Bonnie's Mailbag

Another month has come and gone, so it’s time again to open the mailbag. Here is a series of questions sent to me via e-mail. In many cases, I’ve already answered the sender, but I thought you might enjoy sharing in the exchange of information as well. Some of the questions are summarized for the sake of brevity.

Question: When was the last time you were taken over a chap's knee and soundly spanked?

Response: Yesterday!

Question: I really enjoyed the Whaxton parody. Do you work in higher education?

Response: No, but Randy and I are both graduates and we recently put our daughter through college.

Question: What is your bra size?

Response: It depends somewhat upon the brand and style of bra. I can be anywhere from a 36B to a 38C.

Question: I would like to discuss adult only bare bottom spankings with the help of a carpet beater. Are there spanking clubs outside the major cities?

Response: Yes, I believe there are quite a few spanking clubs all over. You might start with a Google search or check your local alternative newspaper.

Question: Have you ever heard of a Berkley horse? I'm looking for a picture or a drawing of a spanking horse that was supposed to be invented by Theresa Berkley an English Dominatrix back in 1828. Theresa died in 1836 and the original spanking horse was donated to the Royal Society of Arts in London. Got any ideas? I have searched all over and can't find anything.

Response: You just educated me. Perhaps an established British BDSM club might be able to offer some suggestions. I wish you well in your quest!

Question: Will you help me fix my template?

Response: I’m by no means an expert, but I’ll assist if I can.

Question: Have you ever been spanked with a fish?

Response: No, and I believe I can live out my life in happiness without experiencing that particular set of sensations.

Question: Do you ever have the desire to spank a guy?

Response: For whatever reason, people find it hard to believe that I am a pure submissive. But I truly am. I have no desire to spank anyone.

Question: Have you any desire to be spanked by a female?

Response: That’s perhaps a bit closer to my tastes, but I prefer to play with Randy.

Question: Do you ever spank your husband?

Response: Not a chance. I have no issue with anyone who chooses to switch. It’s just not our thing.

Question: Would you be interested in organizing a service that brings together men and women who share an interest in spanking?

Response: It’s a wonderful idea. I hope some eager entrepreneur picks it up and makes a million. Alas, my life is too crowded for a new business venture.

Question: Will you check out my new web site and let me know what you think?

Response: Sure.

Question: I’m having a difficult time getting my husband interested in spanking me. Have you any suggestions?

Response: We did a brunch on this very topic a while back. There were a number of insightful answers.

In general, I think the first step is to connect with your husband as a loving partner in every other way. If you are communicating well and each working to fulfill the other’s needs, an erotic spanking will hopefully follow as a natural consequence. I recognize that it’s seldom so easy, but that loving connection opens the door for real sharing.

Question: Have you ever had a spanking so severe that it drew blood?

Response: Yes, a few times. It was purely an accident, typically when we were experimenting with a new implement. We’re not into blood at all. It definitely spoils the fun.

Here are several keys to avoiding cuts:

1. Beware of rigid toys with abrupt edges. Paddles and yardstick with right angle corners can be particularly troublesome. For safety, sand or file them down to a smooth, rounded surface.


2. Thin, whippy canes can also break the skin if used too hard or too often. Please be careful with these implements.


3. If a paddle has holes, they need to be beveled. As above, the idea is to avoid sharp edges.


4. Fresh switches are fun playthings, but they are notorious for leaving cuts. Apply them with care.


5. Any single-tail whip can create serious lacerations. These implements should be employed only by someone who is very familiar with their use.


6. Back off at the appearance of blood and apply first aid. Continuing to play will only worsen the condition and delay the healing.

Question: My wife loves to be spanked. But lately she's lost some interest. She tells me it's mainly because I want to spank too often, and I talk about it too much. What should I do?

Response: I think every couple has to find their own formula. Ideally, you and your wife can meet somewhere in the middle. If not, you may have to adjust to her preferred level of interest. A little spanking is greatly preferable to none at all.

I hear from lots of folks who wish their spouses were as interested as yours. Rejoice in the relationship you have and work to make it better every day. If you understand what she likes and provide it unselfishly, she will be likely to indulge your interests as well.

Please listen to her. She's telling you what she wants. Be glad she wants it from you! Hug her. Comfort her. Kiss her. Shower her with unexpected gifts. Remind her all over again why she fell in love with you. Women adore romance - not big things, but a series of small, sweet gestures. Before you put a mark on her bottom, I suggest you put a smile on her face.

Question: What’s it like having a big, luscious butt?

Response: Well, I really don’t have anything with which to compare. I have what I have and I am very grateful that Randy is fond of my bottom just as it is.

Thanks for your comments and questions!

Keywords: spanking, My Bottom Smarts, blogging