Dragon's Rose: Sex and making love go together, but when health gets in the way, we improvise. Making love becomes the center of our private time together. We learn more about each other when sex is not possible.
Sunnygirl: As Dragon's Rose said, I believe you find a way to improvise.
Minelle Labraun: I agree with Dragon's Rose and Sunny. You find a way to create intimacy that considers both partners.
Reece Seever: Like most men, I pout. ;-)
Don: Spanking and sex are two sides of the same coin. When one side, for what ever reason diminishes, the other side needs to be boosted to maintain balance.
As an older couple with less than perfect health, we have had to become more inventive, sensitive, considerate and spend more time fulfilling the other's needs.
And guess what? The bottom gets redder and the cuddles just keep on getting better.
Prefectdt: As far as spanking is concerned, spanking and sex have mostly been separate events for me. I think that spanking can stand up as a fun activity on its own when given the chance.
Hermione: We both enjoy spanking for its own sake. I like the adrenalin rush and the relaxed afterglow, and Ron seems to have a lot of fun reddening my bottom. If a little intimate action takes place afterward, that's a bonus. If not, there's no pressure and no expectations. When sex happens, it's usually spontaneous, while spankings are regularly scheduled, so I have the best of both worlds.
Bleuame: There have been many times where I have been injured and haven't been able to play and the sex was next to impossible. You learn to do what you can. For us, His pleasure is my focus. What other ways can I provide pleasure? How can I still please him while I can't be so physically active? Those are the questions we figure out. I think the sex thing, to be able to put it on hold and adapt comes from all those years of day-to-day intimacy.
Lea: Spanking and sex are often separate for me. I love both activities and if one had to lessen or stop because of health or other circumstances, then I wouldn't be very happy about it. But if nothing could be done, then I think my partner and I would find other ways of continuing to meet the other's needs. It would be hard though.
Michael M: Spanking and discipline are separate from sex in our household. A good spanking might lead to sex, but it is not inevitable. In many ways, I prefer it if the thrashings I am given are not followed by sex.
It gives them a certain dominant or discipline flavour.
That said, I am more than willing to give cunnilingus after a caning to show my appreciation of my wife's superiority.
Ronnie: I think you would have to become more inventive in finding different ways that were easy to achieve and pleasurable for both partners.
Hobbes: We are now in our sixties and have been at this for forty plus years through eight major surgeries [her] and three more [me]. She has two titantium hips and a plethora of other things that were not there when we started but we are still sexting and spanking and loving and it is as good as or better than ever. Our only concern is that if we make it to a nursing home, will the confines and the quiet be a problem? For that, we have the rubber hose, after we close the door and lock it. We made it through raising two kids, so we can handle the nursing home.
Jenny: I expected the question to ask, "What if spanking were no longer a viable part of the equation?" I'll address both activities.
Sex: There have been times (6 weeks each) when conventional sex was not possible. Sexual activity was less frequent (and cuddling and kissing increased), and alternatives were explored. It was okay, but we were glad when we were given the all-clear to return to conventional sex along with all else.
Spanking: I've never experienced an illness-related pause in spanking, so I don't know how we would handle that. Illness generally puts all non-essential life activities on the back burner, so I assume couples would have to reduce spanking activities for the time being and would resume when they both had the energy and ability to enjoy a little spanking.
Bonnie: We're in our mid-fifties and in reasonably good health, but we see some changes even now. The sexual gymnastics we enjoyed in our twenties are inadvisable if not impossible today. We more than compensate by adding in a few tricks that our younger selves wouldn't have imagined. Nevertheless, we have had this conversation.
Chances are that we wouldn't both lose our abilities or inclinations simultaneously. Therefore, it will fall upon one of us to find a way to accommodate the other. I know we will each do what we can to preserve our intimacy as long as possible. If there comes a day when we are reduced to gentle hugs and whispering secret stories of past adventures, we will make that pleasurable too.
Thank you all for participating in our brunch!
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