State of the Blog

For those who are eager to read about spanking, you might want to skip this post. For anyone still here, I would like to talk a bit about blogging and this blog in particular. I have no big announcements, but there are some milestones worthy of note:

• We now have over 500 links (Thanks to all spanko bloggers!)
• We now have 500 followers (Thanks to all of you as well)
• We now have over 1000 RSS feed readers (Glad you're out there)

Pretty cool, huh?

Blogroll Presentation

I mentioned the 500 links, but all is not well over in the linkage department. First the good news. The alphabetic blogroll, labeled Kindred Spirits, works great and is completely up to date. The color codes allow readers to get a sense of a blog's content before they visit.

Unfortunately, the chronological blogroll (Good and Hot) is ailing. About a month ago, some clever programmer at Google touched the code that updates gadget contents and broke it. Since then, I have been unable to add, update, or delete links. Since the listing is chronological, old or dead links automatically sink to the bottom (where they will cause no trouble). However, not adding new blogs is a more serious problem. If Google is fixing these bugs, or even developing a work-around, they haven't told us. For now, there seems to be a new effective maximum blogroll size of around 170 links.

I'm surprised that no one has complained about missing links. That means either it isn't as big as problem as I think or people aren't paying close attention.

In any case, I needed a stopgap. The solution I came up with was to create second chronological blogroll to maintain links for more recently added blogs. It is named Newest of the New and it's currently located at the very bottom of the right column (yes, all the way down there). In the past month, I've added over sixty new links. I've decided the idea of having a separate blogroll to highlight new blogs actually has some merit independent of Blogger's problems. I think it should probably be displayed in a more prominent place, but that involves moving around everything else.

This is where I need to solicit your thoughts. I know the blogrolls are very important to many readers. Today, the items in the right column are organized like this:

• Profile
• Good and Hot (G&H) - Somewhat broken chronological blogroll
• Twiddlies - Drop down links, followers, and miscellaneous gadgets
• Kindred Spirits (KS) - Clean and complete color-coded alphabetic blogroll
• Newest of the New (NotN) - Growing chronological blogroll for blogs added since the gadget bug appeared

Let's assume for now that the profile stays on top.

How should I organize the right column? G&H, Twiddlies, KS, NotN G&H, Twiddlies, NotN, KS G&H, KS, Twiddlies, NotN G&H, KS, NotN, Twiddlies G&H, NotN, Twiddlies, KS G&H, NotN, KS, Twiddlies Twiddlies, G&H, KS, NotN Twiddlies, G&H, NotN, KS Twiddlies, KS, G&H, NotN Twiddlies, KS, NotN, G&H Twiddlies, NotN, G&H, KS Twiddlies, NotN, KS, G&H KS, G&H, Twiddlies, NotN KS, G&H, NotN, Twiddlies KS, Twiddlies, G&H, NotN KS, Twiddlies, NotN, G&H KS, NotN, G&H, Twiddlies KS, NotN, Twiddlies, G&H NotN, G&H, Twiddlies, KS NotN, G&H, KS, Twiddlies NotN, Twiddlies, G&H, KS NotN, Twiddlies, KS, G&H NotN, KS, G&H, Twiddlies NotN, KS, Twiddlies, G&H Current Results

I've also pondered a more permanent solution that involves several smaller chronological blogrolls organized by blog type (like the color codes). But that seems like a lot of work to create and maintain, and I'm not sure it would be helpful to the reader.

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Link Guidelines

Speaking of the blogrolls, I've fielded some questions lately about what I do and do not link. The criteria haven't changed in a couple of years, but they're perhaps worth mentioning again. I link every spanking-oriented blog I find, with the following exceptions:

1. Sites that are not organized as a blog with dated posts
2. Blogs that have not been updated in two months or more
3. Blogs that are private or require a registration/subscription
4. Blogs that lack significant spanking content
5. Blogs whose primary purpose is advertising
6. Blogs that contain little or no original content
7. Blogs that depict children or non-consenting adults as spankees
8. Blogs that feature extremely graphic or offensive content
9. Blogs with considerable text in a language other than English
10. Blogs authored or frequented by minors
11. Blogs that advocate abuse or exploitation of women

Please note that there is no prohibition against M/M spanking blogs. I have simply yet to encounter one that fits within these parameters.

I have no issue with anyone blogging as they choose. I attempt to link blogs that will be of interest of MBS readers. You've told me what you like and these guidelines largely reflect that. If you think it's time to revise these standards, I'd like to hear your ideas.

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Comment Verification

So what do you think of Blogger's new CAPTCHA techniques? Those are the fuzzy words that must be deciphered and retyped when you want to leave a comment. I've used this tool for years to keep out robo-spam comments. It's always been a lesser evil for me, but the new version is difficult even for humans.

There are alternatives, but until now, I've considered them to be worse. I could turn on comment moderation, but comments would appear only after I approve them. When I'm away, it could be hours or even days before they appear. I use this technique today for posts over one week old, but the volume of comments is very low. I could disallow all anonymous comments, but I think that might destroy the feeling of openness. I also question how effective it would be.

I could simply turn off the verification and allow Blogger's spam detection to filter out the bad stuff. I'm not very impressed by what I've seen of this technology so far. A couple of weeks ago, they quarantined Hermione's brunch response, and there are some readers who seem to be systematically filtered for some reason. On the flip side, some very spammy comments still get through. If I choose this option, there will be a lot of housekeeping. Again, I value your opinions.

What do you think about comment verification? CAPTCHA is a necessary evil Don't allow anonymous comments Let Blogger filter the spam Try comment moderation None of the above / Something else Current Results

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Censorship

Today is President's Day here in the US. I don't talk about politics on this blog, primarily because I want all readers to feel welcome. But in honor of the holiday and the ongoing election process, I will make a brief exception. Is anyone else troubled by the fact that the three leading Republican candidates have all signed a pledge to work toward eliminating pornography?

People disagree about what constitutes pornography and therein lies the problem. I think this blog is pretty tame, but I have no doubt that it is offensive to someone. If we allow our government to eradicate any speech that offends anyone, none of us will be able to say anything. As problematic as corporate censorship is, government censorship is far worse because they have the ability to lock people away for their views. What has happened to the party of small government and individual liberties?

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Wrapping Up

I guess that's about it, except to remind you that I like to hear what you think. This is your blog as much as it is mine. Please tell me how we can make it better. I'm listening...

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Feb 19

Our topic this week was the duration of a spanking. Here are your thoughts.

Sublime Wifey: I've never really thought about the time that a spanking takes. I think my longest spanking might have been one of the first I ever received, mostly because this was new and my husband was taking his time. He was worried, nervous, but enjoying it all the same. It was only ten or fifteen barehanded swats with lots of wait time in between.

On the other hand, the most spanks I ever received -100 quick wrist-flicking swats with a wooden spoon - didn't take long at all. There were ten sets of ten with short breaks in between to check his work. All this to say time disappears during a spanking. It's just about the count and the sensation and even that becomes relative. I have no idea how long a spanking takes or if longer ones are more effective. I do know that each time I've been spanked it's been just the right amount.

The VBB: The average discipline spanking last about twenty minutes. That includes scolding, the actual spanking, breaks to change implements, additional scolding and the final "lets finish this up" spanking. If it's a play spanking, it can last between ten minutes to thirty minutes depending how she feels or how playful she is. Sometimes she gets so involved in the play spanking that she looses all sense of time and just keeps on going until she gets tired.

Enzo and Charlotte: I think that in a spanking session, the time is not important. Most depend upon the pleasure of the Master and the submission of the slave.

A good spankee is more receptive to long sessions. My wife and I, for example, play at spanking for a couple of hours. But when she deserves a severe punishment, the time of the session is less and the outcome more painful.

Hermione: I find it difficult to remember to look at the clock both before and after a spanking, but our sessions last anywhere from five to fifteen minutes. The longer the better, as far as I am concerned.

Spankings are shorter when they are a prelude to other erotic activities. The longer ones are for stress relief or for fun, and they tend to go on longer if we have a generous assortment of implements to use.

Elysia: How long does your average spanking last? I would say fifteen minutes to a half hour, from announcement to completion. That does not include cuddles and aftercare.

What's the longest time you've ever spanked or been spanked? Likely it was close to an hour, with breaks in between. This when we had the house to ourselves. Like Hermoine, I don't look at the clock. LOL I'm just guessing.

Is a longer spanking generally more effective? Longer spankings are punishment or erotic. Obviously, they have different purposes. LOL H changes to implements for a punishment: Hand, leather paddle, wooden paddle and sometimes back through them again. And erotic spanking is just drawn out because of interspersed other activities. LOL

On those occasions when a spanking continues longer than usual, what are the reasons? Punishment. They are harder, and longer. H often begins spanking hard, changing implements, taking a break, having me stand up and sometimes go back over for more. It can take time to make sure he's done his job properly.

Reece Seever: All of our sessions are for discipline/punishment. While the seem to last forever, in reality, the spanking itself probably lasts 5 minutes.

Welcome back, Reece!

Joan: It's one of those events where time goes relative and wonky. I couldn't even tell you.

OldFashionedGirl: I must find the stopwatch function on my phone. Actually, times vary. A quickie when the kids are out has to be just that, a minute or two and that's it.

More memorable sessions have lasted an hour or so if you set that stopwatch running when the warning finger was shaken in my direction and turned it off as the corner time ended.

Penelope: Joan puts it just right for me – "time goes relative and wonky." I've been spanked countless times and I really couldn't guess what the average duration was. Just generally “pretty long,” as my wonderful better half understands that I can never get enough. Bless him.

Prefectdt: How long does your average spanking last? – I prefer longer spankings, at least a half hour and normally an hour.

What's the longest time you've ever spanked or been spanked? – It was not continuous and there was a lot of two person am dram between the actual spankings, but it was over an afternoon and an evening. I would guess it took about nine hours.

Is a longer spanking generally more effective? – Yes, the longer the play, the higher I fly. :)

On those occasions when a spanking continues longer than usual, what are the reasons? – Usually time is available for both parties and we have a good place to play.

Daisy: How about early morning until late at night? One day, Davey decided to give me a maintenance spanking. I got 100 swats EVERY HALF HOUR, throughout the day! I posted the whole story on my blog.

D :Time does not come into it, as the rate of spanking can vary from slow to fast, so it is up to me to decide when S and her lovely bottom have been spanked enough to meet her needs, and mine, and this can vary a lot!

S: My longest spanking was when I was in for one, and I rashly said, "Bet you can't make me ask you to stop." D smiled and replied, "Oh, yes I can." In a moment, I was bare bottomed and over his knee, with my hands tied to the legs of the chair to stop me bouncing up. Then his broad palm started spanking down onto my tight bottom, hard and steadily. On and on it went, I don't know how long, but my bottom was soon burning and smarting, and felt twice its usual size. I would have loved to beg for mercy, but I was determined to stick it out, and stayed squirming and yelling across D's lap.

At last, it must have been twenty minutes in, he paused. "I think my palm stings more than you bottom. Susan?" He reached out for a wooden hair brush, and down that came onto my now super tender cheeks. Five was enough."Stop David please, that's enough, you win." He helped me up. My bottom really hurt, but I also felt very randy. There was no way could I lie down, so had to bend over again for a memorable rogering.

Luckily the next day was Sunday, so there was no work which was just as well, as there was no way could I sit, and I was tender for several days after that.

Respecting Mistress: Like Reece Seever, our sessions are purely punishment. Mistress tends to cane me in batches of twelve with a short break of no more than 30 seconds between batches. She normally give me 36 maximum and then I'm released from the bench to continue my chores. Sometimes, though, I can go over that bench several times in a day.

Before we adopted our DD lifestyle, our more “playful sessions” used to last all evening, using straps, paddles, a crop and canes, but I never received any one implement for longer than a couple of minutes. It's a really tough question because, like others have noted, it seems like you're bent over for ages. In fact, 36 strokes of the cane, with ten seconds between strokes takes only about seven minutes. When you think about the incredible roller-coaster of emotions you go through during that time, it's amazing.

Ronnie: It depends on the type of spankings. It can be a quick OTK session lasting five minutes to a longer spanking lasting thirty minutes or more. The longer, the better, I say.

Tenth Muse Top: I would say that, rather like sex, the length of the spanking depends on whether it is a 'quickie,' a prolonged session, a semi-serious 'correction' or just an adventure! So it takes between a few minutes and, er, a couple of days, with the usual breaks for food, making love and dozing in between! And in that sense, the longer the better!

I'm a Top, but my partner's pleasure and her responses are essential to my pleasure, so consent is my guide in the end. I may take her to the limit, or tease her below what she wants, to nearly the point of rebellion - so long as she is still with me - variety is the spice of life!

And every now and then, she turns the tables on me and then, not being that great at being on the other end, boy is my teasing brought home to, erm, roast! LOL

morningstar: I would say that the "average" spanking session for us runs anywhere from thirty to sixty minutes. I do know that the tick tock of a clock is not what makes a session effective or good. Sometimes the endorphins kick in quickly. Other times, not so much so. The endorphins - for me - are what make a session effective.

As for how effective a longer session is, I can say that there is such a thing as TOO long. A couple of summers ago, my partner (at the time) and myself agreed to do a spanking demo. The arrangement was thirty minutes on and thirty minutes off.

Unfortunately, the other couple never showed up. As a result, the spanking demo went on for just over two hours. At the end, I was not coherent. In fact, I couldn't form sentences. My body was shaking and my sugar dropped dangerously low. I can honestly say there is such a thing as too long a session and I will never allow myself to be put into that kind of situation again.

A'marie: Hurrah. :D

I don't know that I have an average, but something akin to ten minutes. The longest has probably been about twenty minutes.

Effective? I'm not sure, I think more experimenting is called for. ;) As to being extended, I have always been the one to indicate a spanking is over. If that were ever to change, it would probably be my mouth that extended the time frame.

Thanks, A'marie, for proposing this excellent question.

Lea: This is a very interesting question and coincidentally something I was just discussing with a friend. I never quite know how to end a scene. The top usually does it. As someone with remarkable marking abilities and a somewhat low pain tolerance, my spankings don't usually NEED to be too long to get the point across.

If I had to guess I'd say they are usually five to ten minutes, but I'm not exactly timing them. Playful ones are definitely shorter than disciplinary ones. Those can be longer, but not just for the spanking itself, there are often breaks for corner time or where I'm being lectured, and things like that.

Bonnie: I agree with everyone who said that the ideal length depends upon the purpose and situation. On some occasions, we've spanked on and off all day long and not felt saturated. Other times, two minutes full go with the wicked wooden bathbrush leaves me ready to run for cover. A resourceful spanker considers these factors and adjusts the technique accordingly.

Thanks, everyone, for joining our brunch conversation. I hope to see you again next weekend!

MBS Spanko Brunch #318

Finally, the weekend is upon us. Our question this time comes from our dear friend A'Marie. The topic is duration.

How long does your average spanking last? What's the longest time you've ever spanked or been spanked? Is a longer spanking generally more effective? On those occasions when a spanking continues longer than usual, what are the reasons?

For anyone new, the brunch works like this - readers enter their responses as comments and at the end of the weekend, I post an edited summary. I'd like to hear what you think.

In with the New: Valentines Edition

Happy Valentine's Day, my friends! As my seasonal gift to you, here are fifteen new spanking-oriented blogs to explore and enjoy!

A Spanko World Aim to Please Only Him Assume the Position Studios Boys Get Spanked (F/M) Call Me Sir He Calls Me Babe I'm Sorry, Sir Our Secret to Our Perfect Marriage Reflections on Red Spanked Wife UK Spanking News Blog Spankings Free Here Whip It Who's Sorry Now? (F/x) Wives Submit

Legend General Spanking Photos/Videos Model/Industry DD Blogs Authors/Stories Ds/BDSM Blogs

To these new members of our community, I bid you welcome. If you would like some blogging tips and suggestions, try these. In any case, we're very glad you're here!

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Feb 12

Our question this time dealt with whether spankings can be romantic. Here are your thoughts.

Country Spanker: We like a romantic spanking. Mrs CS dictates that for this one (and only this one) we both have to be naked. She goes over my knee while I sit on the bed. We have to start off slowly and there has to be a lot of rubbing that she does not usually get. I have to continue until she is ready. Don't worry, there will be no pictures.

CS, I think your photos are very tasteful.

Sunny Girl: Spankings are almost always a part of our foreplay. It can be butt spanking, nipple spanking, or pussy spanking, but it's all done with lots of touching and kissing. Talking about it and anticipating it can also be very romantic.

CurtisG: All of my spankings, mostly giving and some taking, are either romantic or playful. That's spanking's allure for me.

Riley: Spankings are a big part of our romantic life. Sometimes they are playful. He'll pat me as I'm cooking or walking by him. He'll even make it into a game sometimes. I have to do something challenging and he usually makes it 100% impossible for me to carry through. It's often something like, "balance this on your head and then jump up and down." Of course it ends in a spanking! ;) Other times, it's less of a game and I go over his knee and get a combination of gentle spanks and caresses which is lovely. It's enough to show that he's the dom, but still a very nice and soothing atmosphere.

Make Mine Red: All of ours are for foreplay so, yes, definitely romantic and always a turn-on!

Hermione: For us, spankings are an expression of love, and every one has some element of romance about it.

Old Fashioned Girl: Spanking is foreplay and fun, but not romantic. For me, they are like oil and water. Or do I mean oil and vinegar?

That's a whole different euphemism!

R Humphries: As our spanking life is predominately of a role-playing, theatrical, and erotic nature, I believe that we both find our play-times entirely romantic. Wishing y’all a Happy Valentines day.

Daisy: Our spankings are sometimes fun, sometimes downright hilarious, and sometimes serious - either maintenance or punishment. Even some maintenance ones are fun. Maybe it's me and my definition of romantic, but simply because the whole spanking thing came into being from my request, I consider there to be romance in every one. There is ALWAYS aftercare, which is so romantic. Depending on the severity of the spanking, the aftercare ranges from rubbing and kissing and just gentle touching, to cool washcloths, lotion, reassuring cuddles and pillow talk with many I love yous. Oh, I LOVE TTWD!

Jean Marie: My good girl spankings are pure foreplay and so are the epitome of romantic!

Spanky: Most of our spankings are of the erotic or romantic variety. Spanking brings about a real feeling of closeness with all the touching, stroking, etc. And the endorphins it produces are very beneficial as well, I think.

Poppy: I think romance is about reconnection, understanding and the kind of unspoken moments of love that pass between two people. I think spanking often has this kind of romance. It about being accepted, loved and understood for being just who and what you are. It is about the other person wanting to be the best they can be for you. It is about finding a home in another person's arms that you never knew you missed. I think spanking is very often romantic, for all these reasons, but it's messy, real romance, not the Hallmark/all for profit kind.

Ronnie: Our spankings are a mixture of erotic, fun and serious and I would say all of them are in some ways romantic, especially afterward with the cuddling, rubbing of the lotion, touching and stroking.

Loki Darksong: Oh yes! Very much so! Spankings can be very romantic. For example, after an evening out, I love it when my wife dresses up in nothing more than an over-sized men's shirt and a pair of panties. Our play begins with her over my lap with a long spanking that begins over her panties and progresses to her bare.

It is sometimes difficult to put the emotions of that spanking into words. There is passion behind it. Not the type found in play spankings. It is hard. It is lengthy. But there is a warmth that goes with it. You can feel her arousal with every yelp and squirm and jerk of her body. The cooing sound she makes when I stop for a moment to stroke her rear. And then the look in her eyes when her clothing is removed.

You can use your imagination for the rest, but I believe that you can see my point. And lest we not forget, there once was a fertility holiday where spanking of a sort played an important role. It was called The Lupercalia. A very interesting holiday indeed.

Saoirse: It is always romantic. An alpha wolf, He demands my submission and writes His dominance on my flesh.

Lea: Spankings can certainly be romantic and sensual. It's really the tone and headspace of the spanking that changes that for me, the physical intensity of it can still vary from light to harder. If implements are used, I definitely prefer leather to wood. :-)

Bonnie: We spank for many reasons, but romance is the common thread that runs through all of them. The act is an expression of our love and the connection we share. It's a part of our lovemaking.

I guess that makes it pretty much unanimous. Have a splendid and spanko Valentine's Day, everyone!

MBS Spanko Brunch #317

Valentine's Day is a time for lovers to rekindle their romance and set the night ablaze. Our discussion this week deals with the role of spanking in this celebration.

In your relationship(s) and experience, can spankings be romantic? If so, what elements of spanking contribute to a romantic evening? If not, could you imagine a spanking being given in this context?

In case anyone is new to brunch (welcome!), here's how it works. Everyone who wishes to answer our question enters their responses as comments below. Anonymous contributions are welcome, so long as they are respectful and on topic. Once all of the thoughts are recorded, I publish an edited summary of our conversation. I look forward to hearing what you have to say.

Spanking Blogs: Myth and Reality

I was recently invited by the publishers of Wellred Weekly to contribute a guest article on a topic related to blogging. The result was Spanking Blogs: Myth and Reality. As the title suggests, I present a series of ten common misconceptions regarding spanking blogs and then set the record straight. I hope you enjoy it!