Many places are still trapped in the frozen clutches of winter. Here at MBS, however, this weekend marks the coming of Valentine's Day, the holiday dedicated to love, warmth, and all that accompanies them.
Accordingly, our question of the week considers romance, in a slightly kinky context.
Do you and/or your partner demonstrate your love through spanking? Can pain be an expression of love? Can it be romantic?
If you would like to register your response to our question, please leave a comment below. Once everyone has had a turn, I will post an edited summary of our discussion.
19 comments :
That is an awesome, awesome cake.
We're talking about a similar topic on our blog this week. It's a good time of year to ask how romantic spanking can be... :)
For us, a spanking can definitely be romantic. That's especially true with an erotic one, though it's certainly possible with other kinds of spankings too. Even a discipline one. The words used during a spanking... expressions of love and caring... as well as gentle/sensual aftercare... can make for a very romantic atmosphere. The exchange of trust can supercharge that feeling even further.
That feeling isn't first and foremost with every spanking. Some spankings are far more playful or sexual... or even sensation based. But love is a part of every spanking we share.
:)
Todd and Suzy
ps
Hope you had a wonderful Valentine's Day!
Spanking is most definitely a caring act of love. And as we are so often reminded, there is a very thin line between pain and pleasure.....
Dr. Ken
A promised spanking during a moment of uncertainty in our relationship was the most romantic gesture ever made to me. Spanking can most definitely be romantic.
OH, yes yes yes!
Otherwise, why would it be done in a loving relationship?
It shows bonding, trust, an interest in behaviour modification; also, communication is an integral part of any successful spanking relationship, and keeping the communication going helps to develop the relationship and stop the couple drifting. I love the feeling of connection when Davey spanks me. I love that he cares enough about me to want to do this. And, romantic...certainly...when he kisses the spot he is going to, or just has, spanked... when he rubs the pain away...when we kiss afterwards...when he tickles and spanks alternately, or explores between spanks.... so many ways... xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
In our relationship there are most definitely 2 styles of spanking. One is all about the pain.. about finding that place for both of us where the pain brings us to a new height... bonds us tighter together.. and satisfies a more primal desire.
On the other hand there are times that we celebrate life together with more sensual spankings.. where the same toys that had me crying and wailing the last time - now have me sighing and wiggling.
The difference between the two is how Sir uses the toys.. uses His body. The toys stroke and caress and tease a lot more before they hit. Sir will stand close behind me.. so close sometimes i can feel His body heat against my naked body. Sir will lean in and bite my neck.. nibble on my shoulder... caress the areas being spanked (and more).. .His touch will be soft and sensual and by the time He is finished spanking me my knees are weak - and my heart all a flutter......
and no i wouldn't select one over the other as being best.. It all depends on mood .... each are the best for the day - the mood - the challenge
morningstar (owned by Warren)
Hi Bonnie,
Spanking is always an expression of love between us. Each spanking is Ron's demonstration that he loves me as he gives me that delightful pain/pleasure mixture I crave so much. It is always romantic because it is part of the physical expression of our love for and commitment to one other.
Happy Valentine's Day!
Hugs,
Hermione
Bonnie, of course spanking can be romantic, that's a given.
Erotic or good girl are romantic, but any spanking if given with love can be.
Warm hugs,
Paul.
spankings have always been erotic in nature for me. leading into sex. as one has already stated fine line between pain and pleasure. very much so an expression of love...
Everyone else has expressed the feelings just right so I'll just say YEP!
Scunge :)
I don't know if I would call spanking "romantic", but it is *definitely* a turn-on and *definitely* very sensual for my partners and me. When the spanking or paddling starts, I giggle, swoon, and writhe. It's a turn-on even after it starts to hurt. Yes, for me, sensual pleasure and pain-- the yin and yang of love-making-- are intertwined.
pammie
Good evening Bonnie,
Oh yes definitely an expression of love.
I was spanked with roses for my birthday, the ones without thorns; it was painful, erotic and romantic.
It also demonstrates loving; caring trust and communication all bundled together.
Ronnie
xx
I think spanking in itself is an act of love. The willingness to adventure into this word is a huge gesture of love.
For us there are fun spankings and there are discipline spankings. Both show me how much TJ loves me and cares for me.
Measha
I am new at this, but here are my thoughts. Spanking is always foreplay with us. Sex always follows, so it's definately about expressing love. Is it "romantic"? Well, we've been married almost 10 years now, even sex isn't always romantic. Spanking has definately made our sex life hotter though. Romance has to include romantic dialog for me. I'd love to have more romance in my spankings though!
Spanking has always been my most favored expression of connection, intimacy, excitment,eroticism and sometimes, fun. In that all of these are, at times, aspects of espressing love and romance..........HELL YES!!!!!
Tom
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined.
In my experience, spankings have been more about lust than love, though I hope that's a part of the fact that I have very little experience and none with a serious partner. I'd imagine that they could be about love between a couple if they both enjoyed it and it was for the purpose of mutual happiness with that theme. Spanking is about so much more than physical pain, including love.
When I haven't been acting stupid and earning punishment spankings, my wife has been giving me sexy play spankings. These last quite awhile, involve a considerable amount of inappropriate touching, and some role playing. She does these things because she knows I love them and I pay her back with things she loves too.
The punishment spankings she has dealt out show me her love for me too. At a base level she knows I crave the spanking and is therefore giving me what I want. But she also knows they hurt and will change my behavior. I don't want her to be upset because of something I have done, and the spanking gives her a way to "make amends" in a quick and reliable manner. So all of that contributes to the "love" in our marriage.
The entire spanking 'thing' has brought us much closer together. We now spend time cuddling on the couch or making out in the hallway. None of that happened before.
No.... darn it. Yes and yes.
I dont know.. but if girls dig it
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