Do you ever feel as though the spankings you give or receive have become repetitive or follow a common pattern? What techniques would you recommend to introduce some variety into spanking sessions?
As always, everyone is welcome to join in our discussion. All it takes is an opinion stated in the form of a comment below. At the conclusion of the weekend, I will post an edited summary.
26 comments :
I am not at the point where a spanking seems repetitive. I am lucky because I play with many friends both as a top and a bottom so I have a lot of variety when I play.
I like to try different implements when I spank and also vary the cadence of my spanks. Also, I enjoy setting up the spankings with emails or chat room comments.As a bottom, I am never bored, on the contrary, I "enjoy" every moment.
Excellent question.
Hug,
joey
I wish we were spanking regularly enough that it felt repetitive ... or even common. Right now we introduce variety by trying a new implement. Because my Hubby is too practical (or cheap, but you didn't hear me say that) we use common every day tools, so when one of us finds something we think would make a good spanking implement we lay it on the bed for the other one to find. So far it's been rulers (wooden and varying thicknesses of plastic), hangers, belts, wooden spoons of different sizes, a remote control, a spatula, and a paint stick. I suppose we'll eventually graduate to more well crafted tools. I can't see when we'll actually do this with enough regularity that we'll need to spice it up. Every time is still spicy for us.
I wish that my spankings would happen often enough for repetitiveness to become an issue.
But for those who do, why not try a bit of amateur dramatics to create a bit of variety. There are thousands of scenarios that people can have a go at and the acting does not have to be of the highest quality, as there is no audience. Unless you want an audience that is :)
Prefectdt
I recommend changing lovers frequently (just kidding). Spanking is always such a rush, even if we did it the exact same way every time (and we vary role-playing, positions, implements...), it'd still be fresh and fantastic.
Jean Marie
Ummm.....yes can become rote and that usually ends up causing trouble. I think that erotic spanking is a good thing to throw into the mix, not that it happens very often, but it is very nice when it does.
Just my experience and humble opinion.
hugs
lillie
I can see where folks who separate spanking and sex quite definitively might fall into a rut-although, wouldn't it still hurt? I guess like anything, things can become rote. Life can't be all spicy (which is really too bad!) I think any really healthy relationship can't afford to let things go stale for long. reading the blogs it seems many HoH's know when they need to change things up. A mere swat, unexpected,delivered with discretion in a busy place sends me into a tizzy
Our spankings seem repetitive, especially now that we are doing 2 weeks straight of role affirmation :( which is NO FUN!
But one could add different implements or have play spankings to mix things up ;)
OR my hubby could let me swat him JUST ONE TIME with our paddle like I've been asking. Only so he knows kinda what it feels like! I'm positive I couldn't smack him as hard as he gets me.
His process (?) is always the same. It just has a varied intensity or lecture attached.. :) the repetition doesn't bother me. It helps me know what to expect.
JJ generally uses about 5 implements in every spanking. He often picks a couple of the usual, but the rest are different, so that alone brings suspense to the spanking. Occasionally we have had spanking "fortune cookies" or lotto tickets (or something homemade like coupons) that adds a little spice. I think it's fun to draw my fate until I pull out one that says "25 with the belt" then it gets a little scary.
We haven't been at this long enough to feel that the spankings are routine or repetitive. We are still varying the circumstances, severity, and implements. However, if they do become routine, he will have to vary the pace or maybe insert with different activities into longer breaks. Another options would be to try new implements such as the belt. We could also change our position to "leaning over the bed" or "lying on the bed" or change the location to the living room. One day I'd like to try a few swats in the back yard. (It's very private.)
This is still kind of new to us. However, my sweet husband is easily contented with routine, so if I don't suggest something new every once in awhile, it can feel repetitive to me.
We're talking about trying a paddle. I hope it's soon...I think. :)
Too new at this yet. The only repetitive motion around here is his arm swinging. Bea
mybeahind.wordpress.com
Having been regularly punished by my Mistress for over 10 years you might think that it would have become boring by now. In fact nothing could be further from the truth, I still look forward to each occasion with a feeling of excitement and anticipation and during my punishment I feel the same thrill as I did the very first time. Of course their are similarities and routines but they are part of the fun. Also she will frequently introduce things that we do less regularly and others that are entirely new. Things like occasional bondage, costumes, punishment (and display) in front of witnesses and other experiences which I never dreamed of when I first meet her. All of which would probably not happened if it wasn't for the fact that not only is she a kind and sensitive woman (except when actually punishing me) she is good company and fun to be with and I trust her completely.
If the spankee is exhibitionist and if the Spanker is a bit voyeuristic. I recommend having a session with other people. Maybe a curious friend!, He can participate or not, as approved by stakeholders.
After more than two years of BDSM relationship. Enzo and I, decided to add a third person in the spanking sessions. Not always! Only in some occasions. And we were able to experience new sensations. Very pleasant to both.
Most people find great comfort in familiarity, so if my spanking them may seem "repetitive" or "follow a common pattern".....no one seems to be objecting! :-)
Dr. Ken
With my D in the house, there is nothing routine about our spanko life. I never know when the lure of my ripe bottom is going to put the poor thing in the firing line, and there is often little warning , before it happens. Nor do I know if it is going to be just a hand spanking, which is my favorite, a session with any one of our many implements, or a swishing with the cane, which stings like hell, but I still accept. Then there is his choice of on clothes, on knickers, or bare bottom. Finally position; draped over his knee, which we both like, touching toes, bent over bit of furniture, prone on a bed, or the one I don't like, but D does, the diaper pose. For many of these, I am also tied in position, which adds to the thrill. There are so many variations and combinations that my spankings can never be described as repetitive... S.
That's a topic that I have also wondered about from time to time. My husband is a big fan of routine, so most of our spankings follow the same general pattern. We use a different set of implements each time, and that provides the variety. Once the spanking starts, I forget that we've done it the same way hundreds of times before and immerse myself in the pleasure and pain of the moment.
I like my paddling's the same ole way. Like a favorite comfortable pair of pants. Bacall likes variety. Different positions, different rooms, trips to the woodshed, outdoors, different toys, bondage. She is not shy about telling me what will work for her today. That's something not many bottoms will do as they require the top to make all decisions.
Sometimes we break the pattern with spanking games. Examples include deck of cards... number of swats match number on card and color and type match to implement... queen of hearts might mean 10 swats using cane in prone position. I also just downloaded a random number generator app for my phone... that will be fun... you choose the top and bottom numbers and random number will be generated from within that range. I will ask her to determine the number and pick the devise so I will be surprised....
houston_switch
We for sure have a rhythm for the more serious spankings. But we usually don't set a number or anything, he just goes until he sees fit. For the less serious spankings it's usually all over the place, often with giggles and banter in between. All depends on the mood, I guess.
The top I see most frequently is pretty good at changing things up a bit from time to time. But I find familiarity comforting and hate change, so wouldn't complain about a little repetition.
My wife and I are currently practicing nightly maintenance spankings, so the risk of becoming repetitive is high. To keep things fresh, I switch out implements, locations and scenarios. One night might be a simple OTK with my bare hand on a dining room chair, and the next might be bound, standing, and using a switch. It's also fun to create a bit of anticipation by selecting the outfit my wife will wear and having her change into it before we start. We've had a run on babydoll nightgowns lately...
mmm, when it begins to diminish the pleasure, I recommend increasing the spank intensity. Increased physical challenge for submissive spankee and dominant spanker will be focus on the techniques and discipline assurances.
At least keep the game open for a little longer! When the intensity reaches its limit (Because there must be one, may have been a long time). Then... I don't know
Mr. Wanton here:
I try to vary things over the knee, standing, on her knees. The consistency for the most part is in a general progression from lighter to firmer strokes, then usually tapering.
We have been doing this for a long time and athough Nina has her favorite paddle that she will always use, she adds variety by sometimes including multiple spanking implements, role play, or games. She will also spank me in different positions, but almost always finishes OTK.
George
Act out different spanking scenes. Office spankings, such as Secretary. School scenes, such as naughty school-girl. Military, such as capturing a female spy, Domestic scene, depicting naughty housewife. etc, etc, etc.
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