Saturday, March 14, 2020

So Don’t You Feel… ?

I have received many messages over the years, mostly from women, inquiring about my status as a spanked wife.

      Don’t you feel ashamed that you husband spanks you like a child?

      Don’t you feel embarrassed that someone might find out?

      Don’t you feel humiliated to be subjected to corporal punishment?

      Don’t you feel degraded to be used in this way?

      Don’t you feel like marital spanking lowers the status of women?

      Don’t you feel angry that your husband hurts you for his own pleasure?

My answers are, respectively, no, no, no, no, no, and no. And emphatically no. Either I don’t convey my feelings well in writing or some people cannot read the feelings expressed in my words. In either case, no!

I’m a spanko, OK? I’m into it. Like totally into it. Randy is not a monster. If I didn’t like spankings, we wouldn’t do it. And I love it. Love, love, love.

I am proud of who and what I am. It’s a preference, but it’s more than that. It’s part of my identity. I’m a woman, a wife, a mother, a grandmother, a writer, and a spanko. To separate myself from that one element of my life would be to deny my own nature.

I am a fully consenting, willing participant in every spanking session. Yes, of course it hurts. Sometimes, it feels like maybe more than I think I want. Those are the best parts. Randy and I are intimate partners. Spankings and the adult fun that follows are a part of how we demonstrate our love and mutual commitment. So we’re going to keep on spanking regardless of what anyone else thinks.

That's how I feel.

I hope that all my lovely readers are somewhere safe and staying healthy. We must now support each other from afar, and that support is more important than ever.


wolfman7446 said...


Well said!!


Roz said...

Hi Bonnie,

I agree, very well said. These questions must come from people who just don't understand the lifestyle and how it is a part of us and how it, in fact, enriches our lives.

Stay safe!


morningstar said...

nodding furiously.......... I can identify with this.. as I am sure so many others involved in spanking do......

Windy said...

Bonnie, you do convey your feelings in writing quite well, and there has never been any confusion on my part when reading your blog even before I started blogging. Happy for you to have a satisfying spanking and intimate life with Randy! Hugs, Windy

Fondles said...

Hear hear! stay safe. sending best wishes to you and yours too!

Rich Person said...

I would be surprised if it didn't add to your self-esteem, because you decided what you wanted and made it happen. I don't look down on any of my partners for what they've done. I value them for sharing that part of themselves. It's risky and requires courage.

And you took the added step of writing about it and opening up a public discussion. If these people understood that the way I think we in the community do, they would admire you on both counts.

Erica Scott said...

Keep fighting the good fight, sister. Someday, maybe more people will understand. We do.
And take good care of yourself.

Hermione said...

Well said, Bonnie. The best thing about spanking during these frightening times is that you must self-isolate while doing it (unless you are an exhibitionist) so you are staying safe.


PK said...

Sorry to be late. I agree, with everything you said, and the fact that evidently people can't read! We ENJOY spanking. Most of us spend years asking for more than we getting! None of us are recruiting, just expressing out joy!

Bonnie said...

Rick - Thank you!

Roz - No, they don't understand at all. They are worried for my safety and well being. They really needn't be. I am not abused or brainwashed or suffering from Stockholm syndrome. They have a difficult time accepting that there are people who just simply like to be spanked on the bottom. And I am one of them. And a noisy one at that! :)

MS - Yes, this is just who I am.

Windy - Randy and I are fortunate to have found each other relatively early in life and discovered this thing that almost didn't have a name back then.

Fondles - Thank you. You too!

RP - Yes, there is an element of that I think. I feel empowered and emboldened by my ability to accept and sometimes even invite hard spankings. These experiences provide me with a secret edge. I know I am tough, and not just the skin on my bottom. I know I can handle whatever may come.

Erica - Thank you, my friend. Let's fight this one together.

Hermione - I am fortunate to not be alone in my isolation. I've just been told that daily spankings will improve my immune system. I don't think I believe that, but in the name of science, I will cooperate.

PK - Thanks! I'm convinced that some people don't read at all, especially on Fetlife. I would publish a new mailbag post, but it's just too depressing for today's world. I hope your procedure goes well.

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