Keyword Chaos Lives!

Yes, it's time for another installment of the feature that readers create one search at a time. One of the odd pleasures of operating a blog is reviewing the search strings that visitors use to find MBS. Some of them were clearly looking for something other than a spanko blog. In other cases, I can't imagine what they hoped to find. Some are downright humorous and those queries lead us here, to Keyword Chaos.

• Are spankings real on television shows? - They're every bit as real as Jerry Springer and professional wrestling!


• credit card spanking toys oh damn - There's not too much mystery about the fate of someone who exceeds their credit limit buying spanking toys


• grow hips and bottom enhancement - I used an all-natural technique known as motherhood


• I want you to see my bottom - Confessions of a recreational mooner


• How to spank sexily - It's the attack of the mutant adverbs!


• Why would a woman cry during a spanking? - Umm, let's see... It hurts?


• spanking red thong protection - Regardless of hue, thongs don't provide any spanking protection at all


• spank my bottom samples - With any purchase today, we'll give you a coupon good for five free whacks at our spanking booth


• hard spankings deserve skirt - If you misbehave again, you'll have to wear the comfortable skirt


• spanking history - We now know that Julius Caesar's wife, Calpurnia, was quite fond of whippings with a leather harness


• bottom smarts women - Watch for our brand spanking new 2007 calendar: "The Women of My Bottom Smarts"


• maple paddle whack butt - I love Canadians!


• yard sale hairbrush spanking - Yep, that will attract a good crowd


• spanking crack - It is pretty addictive


• bar bottom spanking - I picture a Wild West saloon with the big mirror and lots of cowboys and townsfolk. Maybe the marshall could do the honors...


• do you want your bottom spanked - C'mon, I hardly know you!


• spank you until your buttocks fall off - If you very carefully pack them in ice and take them to the nearest emergency room, they can often be surgically reattached


• why spanking? - Because we like it!


• BDSM and Tabasco - Talk about spicing up your sex life!


• how I met your mother brunch recap - OK, there's a topic I hadn't considered


• spanking therapist - Vas your muther a schpanko?


• punishment panty girdle - Sounds redundant to me


• spank city - On the scenic shores of Lake Swatchuwarmly


• panty cuts - If they give you cuts, buy a bigger size


• my massage secretary - Let me guess, she's not much of a typist


• dancing spanked bottoms - Ah, yes, the old hop and rub two-step


• what is a spanko? - Considering that this person read 26 pages, I think they need only look in the mirror


• aunties kinky undies - Hey, even aunties are entitled to a little fun!


• spank me panties - So says the submissive transvestite pirate


• silly spankings - That rubber chicken hurts more than you think


• wool pantyhose spanking - Wool? Are you kidding me? That should be punishment enough


• spankopoly - Watch out for Boardwalk!