Randy and I are very much creatures of habit. We have both a standard spanking schedule and a regular spanking routine. That's not to say we can't deviate, because we do. But come Friday evening, I can expect to spend some quality time lying across his lap. How about you?
Do you and your partner have regularly scheduled spanking times? If so, how does the schedule change your experience, as opposed to spontaneous spankings? Does it help or distract the spankee to know in advance? If not, is this a practice you might consider adopting?
As always, I encourage you to share your thoughts. Please enter your response in the form of a comment below. At the end of the weekend, I will post an edited summary of our conversation.
9 comments :
A regular scheduled spanking time for myself and my wife is something that I have been considering for some time. I have difficulty bringing it up because I am still fighting off that imagined stigma of a male top who receives a spanking.
Personally, I think that we both could benefit from a set schedule. We both could use the stress break!
We also find routine is very important in our lives, and we have always set aside a specific day and time for intimate activities. Our regularly scheduled spanking happens on Saturday afternoon, and on that day I enjoy the anticipation of knowing what is in store for me later on. I like to be prepared, and knowing in advance helps me achieve the appropriate frame of mind.
That's not to say that I don't enjoy spontaneous spankings. I love surprises, and unexpected spankings are fun for both of us. Ron loves to see my reaction. But they are not as intense or as long as our scheduled ones.
We do have regularly schedule ones, but lately life has been interfering too much. So we have been squeezing them in whenever we can.
We don't have a scheduled time now, but we did when we first got into DD and spanking. We did that because we felt that DD might be a really positive thing for our relationship, but it also was taking us both well out of our comfort zones, and it might become a very short term experiment if we did not build some structure and routine into it.
Hm... Interesting question this week, Bonnie.
I've never really done maintenance spanking, which seems to me when a regular scheduled time would be most appropriate, so no I never have scheduled regular times for spanking.
However, I have found that at bit of anticipation, whether it be a few hours or a few days, can strongly enhance the bottom's experience.
It's best to leave some mystery about exactly what is going to happen, but knowing they are going to "get it" and how badly does seem both to make the spanking have more of an impact and give them time to prepare.
I don't think I'd adopt a regular schedule. I believe discipline spankings need to happen as soon after the offense as possible, and I do believe maintenance spanking can sometimes lesson the impact of discipline spanking.
I prefer not to send crossed signals.
I feel as though everything in our life is scheduled EXCEPT for time together (spanking, intimacy, chatting about the grocery list, etc.). I wish I could find a way to schedule regular spanking time, but then I feel I might get resentful if life (aka kid) disrupted that schedule, and it probably wouldn't be good for me to resent her. I would probably also get angry with my husband if we had a scheduled spanking time and he didn't keep to it ... and that anger would probably be cause for punishment that I wouldn't even get because we can't seem to schedule a spanking! ARGH!! Okay, I guess it's best that we not have a schedule right now. sigh. She'll grow up and move out one day ... right? :-)
Definately not like Bonnie's Friday nights; living with D, I never know when my bottom will be required for duty; sometimes weekley, sometimes daily and even twice daily ! D commented here recently, about how he surprised me leaning out of the window, which is typical. What we do have is a regular 'Caning Night', every three months, to mark the occasion when he first spanked me. He only uses a thin light cane, and I can wear one thin tight layer of clothing, and he means one - no knickers underneath. The evening gets closer with fear and excitement, for the caning is a big erotic turn on.I change into a thin clinging white dress. D inspects my rear view, approves, and leads me over to our trestle, taps the padded leather top with his cane. ":Bend over Susan". I lay myself over the top, reaching right down;he fixes my wrists and ankles to each leg with soft leather straps. My bottom is perfectly presented for him, drum tight and vunerable.
A pause, a swish, and the cane lands with a smart 'thwick' across the apex of my cheeks. I squeal; the first one always stings more than I remember. D canes on with a steady rythm, spreading the strokes all over my rear end, but many down to my lower skin fold and underhang, the sitting area which I will feel later, when I sit. The count is two dozen, and by the time he finishes, my bottom is blazing,I am gasping and yelping, but I am also very squelchy ! All is not finished yet; D pulls up my skirt, sits down with a drink to admire my well striped bottom, whilst I stay tied over the trestle, longing to grasp my throbbing smarting backside,but even more for him to do something about the sexy need in the middle ! At last he gets up, and I sigh with relief as he penetrates me deeply and vigoursly between my well caned globes, his tummy rubbing against my sore cheeks.
Next day, my bottom is still well striped, and sitting down a problem; I prefer to lie on my tummy, but this offers a tempting target to D for a quick spank as he passes! By the end of the week end, my cheeks are only feintly striped, and I can start counting down the days until my next caning in three months time. S
M/M day...Monday maintenance spanking is a weekly occurence. Most always on Mondays. I find it comforting to know that Monday is a spanking day, and if I or Master is away, I miss it. It is not always the same spanking..different toys or positions. It is also time when we make sure we have time to talk and really connect.
Of course, spontaneous spankings are also a treat!
abby
It changes from week to week, depending on our schedules, and we don't actually label it as such, but yes, in a way, I think we do. Sunday night we always discuss what the week holds and target any days we know we'll have an opportunity to be alone. After an evening has been identified, he'll spend the days leading up to it reminding me that he "hopes I'm preparing for my spanking."
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