Sunday, March 12, 2006

MBS Sunday Brunch #8

It's time again for our weekly brunch. I invite you to join us for a spontaneous discussion about our favorite topic. The way it works is that I will present a question and ask you to add your thoughts as comments. If you'd rather post your response on your own blog, that's perfectly fine as well. I will then summarize the responses and publish them here. If the dialogue this time is anywhere near as rich as last week, this should be fantastic.

Here's our topic: How do you feel about spanking rituals? Do you employ any in your relationship? If so, please describe them.

I now yield the floor to you, my dear readers.


Roper said...

The most important part of the ritual is talking to her. If it's a punishment spanking (very rare) then she needs an explanation of what she's done wrong, and she needs to acknowledge that the spanking is deserved. For a fun spanking, I like to sit her on my knee first and explain why Master wants to do this, and why I think it's good for her.

SpankedMinx said...

Hiya Bonnie,
Yep I get a ritual bottom warming on days off together,holidays & birthdays. I also get them when I return from visiting my family, this makes the four hour drive home most enjoyable. When I return home with yet more new clothes & shoes I get spanked everytime. I used to sneak in my purchases & hide them but now leave them out, ready for my hide!

Have a great day!

Luv Minx x x x x

Jeanne said...

Our rituals are probably very common. He pulls me over his knee or his lap, pulls my jeans and panties down first...then makes me wait in anticipation for that first swat. Other times, he will lay his favorite paddles, canes and swatters out on the bed first, then put on cuffs and restraints laying me face down on the bed. Whatever the ritual....I love them all. Nothing is more exciting than being over his knee or across his lap while I am waiting....

Marcus said...

Over the years, I've found some elements that stay with me no matter who I spank. The first is the part "If you do this, young lady, I'm gonna haul you over my knees for a good, sound spanking." I tend to spank in stages. I rarely ever go straight to the bare bottom. Instead, II start with swats over her skirt or pants, then lift the skirt (lowering pants is more difficult, and she ususlly gets a few hard swats for making ME work so hard), then over the panties. Then finally I go for bare skin. I like to make the lady count (seems to drive them nuts). I especially do this when I use spanking implements.

Lots of rituals.

SmartNnaughty said...

Rituals are something I want more of. MG and I haven't established very many and I find it difficult to get into the spanking without the rituals.

We have established some just because he has spanked me a number of times. When I see him sitting patiently on the edge of the bed, I think spanking even if that isn't what we are doing. I feel the urge to go and lay across his knee.

The only other ritual we have is one I have started. When it is time, I go and kneel before him while he is sitting on the bed. I am trying to show him respect by doing this. To keep him from playing with my breasts, I usually take his hands in mine. Then I ask him if he really needs to spank me.

I am sure we will develop more rituals---at least I hope so!


Danielle said...

Hi Bonnie,
We're using the well known rituals, you've written about in a tutorial. But have some extra to add to:
* Getting a drink from the small bottle beside our bed.
* Admiring the result in the mirror.
The first one is needed because of all my oh's and aah's. The second, he loves me to share how well he did the job.

Mike said...

We really don't have any rituals. There are elements that we each like, like how bottoms get bared, but we don't repeat them every time. I think the one of the biggest aspects of a ritual is to build anticipation. You've been through this process before, you know where it is going without question, even if the destination is a little different, the ritual is what links one event to a past one.

So not sure we ar really going to start any, but I certainly see where they fit in.

Paul said...

Hi Bonnie,
I think rituals are an affirmation of life, the other animals do it, pair bonding, mating, nest or den building all have their rituals.
Humans do it all the time and to me it seems to serve the same purpose.
Whenever I passed Mel I would caress her butt, a silent I love you, she used to wake me with a kiss another I love you.
We had a ritual to tell her that she'd earned a GG spanking, this very often. Attitude adjustments a different ritual this included warnings this happened two perhaps three times a month. Punishments, very rare, I hated them and Mel wasn't to keen either, never in the bedroom always in the office.
Then we had the rituals of comfort, forgiveness and closure.
So much of our life is accomplished
by rituals that we are hardly aware of, yet when someone neglects them we feel put out or irritated.
I feel that our common rituals as spanko's may well knit us together as a loose knit family or clan.
Someone pass the coffee and a scone please.

Anonymous said...

I never actually considered them as rituals until reading your blog, but now I most definitely do!!!

First, we begin with an all-over body massage (for both of us!) Then we review my "Reasons I Should Be Spanked List!" Though we don't use spanking for discipline, this list can be "naughty" things, but most of the time it simply has "good-girl" things on it since we consider spankings as rewards for "good behavior!!!" Then my hubby gets out the implement or implements he will be using!!! After that, he guides me over his lap, and from there...well, you get the idea!!! *grin*


cuddlybum said...

We don't really have that many rituals. My darling tells me in his 'stern, authoritive, you're in trouble' voice to go get whichever implement he wants to use on me. he generally pulls down my pants and bares my ass himself, he rarely passes my bum by without swatting it, or caressing it in some way. We ALWAYS cuddle and hug after wards. If its a punishment spanking, I get told why I'm being spanked before and after and told the slate's wiped clean afterwards. If I'm stressed we talk a little about why I'm stressed and what we'll do to make it better, or me better able to cope.......

Kinda a lot of ritual type things there. most of them we do without even thinking about them, they're part of what we do.

Off to savour his company for the last few hours before he goes back to work now.


Lee said...

Not ever having had a relationship, I've never had any rituals. I do know myself enough to know, however, that I don't think I'd appreciate set in stone, we do this everytime, or close to every time rituals. That's not to be confused with certain elements that I like to see often, but I'm a pretty spontaneous gal, and ritual would make things more predictable.

Tom said...

Always there's anticipation as a ritual and with that the same kind of things other people do too. But special to our spanking ritual is that when the spanking is a "good girl" the target is on my left hand side for obvious reasons.In case of a punishment the exposed bum is on my right hand side.

Raheretic said...

My all time favorite ritual is having the bottom partner go out and select a predetermined number of switches for her to be whipped with. She is paddled throroughly before she goes out on her switch hunting expedition so that she is already smarting while she selects her switches. I make it clear that if any of the switches selected are unacceptable, the unasccpetable switch will be used on her until it's used up and then she will be required to go out and find two acceptable ones in it's place. Once the switches are accepted by me, she is instructed by me to prepare them into switch rods by binding three switches together. She is then to soak them in warm bath water and check on them every fifteen minutes to keep the water adequately warm etc. for a few hours until the appointed time for her switching arrives. Then she undresses and selects the first switch to be used on her and brings it to me. She is then firmly retrained, thoroughly paddled, and then all the switch rods are applied to her bottom until they are used up.

I've only found partners with whom I could actuialize this (or most of this ritual)eight times, but each of them has been unbelievably delicious for me. Alas, it is rare for me to identify women who want to have this be more than a once in a lifetime experience.

All the best:)


Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined.

pamela said...

Regarding Tom's ritual: I find that extremely tantilizing to read! I love the switch. I love being told to cut my own switch(es), sometimes being required to peel and sand them. We've never combined them though. I assume soaking them makes them heavier, more thud(?) Having to pick the switch with an already stinging bottom sounds yummy. I have some really delicious memories of impromptu switchings while exploring nature. Ok, I have a serious craving for a good switch whipping now. Maybe hubby will find one waiting for him to use on me. An invitation of sorts. ;)

Anonymous said...

We only have rituals for BG spankings. For these I am told I will get a spanking and to get ready. This mean all make up off, hair in a braid -it's very long down to my middle back, panties down waiting in the corner. He decides how long i wait and what to use. He calls me over to him and places me over his knee/lap. all spankings start over his knee. Also all spanking start and finish with his hand. That means that I get warmed up by his hand, he decides what to use in additiona and than before the spanking is over I get another dose of his hand. It is possible to have a hand spanking, the use of one or more spanking toys and than another hand spanking. Generally there is no resting in between. After the last hand spankign I have to go stand back in the corner untl he tlls me I can get out. After which we hugg kiss or have sex.

Another one of our rituals is that the razor strop is saved only for really bad things. This strop is very old was his grandfathers and used on every females behind int the family including my mother in law.

For a good girl spanking or one that I ask for I can chose what is used but he still determines how long and how hard. Which is fine with me. We always end good girl spankigns with the best sex ever and at times have started all over again.

He also can decide that it's time for a good gril spanking and than he choses. One time he decided that my hairbrush would make a great gg spanking toy I have to tell you that I will always rememeber that spanking because it was the most intense and wonderful spanking I got from something s evil as the hairbrush.

Rituals are important for us because it sets the tone and lets me ow that this is time is different than another time I spend with my husband


IntricatePieces said...

Oh my, I think rituals are one of the yummiest parts of the whole lifestyle. Master and I have several rituals established and they make me feel both secure and wrapped in Masters love even if he has to be away. In regards to spanking if it is a “fun” spanking anything goes and there are no set boundaries that tie us into anything specific other then the fact that he often makes me beg for it to continue… yum!

As for punishment spankings that Master takes a more formal approach to and the ritual is always the same and goes something as follows… I strip, retrieve the implement he requests and kneel before him acknowledging my failure and ask for his correction. Once my “sentence” is passed Master will tell me to "make the offer" then I am to kiss the ground inches before his feet, kneel up right and kiss the implement, then present it to him in both your hands above my head. At no time during this process are my eyes to leave the floor. Then he will tell me the position he wants me to assume and the spanking commences… This is typically followed by his hug and forgiveness :-)

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