Saturday, March 23, 2019

Keyword Chaos Version 2019-2

Here are more search terms that people used to find this blog:
  • daily reminder spanking stories – I don’t need a story to remind me

  • Did you ever rub the cane marks on afriends bum – Nope, just my own

  • Different position of spanking picture – Rotate it 90 degrees

  • different spanking wives positions – How many wives are there?

  • Discussions on recreational spanking – Download the podcast

  • diy spanking machine – From Popular Mechanics: The Spanko Edition

  • do big girls get spanked harder because their butts are larger? – Probably

  • Dr punish curvy woman by spank barebottom nude and enema – No wonder Doc is always behind schedule

  • embarrassing spanking punishments – Must I wear the clown nose?

  • embarrassing spanking stories – It was a dark and stormy night...

  • embarrassing stuck spank – There was this time when Frank mistook Elmer’s glue for moisturizing lotion

  • Embarrassing thing about spanking – Just one?

  • embarrassing thong slip forum – So you tucked your slip into your thong?

  • erotic spanking positions – That could be any of them if you set the mood

  • ettiquette soanking – Lowsee speling

  • Famous spankees – We love our spanko celebrities

  • fantasy, witnessed red spanked ass cornertime display – This week at the Spanking Museum

  • spanks tumblr – Swat ‘em again, bad Tumblr!

  • favourite spanking podition – I think podition is a new word that describes that facial expression that combines pout with pain

  • female athletes spanked – Cheerleaders shouldn’t have all the fun

  • female firefighters bottoms spanked for fule breaking – I looked up “fule” and it’s an archaic spelling of “fool”

  • females embarrassed by being spanked nude stories – Is it less embarrassing to write about clothed spankees?

  • first adult spanking – Good luck!

  • Forum spanking Princess Kelley – Bow in the presence of royalty

  • fun with recreational spanking – Let’s install the trapeze over here

  • get those pants and underwear for your spanking with a wire hanger – So we’re putting on clothes?

  • getting spanked for stress relief – Yes, please

  • gidget gets spanked – I recall watching that episode as a kid and secretly wishing that it could be me

  • girl spanked in embarrassing underwear art – Her panties had pictures of dancing ferrets wearing lederhosen

  • girls paddled bare bottom in the barn woodshed old fashion licking – If you have a woodshed inside your barn, you are officially hard core

  • girls spanking rituals – My favorite is paddling the bridesmaids

  • good girls sometimes need bare bottom spankings – Yes, we definitely do

  • good positions for self spanking – You could stand or bend over furniture

  • good throne chair for spanking – A throne has arms and is no good for OTK

  • guess memories being spanked at someones else birthday party – Guess again

  • Hands on the wall bubble butt spanking – Dirty hand prints earned Doris another spanking

  • hoh blowj after spankig – It’s good to be the head of household

  • how hard should a stress releif spanking be – Hard enough to make a difference

  • how long does it take after an ass spanking willingly does color return to normal – Depends upon the spanking and the spankee

  • How to be spankable – Ask for it

  • how to get my husband to spank me – Ask for it

  • How to have a schoolgirl bent over, spanking on the edge of a bed and have sex with me her stepdad – Find a consenting adult to explore your fantasies

  • How to make a spanking implement – Pick up a flat household item and give it a whack

  • how to spank your wife – Ask her what she likes

  • I just need a good hard long otk spanking story – 800 pages at least

  • I love to be spanked on bare ass plse spank my big booty – Sounds like a fine proposition

  • i need a spanking – I hope you find one

  • i spank my wife – Congratulations

  • illustrated domestic discipline – Can’t wait for the swimsuit edition

  • im an adult and i get my bare but spanked almost everyday – Good for you

  • im going roadt you bottom spsnking storeis – It must be hard to type with your wanger

  • irish farm girl gets a spanking – Begorra!

  • is it embarrassing for girls to get spanked – Depends upon the situation and the girl

  • is it ever ok to spank yourself bare bottom to get rid of guilt – Sure if that works for you

  • jerry springer spanking episode paddling – I actually googled this, don’t bother

  • know your spanking implements – Wouldn’t want to mistake a belt for a paddle

  • Lady Kenworth ass spanked – The seat in that truck is really uncomfortable

  • learn lines, put on costume, get spanked – Welcome to Spanko Follies of 2019

  • Licensed Spankologist – You can buy anything on the internet these days

  • line punishment stories – When line dancing goes horribly wrong

  • LOTS OF SPANKIING – Next we have lot number 462 which contains three custom wooden paddles. Do I hear $100?

  • lover spanks booty – I love that about him

  • maid spanked in the 5th century – That’s worse than going Medieval

  • mature nylon discipline pictures – Here’s where I whipped Granny with a stocking

  • Melissa can you come single what a little bit xxxsxe – Melissa is up for anything

  • men wearing women's panties being spanked photos – I imagine they didn’t fit very well

  • Most emeradsing Spanking – Another new word to define. Emeradsing is that uneasy feeling a spankee gets when her spanking suddenly becomes way more intense than anticipated

  • most painful spanking position – Either the diaper or the toe touch

  • mothers spanking – Moms like spankings too

  • mtf needs a good spanking tumblr – A lot of us miss spanking Tumblrs

  • My big booty get giggle if someone spanked it especial naked – I got the big booty, but it doesn’t giggle when spanked

  • My bitchy brattiness earned my ass a thorough spanking from my husband – These things happen sometimes

  • my teacher really paddled my panties – Good thing I wasn’t in them

  • naked birthday spanking – Birthday suit spanking

  • naughty nurses spanked by matron – White is definitely your color

  • non sexual discipline stories about naughty werewolves getting spanked – C’mon, that is totally sexual
That’s all for this installment.

Wednesday, March 13, 2019

Keyword Chaos Version 2019-1

It's been almost a year, so we have a massive backlog. Here are some search terms that people used to find this blog:
  • 12 days of Christmas spanking – ...And a switch cut from a pear tree

  • 1950 spanking implements mummys knee – Punishments in grainy black and white

  • 20 REASONS WHY HUSBAND SPANK WIVES – If his wives like it, who cares about the other 19?

  • a bottom for a top spanking switch paddlings – Swing your partner, dosey doe

  • a cross knee spanking blog – A cross knee is a fearsome thing

  • a down right bear butt spanking – Leave that bear alone!

  • a professor and maryann bdsm blog – Have you ever been spanked with a coconut?

  • aaah spanking Sarah – Sarah likes!

  • academic study erotic spanking – Ow! Now that’s statistically significant.

  • adult caning spanking talk – Are we talking or are we caning?

  • adult spanking blog truck – Sort of like a taco truck with the burn in back

  • adult woman lifts her skirt for a caning – No sense wasting this on kids

  • Adult woman spank bare bottom nude for bad driving – Bare = nude, right?

  • all danger babe central spanking tubes – Danger Babe is my favorite superhero.

  • all sites with severe paddled and caneing to tears real pain spanking – OK, got it

  • all spanking positions – Every single one

  • anal research – Crappy science

  • Ankle grabbing for spanking at school – This is going to hurt

  • are playful spanks between couples ok – If it brings joy, it’s right

  • ariel anderssen anal hook – Ariel is such a good sport

  • armless chair spanking – Take that, you wicked chair

  • Ass grabbing and spanking blog – Something for everyone!

  • Assume the position spanking over a chair seat – Yeah, I know the drill

  • aunt sue spanked us bear bottom – Enough with the damn bear

  • aunty inpanty – Jeannie in bikini

  • bad girls get a strapped bottom for being saucy – Naughty Hollandaise!

  • bottock spanking advantage – I’m sure there’s an advantage, but I don’t know what it is

  • bare bottom spankung – Everybody was spankung fu fighting

  • bare bottom toasted with dads belt – Toasted belt smells like sneaker

  • bare bum spa king – With all due respect, Sire, I’m not getting in that gross hot tub

  • bare traps sandals roanna – Huh?

  • beautiful bottom spanking tumblr – Yes, Tumblr should be spanked

  • belt spank hands on hips fucking her doggie style – Is that even anatomically possible?

  • belt welt bare fanny – cane pain sore fanny

  • bend over these pillows for your spanking – Actually, I prefer those pillows

  • best spanking position – The one that works

  • Big bottom spankings – OK, here we go

  • big butt syndrome spanking – Yeah, I’ve got a terminal case

  • Big rump spanking – Managed like a civil engineering project

  • blue bottom spanking – Red roses for a blue lady

  • Bonnie being spanked – Yes, that definitely happens

  • bonnie spanked while wearing a thong – I was also wearing a smile

  • spank bonnie big bubble butt – OK, I have a big butt

  • spank bonnie big butt – My big butt gets spanked yet again

  • spank bonnie big round rump plump big bubble butt – I am not ashamed of my curvy body

  • spank bonnie large bottom – A rear by any other name would still get whacked

  • spank bonnie padding round rump plump bubble ass – Here comes the paddle

  • spank bonnie round rump plump bubble butt – Must we?

  • spank bonnie round rump plump bubble butt with heavy wooden paddle – Hey, that thing really hurts

  • spank bonnie thick bubble ass with heavy wooden hairbrush – Thick bubble versus heavy hairbrush

  • spank bonnie thick bubblebutt – Flattery will get you nowhere

  • spank bonnie thick hips thick round rump plump thick bubble butt ass padding – Leave my hips out of this!

  • spank bonnie thick hips thick thighs and thick round rump plump thick bubble butt – Easy on the thighs, OK?

  • spank bonnie thick round rump plump thick bubble butt with a heavy wooden paddle – Didn’t we already do this?

  • spank bonnie thick thick round rump plump thick bubble butt butted round – Double thick?

  • spank bonnie thick thick thick large bottom – Hold on, this is getting personal

  • spank bonnie thick thick thick thick round rump plump thick bubble butt – 5x thick, really?

  • boyfriend spanks me but doesn't take my pants down – I’ll bet he will if you ask

  • brat spanker in cincinnati – What's with the turkeys?

  • Bratting out for a spanking – She earned it the old fashioned way

  • brides behaving baddly – Newlyweed speling knot soo gudd

  • bubble butt girl spanked story – We love butt girl stories

  • cable wire spanking videos – That cable is pure evil

  • canning ass in standing position – We’re going to need a bigger mason jar

  • capsaicin on butt for spanking – Ben Gay flay day

  • cheer captan paddled at school – Everybody likes cheerleader spankings

  • CHEERLEADER SPANKED TILL BUTT TURNS RED – Rah rah raddle, spanked with a paddle

  • cheerleaders paddled – Lift that pleated skirt, lower those cute little briefs, drop the pom-poms

  • cheerleaders spanked – Been there, done that

  • im your little bitch cheerleader spank – Whatever, get in line

  • mother spanked cheerleader – Yeah, mom and everybody else

  • paddling cheerleaders – This is a very popular subject

  • schoolswatscheerleading – This cheerleader paddling thing is a major kink

  • spanked cheerleaders – Flip that skirt

  • spanked woodshed cheerleader – I picture team pennants on the wall

  • Spanking cheerleader camp – Preparation for competitive spanking

  • stories about cheerleaders paddlong – This has gone on way too long

  • choose your spanking – If you choose to bend over his knee, go to page 128

  • College girl getting her buns burnt with the paddle – Not all education occurs in the classroom

  • competitive bare butt whipping – That’s a five from the Bulgarian judge

  • couples birthday spanking – Candles are just the beginning

  • Court judge grown woman to be spank barebottom nude as discipline – This is a very specific fantasy

That’s enough for now. More to come!

Monday, February 18, 2019

There They Are!

A couple of weeks ago, I wondered whether we could find some departed spanko colleagues. So I put out the word.

To my delight, several old friends appeared! Returning bloggers included Roz (who's not really gone), Tomy, DaddyCat, Abby, Susie, and Carly. I think that's an impressive list of celebrities, especially given that this was a spontaneous experiment limited to one seldom updated blog.

What if we tried again with more blogs promoting the concept simultaneously? It might work a bit like LoL Day, but with old friends instead of new ones. It could provide an opportunity to catch up, tell our departed sisters and brothers how we feel about them, and wish them well.

Is this concept worth the effort required to launch and coordinate it? What do you think?

Sunday, February 03, 2019

Where Are They Now?

Hello again, friends.  As we cruise through this final year of another decade, I find myself in a retrospective frame of mind.  I often wonder about the hundreds of beloved spanko bloggers, skilled content creators, brilliant models, and fascinating personalities who flashed across our night sky.  How have their lives changed since they departed?  Are spankings still part of their days?  Do they miss being a part of our community?  What wise advice can they share with today?

So what if we turn Love Our Lurkers sideways?  What if we invite our former colleagues to provide a brief update?  Let's try...

If you were a spanko blogger, content creator, spanking model, or personality, but chose to leave this role, your fans and friends would love to hear how you're doing and what your life (kink or vanilla) is like today.

I invite you to leave a comment below or send me an e-mail.  Either way, I will compile and publish your responses.

I have no idea how well this idea will work, but I'm eager to catch up with lost friends.

Sunday, January 20, 2019

Stuff People Write

Thirteen years after embarking on this blogging adventure, you might think I have seen it all. But I guess I haven't. People still send me strange messages that I struggle to parse into anything meaningful. Who are these people? What do they want from me? And why me? I don't know. So here, make of it what you will, is the latest edition of Bonnie's Mailbag.

Comment: I wish bare your big resilient buttocks and cane them...

Bonnie: I appreciate your willingness to cane my big resilient buttocks, but I have someone here who does a wonderful job.

Comment: I love that you crave butt-sex!!

Bonnie: So you make up random sex fantasies about me and then tell me about them. Yeah, that's OK, right?

Comment: Day after day, all I think about is submitting to a busty Dominatrix who uses her beautiful feet to tease and torment my cock & balls, her sharp fingernails to run along my body and overstimulate my nipples, to completely control me while I'm in inescapable, hard core bondage for her amusement.

Bonnie: I'm neither busty nor a dominatrix, my feet are not beautiful, my fingernails are not sharp, and I'm not that amused. I think you have the wrong number.

Question: I was wondering if you know of any good sites for spanking personal ads ?

Bonnie: I'm sorry but I don't. Your best strategy for meeting people may depend upon where you live. Readers?

Comment: UR bottom is very spankable

Bonnie: Thank you. My husband wholeheartedly agrees.

Question: Hi where are you from

Bonnie: I am from the internet. I live inside your screen.

Question: Bonnie my name is xxxxx and I was wondering if you could give me any advice on how to accept a spanking from my guardian. Please get back to me when you can

Bonnie: All of the alarm bells sound on this one.

Question: here's my question- when you are down over his knee and hes beating your naked butt with the paddle, what do you think about?

Bonnie: Mostly, I think about the spanking I'm getting. Early on, I might count the swats or try to assess severity. As the proceedings continue and the pain mounts, I'm more likely to consider immediate concerns like when it will end. Sometimes I get turned on. OK, I almost always get turned on, but I'm not always immediately aware in that instant. Once in a while, if the spanking is just right, I feel satisfied, content, and grateful. But more often, my reaction in that moment is "Ow! That hurts!"

Question: I just saw your blogger page. I am curious, are you a spankee or a spanker?

Bonnie: You don't have to read much of my blog to answer this question.

Question: Hi Bonnie. Like you into spanking my whole life. Are we close by. im in xxxxx. Hope to know each other better

Bonnie: We're about 2000 miles apart, but it's good to meet you.

Question: I'm an adult woman who has dreamed about being spanked since early childhood. My dream has never been realized because I've never had the courage to tell partners about what I need. Reading your blog has helped me to accept this within myself and realize how wonderful this lifestyle could be. Now I want spankings more than ever. I have a newish boyfriend who might be the one. How would you suggest I ask him to spank me?

Bonnie: That's an uncomfortable moment, but it might open the path to the fulfillment you desire. Here is a tutorial I wrote on the subject. This tutorial discusses talking with your partner about spanking. I hope these articles are helpful. If you have more questions, you have my address.

So that's it for this time. Happy winter!

Tuesday, January 01, 2019

Hello 2019

Happy New Year, everyone. Let's hope 2019 will be cheerier than last year.

I've been busy cleaning blogrolls in the wake of the recent blogpocolypse on Tumblr. It is a very long and very sad job. At one point, I had to go ask Randy for a spanking to help deal with the sorrow of so many dead and wounded blogs. Countless thousands of hours of bloggers' work is now lost in the name of corporate decency. But we are rebuilding as we always have.

I know a number of former Tumblr bloggers have relocated or are trying to relocate. I am delighted to add these new links to our blogroll. Just leave me a comment or send an email and point me in the right direction.

Here's a spanking meme I found on one of those dying blogs.

Panties or bare bottom? Why not both?

How many times have you been spanked? Over 2000 (we really love it)

How often are you spanked? At least once per week

Are you currently getting spanked? Not at this moment, no

Dream spanker/spankee? Randy and me

Favorite clothing for a spankee? Depends upon the scene

Do you switch? Nope

Favorite spanking position? OTK at the edge of the bed

Most hated spanking position? Diaper

Favorite implement? a soft, flexible leather paddle

Most hated implement? Anything that breaks the skin

When was the last time you got spanked? Last night

What was the last thing you got spanked for? New Years

Do you have a preferred pairing? (M/F F/F F/M M/M) Randy and me

What is your favorite thing to do for aftercare? Um, sex

Do you have a favorite spanking artist? Wolfie

Do you have a favorite spanking writer/author? Too many to choose just one

An aspect of spanking that you like to see in fantasy but would hate in real life? Serious bondage

Well, that was a fun little diversion.

May your year be bountiful and filled with joy, contentment, and peace.

Sunday, December 09, 2018

But the Community Lives On...

Once again our community faces a hosting crisis. The majority of links on our MBS blogroll are for spanko blogs that reside on Tumblr. In a week, that will change, and not for the better.

The corporate geniuses at Verizon apparently decided that they wanted to appeal to a broader range of advertisers, even if that means a significant reduction in traffic. So they invented artificial community standards for a community that once embodied freedom of expression. Compulsory content censorship is becoming a central feature of the Tumblr platform.

Nipples seem to be a big deal to these white-shirted bluenoses. After all, they argue, seeing boobs might harm children. Never mind the actual purpose of nipples.

Nudity is another target. How dysfunctional is it that we humans are so ashamed of our own bodies that they must not be seen? Do we really have to pass this hangup to another generation?

Worse yet, they have an AI-driven porn filter that also tags all manner of innocent photos. It's possible, I'm told, to appeal to human overseers. But many bloggers will decide that it's just not worth it.

Like other platforms before it (remember Delphi, MSN, Yahoo Groups, or MySpace?), Tumblr may ultimately be abandoned and forgotten due to a faulty business calculation. We spankos will again take our clicks and our eyeballs and our interesting content elsewhere. I'm not sure who is going to see all of those new Hobby Lobby and Amway ads on Tumblr, but it won't be me.

Some will say, "This is what you get when you trust a free service." Perhaps so, but this has always been a two-sided transaction. The host gives bloggers a home to present their content. Bloggers give the host a steady stream of traffic they can use to sell advertising. I am not exploited. Nor am I a free rider. I enter this relationship with full knowledge that it can be ruined by arbitrary censorship. And so it is with Tumblr.

I will be removing Tumblr blogs from the blogrolls as they perish, but it will take a long time to sort out everything, especially during this busy holiday time. I will also be restoring relocated blogs as they return to life elsewhere. We've never seen an extinction event on this scale before, but our community has survived similar situations in the past. I am confident we will weather this storm as well.

If you have a new or moved blog, please leave me a comment or send me an email. I will get your links updated as soon as I can.

Hang on, everybody, we're going to get through this!