Sunday, June 07, 2009
MBS Spanko Brunch #177
Welcome back to our weekly get together here at My Bottom Smarts. Our topic this time was suggested by one of my regular correspondents. I'm hoping that posing her question here will encourage her to add a comment.
As much as we might try to avoid them, interruptions are inevitable. How do you and your partner handle disruptions to your spanking preparations, sessions, or aftermath? Is it possible to resume from the place where you stopped? Do you have a strategy to minimize, escape, or ignore interruptions?
If you would like to contribute to our discussion (and I hope you will!), please leave a comment below. Once everyone has had a turn, I will post an edited summary of the proceedings.
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10 comments :
Spankus Interuptus is a most unfortunate event, and we try to avoid it with good planning. That means creating privacy and an awareness of sound control. If and when it happens, and it has, we usually try to resume if at all possible, but getting back in the mood can be difficult. Might even mean we have to start back at the very beginning! :)
Generally my husband and I didn't start play unless we knew we wouldn't be interrupted. But if we were, we didn't try to pick up where we left off. We just cuddled alot later when we got time again.
As for other partners? We always had adult only time, so there were no interruptions at all ever. Either the date was on or it wasn't.
I think its important to make couples time that's never interrupted.
Sara -- I love the term "Spankus Interuptus"!
My Master/husband live in an apartment, with no one to interrupt us, so we're quite lucky in that regard.
Normally, there might be an interruption in a scene when there is a technical difficult ("Help, there's lube spilled on the floor and my feet are sliding out from me!" being one example, during a caning that was actually coitus interruptus itself!) and in that case we just fix the problem and move on like nothing happened.
If one or both of us seriously looses "the groove," we just have snuggle time and then work our way back into it, or start something new.
It used to be a bigger issue for me, with past partners. I'm glad I'm past that stage, and can just "deal and move on" now -- makes things soooooo much easier!
Oooops, Bonnie, could you edit my sentence to be "My Master/husband and I live in an apartment" (adding that all-important "and I" bit!) -- obviously I need to get to bed and get some sleep!
My best to you both!
We always sequester our animals in another part of the house, out of sight and earshot, to eliminate the most likely source of interruption. We aren't usually interrupted by the telephone or an unexpected visitor, but it does happen from time to time. I have written about two such occasions on my blog. In one, we carried on in spite of the disturbance: in the other, we abandoned the session.
Hugs,
Hermione
Hiya, Bonnie!
So far, Davey and I have never been interrupted; since I have been going out to see him and we stay at an hotel/motel for the duration.... no-one to interrupt there!
Last time though, we stayed mostly with family, after getting married, and that just meant there was hardly any spanking, unless they had gone shopping or some such and the spankings were then short and hurried, to ENSURE no interruptions....it would have been TOO embarrassing for words!
Fortunately, our room was directly above the noisy automatic opening garage door, so we had pre-warning of their return!!!
Hugs, xxx Daisy xxx
I'm very fortunate to be living with a man who has a well appointed room in his house designated for D/s play. I wouldn't call it a dungeon, more of a playpen, but when we go in there, there is already a mindset that we're closing the rest of the world out. We're not married; there are no children to worry about. It's a special place to express our special appetite for kink. But just like we don't only eat in the dining room, we don't only spank in the playroom.
Things I've learned from past relationships to avoid interruptions:
1) Turn off all electronics. Our D/s expression and resultant love-making are more important than some phone call or text.
2) Kennel the dog. The very first time I was bound over the spanking bench, my dog wandered in and stuck his cold nose right up my butt. I was blindfolded and thought it was an icecube.My loud yelp and giggles spoiled the mood.
3) Pee first. I have an over-active bladder, and the excitement of the scenario often makes me want to pee. It's torture enough to be caned, I don't need the added pressure of trying not to let go.
As always, this brunch was yummy. I love hearing about others.
Warmly,
Jean Marie
Dear Bonnie, in my case it is a bit tougher. We get interrupted lots of times. We played in the house - from kid´s and other people. Lately, we played in the house and a craftsman came to do something to the windows from the outside (he dropped everything and fled when he heard me scream), we went the other night onto the boat and fishermen came to do nightly fishing next to it. ...
When we get interrupted after I have started to get very aroused, and before "we were finished" it unfortunately seriously troubles me, too. I cry a lot, I feel kind of depressed, I stay kind of submissive .... oh oh oh.
Hi Bonnie and everyone!
Mr. W and I are lucky enough to not experience interruptions mid-session, but our biggest issue tends to be major interruptions between the the time it becomes apparent there is going to be a spanking and the occurrence of the spanking itself. Actually getting to the spanking we've planned has become quite the complication.
Usually the subject comes up via text message during the day, or a phone call, or occasionally on the ride home from somewhere. We'll be all excited and geared up, and then something dramatic happens at work, or we get a call that one of our family members is in the hospital (that's been happening way too much lately, though everyone is ok), or something else that just kills the mood. We even took a mini-vacation recently with the specific intent of a long punishment during our one night away, and something got in the way. Fortunately, we had plenty of time in the morning before we left the hotel.
My only advice for myself and for anyone else experiencing interruptions is make a date, as soon as possible, to try again.
Important advice to tops - you are in charge of making it happen. Reschedule, and COMMIT. Even if the spanking relationship is more for sex/play than for discipline, bottoms still need their tops to take control when things like this happen. Having to remind someone that they promised to spank you is awkward for everybody.
Kids and pets are our biggest interupters to avoid. We usually save it all for later at night when the kids are asleep. There have been times when I'm laying on the bed during sex or spanking and I'll look over and see my cat staring at me with this smug look on her face. It totally makes me laugh and but I usually get back in the mood quickly. Needless to say, I try to make sure the cat is out of the room now.
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