Haze's "Spanking Model Speaks"
The Spanking Writers
On My Own
The Little Red Schoolhouse
Devlin O'Neill's Weblog
Paradise Tied Up
The Spanking Spot
The Journey
A New Submissive's Journey
Fantastic Spanking
Emily's Misguided Adventures
Taught a Lesson

There were several spanko bloggers for whom I couldn't find an e-mail address. If you are among them, please feel free to join us by creating your own Love Our Lurkers post!

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

A Tuesday Night Rant


When I began MBS, I vowed that this blog would be a positive place and not a soapbox for whining and complaining. For the most part, I’ve kept that promise. Today, however, is the day I drive off into the weeds. What follows is a bit of a rant. If you’d rather skip all that, well, I suppose I can’t blame you. There’s plenty of good stuff to read elsewhere on the blog.

One of the parts of being a blogger I most enjoy is discovering new spanko bloggers and introducing them to the larger community. There are many great blogs that need and deserve our support and I’m delighted to be able to help them get started.

In my quest to sniff out interesting new blogs, I occasionally come across one whose approach and sensibilities are so different from my own that I choose not to recommend it. That’s fine. I don’t expect that everyone’s kink will be exactly like mine. They have every right to live their lives and promote their lifestyles in any way they choose. I make no judgments beyond, “I don’t think that’s for me.”

A couple of weeks ago, I encountered a web site that really upset me (if you’re reading this and you think I’m talking about you, I’m not, OK?). The premise was that women, all women, are fundamentally inferior and require a man to guide them through life. This guidance, we are told, should take the form of severe physical punishments. Without the active and ongoing intervention of a smarter, more aware male leader, these poor hormonally-afflicted women would undoubtedly find ruin and probably drag most of civilization down with them.

This site offended me at several levels. First, these assumptions are not true and not fair. While I’m sure you can point to individual women who shirk their responsibilities, lots of men are just as guilty. Yet, there’s no talk of punishing them. On the flip side, millions of women carry heavy burdens in life and distinguish themselves by overcoming obstacles and supporting their families. If that’s inferiority, we’re going to have to redefine the word.

In my view, men and women are not identical (hallelujah for that), but our complementary differences make us equivalent. Each gender has skills, insights, and qualities that are of benefit to the other. We are each stronger when we strive together.

Secondly, I see precious little discussion of consent. When one partner feels entitled to strike the other, especially when she is made to feel inferior and deserving of violence, we’ve crossed the line into abuse. This, for me, is the ultimate squick.

Finally, this sort of presentation reflects poorly upon all decent, caring people who happen to enjoy a little kink. An outsider reading this particular site might well assume it speaks for all of us. That is clearly not the case.

My concept of submission requires that I stand on the same level as my husband. This allows me the freedom and the control necessary to submit voluntarily. If I felt that I was below him to begin, lowering myself further would have no real significance. Free choice and the power to exercise it make all the difference. Nothing is taken from me. I yield my control willingly and therein lies the very core of my desire.

I acknowledge that other people make different choices, and I absolutely respect those choices so long as they are informed and in no way coerced. I also acknowledge that people should be free to speak as their hearts direct them. Yet, at the same time, I feel an obligation to raise my own voice when issues such as safety and consent arise.

Let me say to you, dear reader, as simply and as plainly as I can: We women are not helpless, hopeless, nor clueless. Please look around you and see the obvious truth of my words. We deserve far better than abuse, humiliation, and mistreatment. We may be smaller, but we are not less. We can and do survive on our own when life demands it. We partner with men, not because we must, but because we want to do so. In that free choice rests the wonderful transforming power of love.

I'm female by birth, but submissive by choice.