During our scheduled Friday evening spanking session, Randy and I explored this question. He knew the plan. I didn’t. Here’s a lightly edited transcription of an audio recording:
R: I see you followed my instructions exactly.
B: Yes, I’m wearing the short pleated mini-skirt and ruffled panties you set out.
R: Good girl.
B: I see you you have your camera.
R: Yes, that’s going to be another part of tonight’s fun.
B: And that [big nasty solid hardwood] brush?
R: Pick it up.
B: OK.
R: Now stand right here (indicating a spot on the carpet with his foot)
B: (steps forward and extends the brush, handle first)
R: Nope. Not tonight.
B: (confused) What?
R: You’re going to do the spanking tonight.
B: (annoyed) You’re kidding.
R: No, tonight you find out what it’s like to deliver a good hard spanking.
B: Um
R: Stand here and let me focus the camera.
B: Self spanking?
R: Bingo
B: Must I?
R: We’ll do it together.
B: I don’t...
R: Now spread your legs a little bit more. Lean forward. Good. Now swat your bottom hard with the back of the brush.
B: (swat)
R: Hard, I said. This is a spanking. It’s supposed to hurt.
B: (swat)
R: That’s better. Now keep going. And as you strike, say, “Bad Girl!”
B: (more swats alternating sides) bad girl
R: Let’s hit harder
B: Ow, I don’t like this. (more swats)
R: Please lower your panties and continue
B: (loud swats) Bad Girl
R: That’s good. Your butt is getting nice and red
B: (swats) This is not fun. (swats)
R: All right. Do you want me to finish the job?
B: Yes please
R: OK, let me move the camera. There, now get over my lap.
B: Yes, sir
R: (rubbing bottom with the smooth side of the brush) That was a good warm up. Now let’s get on with the real spanking.
B: Ow, ow, ow!
R: (several minutes and many swats later) That should be sufficient. Get up and put your nose in the corner
B: (inaudible)
R: Lift your skirt. And no rubbing! (flash pictures being taken)
R: (sometime later) So how did you like getting to do the spanking this time?
B: Not much. It seemed like I had to do your job and my job too. When I am worrying about the actual spanking, I don’t get much chance to experience all of the spanking sensations.
R: I find it very enjoyable to smack that wood against your skin. It makes such a crisp, resounding thwack sound.
B: That’s all the more reason why you should be the one to do it.
R: So would you try self-spanking again?
B: I suppose, but it will never be a favorite.
R: I loved watching and filming it. I wasn’t sure you could give yourself a really good spanking, but you did.
B: The second part was a lot more satisfying for me. Just spank me.
R: OK, I hear you. So, do you feel punished?
B: Actually, I think I do. If you make me do that, I must be atoning for something really naughty. Right?
R: I’ll remember that. Does your bottom still hurt?
B: Oh my. Yes, definitely.
So that’s the story. We experimented with self-spanking previously, but it had been a long time. I even included it in one of my fictional stories about a long distance relationship. But it wasn’t a part of our repertoire. Maybe it will be in future. Maybe this was a one-off experiment. I guess we’ll see.
Here’s what I learned:
- Even with my arm bent around in an odd position, I could still deliver a painful spanking. That curved handled wooden brush hurts!
- It’s difficult to swat yourself hard. But the accumulation of whacks built into a really hot bottom.
- I was able to master a variant of the wrist snap that Randy uses so effectively. A good spanking consists of more than just crashing a heavy implement against the skin. That snap adds sting to the thud.
- Self spanking was not satisfying for me. The spanker role distracted from the spankee role. The latter is always my preference. However, if Randy were out of the picture, I might try it. But without him there, I imagine it would be even less enjoyable.
- I was very relieved when Randy took over. What I crave is not the pain, though I need that, but the control. I want him to place me over his lap and take charge.
- Repeating the words, “Bad Girl,” as I spanked myself was a little weird (a little like the Shame scene in Game of Thrones). It felt silly and yet, it sort of reinforced my submissive stance.
- Speaking of submission, I've talked before about participating in my own spanking by fetching the paddle or baring my bottom. Never have I been more a direct participant. Actually administering each burning swat made me more than accepting and more than complicit. I truly owned this spanking.
- There was another feeling beyond submission. It was embarrassment for lack of a more accurate description. Here I was, a capable adult woman standing in the middle of the room and spanking my own bottom repeatedly with a hairbrush on command. Wearing a way too short white tennis skirt with white fluttery briefs enhanced the experience. For reasons that not even I fully comprehend, that’s kind of a turn-on.
- Randy understands this side of me and how to expertly press my buttons. As I was writing this, he looked over my shoulder and whispered, “Next time, we’ll add a butt plug.” A shiver of mortified delight passed through me. He knows what makes me hot.
- At the end of the day, that’s what matters – a mutually satisfying experience. We made vigorous love afterward. Spankings are our first, best, and always foreplay.
Have a great week everyone!
