Monday, January 02, 2006

Ten Incorrect Gift Responses

My dear husband gave me a leather paddle as a Christmas gift. After several rigorous tests, I can report that it works very well. In fact, I am quite pleased with his selection.

When he gave it to me, though, my response was one I wanted to take back as soon as I said it. While I removed the wrapping paper, I muttered, "So I suppose you're going to beat me with my own present." Oops.

Needless to say, beat me he did. The only saving grace was that I really enjoy the warm sting generated by the new paddle.

This episode inspired me to create a list of ill-advised responses when recieving a new spanking implement (especially when it is clearly intended for use on your own bottom). As a public service, I present the following gift-getter gaffes:

  1. What's this wimpy thing?

  2. Didn't you break one of these last year?

  3. There's no way you're using this thing on me!

  4. Who's butt is this supposed to be for?

  5. If it's my paddle, do I get to swing it?

  6. It's too big. It won't work.

  7. What were you thinking?

  8. This won't hurt at all.

  9. Do you use this thing for spanking?

  10. A flyswatter?

Friends, just erase these from your vocabulary. Believe me. You don't want to go there. Just stick with "Thank you."



Anonymous said...

Love the paddle!!! We have on that looks just like it and my hubby warms my bottom with it quite nicely!!!


tboneslagirl said...

Now you tell me too erase these from my memory banks, thanks.. LOL

My My how I always open mouth and insert foot at times

Happy New Year

jade said...

Thank you! Maybe I'll keep these in mind instead of smarting off about new year's resolutions! ;-)

wind walker said...

thanks for the tip...!! lol!

i made blunders like that before...okay, mostly on purpose...

Bonnie said...

Tigger - Isn't it sweet?

LA Girl - Yeah, me too!

Jade - At least this time, I'm helping instead of hurting!

Wind - In that case, please feel free to use any line you please with my warmest regards. :)

Edward said...

I think you do want to"go there" or you'de not say such things!!W.E.G.

little one said...

I just had to laugh when I read this Bonnie! Too funny! Hope you had a good New Year. Thanks for all you share with us and for all your hard work.

Storm Rider said...

LMAO!! Thats great Bonnie, Wind has actually come up with at least one of those and Im quite sure she WILL manage to try the rest!
I like the paddle by the way! Randy has great tastes! Hell , he married you didnt he!

Jo aka SeaRabbit said...

Oh, yes... you made me laugh too... and this is also my kind of comments...LOLOLOL... but I'm not sure I can change that...;-)

Bonnie said...

Edward - Hmmm... I suppose it's possible. ;)

Little - Thanks. I'm glad you liked it!

Storm - If I haven't said them all, it only because I caught myself in mid-sentence. It is a nice paddle. It generates a warm, stingy pink glow.

Sea - :D Yeah, me too. But I figured I'd post the list anyway as a public service.

rivka said...

LOL.. I'm the queen of provocation, so I'm sure I've hit on a few of those in different words - if not the exact same. *g* Cute, cute, cute.

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