Sunday, March 04, 2012

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Mar 4

Our topic was paying or receiving money to accept or give a spanking. Here are your responses.

Elysia: I have never paid to be spanked. I suppose I was lucky to have found my husband (a great spanker) before I ever considered taking this route. I would have if I didn't know him, as my spanking needs were never something I could ignore. This need in many of us is so great that I don't think watching spankings or reading about them would ever satisfy a true spanko's needs. I think it's great that other spankos have so many avenues to pursue their interest with like-minded souls. There are blogs, forums, chat rooms, services munches, etc. I think it's a great time to be a spanko. Precautions are the key to safety though, and I wish everyone a safe and satisfying experience.

Wise words indeed

Hermione: I would never consider paying someone to spank me. Spanking is part of the intimate relationship between my husband and me, not just an itch that needs to be scratched. I can understand that for many people, paying for a spanking is a necessity, and it's good that there is that option available. It just isn't for me.

Reece Seever: We have never considered it seriously. I once played with the notion of suggesting it to Anne. She had an injury that prevented her from using spanking to discipline me when I definitely deserved it. In the end, it did not seem like something that either of us would be into, and it seemed to be fraught with relationship risks.

Abby: Until now, I have not had to, so no. Also, I feel that spanking creates a connection, and is intimate, so I'm not sure I would. I know that some do, and I say go for it.

Curtis G: I never have and never will.

Ana: I did consider it once or twice, but safety is such an issue that I don't think I would ever do it. That and the expense, of course. The problem with a long-distance relationship is that sometimes I sooner than is possible.

Sublime Wifey: I have not paid to spank or be spanked. However, I'm working on a piece of fiction right now in which one of my characters is going to be paid by the other to submit to a spanking. I'm trying to figure out how I'm going to write it. The spanker needs a spankee for a bit of performance art and I can't quite decide how the exchange will happen or how the relationship will develop from there. I have a start and I know where I want them to go, but not how they'll get there. Perhaps someone's response here will help me work out the details.

Kaelah: Since Ludwig and I sometimes take a look behind the scenes of spanking video productions, I have asked myself whether it would be okay to be paid for a spanking shoot. Due to various reasons, I have decided that I want to keep all spanking-related activities strictly non-profit.

I don't have any problem with people getting paid for spanking shoots or private sessions, it is just that not being paid gives me the feeling of freedom that I need. I don't want to feel like a paid employee in such a personal context. Of course, I don't mind for example to be taken for dinner after a shoot or to be given a room to stay overnight. But that just reduces Ludwig's and my costs and doesn't mean that we are making any profit.

I don't want to earn money with spanking. That way it remains something purely personal and intimate, a part of my sexuality with my partner and an outlet for creativity when it comes to blogging, taking pictures, publishing free private clips and looking behind the scenes of spanking shoots.

Prefectdt: I've never been paid for receiving, but I have paid to be spanked on many occasions. Personally, I do not see any difference between doing this and paying for a non-sexual massage. If I could afford it, I would happily pay to get spanked at least once a month. But at up to 200 Euros an hour, it is just too expensive to do on a regular basis. I expect a pro spanker to be highly experienced and competent for that kind of cash. The benefit is that you get spanked by women who are very good at what they do.

Mick: No, but a couple of times, when we first started, I negotiated a barter by offering to clean the kitchen as long as I got to spank Lynda after I was done.

Riley: Sometimes I'm spanked to pay for something I've done, does that count? jk ;)

No, I would never pay for a spanking or be paid to endure one. For me, spankings are less about the physical pain and more about the sense of connection and intimacy involved. It takes a lot for me to submit. It has to be to somebody who wants me for me and not for money.

Jean Marie: I never have and never would pay or accept pay for something so serious and sacred, so intimate and important to me.

But a former boyfriend told me about his three experiences at a place called the Chateau. Each time he paid for an hour and spanked a different professional submissive. Each girl told him afterward that most men talked and flirted and spanked. My former lover just spanked, non-stop for the full hour. They referred to him, he proudly told me, as The Maniac. He told me that he'd never paid for sex with a woman in his life, but loved going there to spank to his heart's content with no strings attached.

morningstar: I have never paid or been paid for spanking. I need to have some sort of connection to fully enjoy the spanking. That's something that I don't think I would find in a pay per spank agreement.

Would I ever pay? No, I don't think so. I am such an "uppity" sub (cheeky grin) that I am sure, if necessary, I could find someone more than willing to spank me. :)

Dave: I have never paid for a spanking, but if I weri not In a spanking relationship, I would definitely consider it. I love to have my lady spank me. I have considered going to a pro together so she could get some pointers on spanking me and other men. I would love to watch her spank another guy, so if she can learn from another spanking lady that would be a good thing.

Make Mine Red: No, I never have and I wouldn't consider it. Our spankings are strictly foreplay and a huge turn on, so it just wouldn't be the same. Like others have said, it's just too intimate.

MarQe: I make no secret about paying to spank, and on occasion, to be spanked. I have no alternative and scratching 'that itch' is impossible otherwise due to difficult circumstances at home. I have had many wonderful experiences and made some lovely friends also.

Michael: I have never paid or been paid to spank somebody. My wife, Season, has never paid or been paid to be spanked. Hermione summed it up best for me, spanking is an intimate relationship between me and Season. However, I am very glad that the pay scenario is available for those who wish to partake.

Wordsmith: Definitely not! I would not consider it for a moment. Not even if you sent AJR around wearing her cutest shorts (perhaps you need to try that one, just so we can all be sure?).

Spanky: You can add me to the list of others who have not paid to spank or be spanked. While I can imagine a few people I would pay to spank (if you read my blog you can guess who they are), it will never happen. I certainly wouldn't pay to be spanked, as I'm not wild about getting spanked for free.

Ronnie: No, I have never paid or even considered it. There's nothing wrong in paying for a spanking, it just isn't for me. Spanking is something I could only do with P.

Poppy: If I paid someone to spank me, the dynamic would be all wrong. I would feel that I was not only in control, but also not the kind of girl that a man wanted to spank for his own pleasure. That would rip me up.

I struggle with authority anyway and if I was in charge for a spanking, it would ruin it for me and feel like an attack- shudder. I am not saying this is how it would be for anyone else. I think we each have our own dynamic and I respect that this issue will be different for others.

Correction Man: I personally have never had to take the route you mention, but I have attended to females bottoms over my numerous years .Some were by willing consent while others were by pure chance and instinct. Deep down in certain females there seems to be a desire that will openly provoke matters to bring this about. There is something deep and satisfying when delivering a sound bare bottomed OTK hand spanking to a deserving female. In many cases, it establishes a strong connection between both parties.

Jai: Unless one would consider paying to attend a spanking party, then no, I have never "paid to play." I am a young, female bottom in the scene, so I have never really been at a loss for partners or people willing to scene with me. I am lucky enough to be involved in a long distance D/s relationship and a local mentorship program. So no, I have never had to pay to get my needs or wants met.

I have no problem with people who do go that route though.

Cleo: I work as a pro spankee and I started doing it because I was sick of men saying they wanted a submissive when they actually only wanted a bottom to spank. I was looking for a LTR. They were looking for a bottom. So I decided to give them what they wanted, if they paid for it.

I keep my personal spanking very separate from my business side. One is fun and lighthearted (business) whereas my personal spankings are much more about submission.

Adriane Greeneyez: I have never paid to be spanked, and would not consider doing so at this time. These days, I know how to get it for free. ^_^ Also, I want my spankings to come from someone with whom I have a personal relationship, as opposed to a spanker for hire business arrangement. I want the spanker to care about me in a personal way.

However, I would have been willing to pay just to try it before I started playing. I was still trying to figure out "OK, I know what I want. How the heck do I get me some of THAT?" I needed to scratch an itch that had been driving me crazy for such a long time. I can certainly see the appeal of paying for a session. Going for a long time without being spanked sucks. If it's just a one time thing to get it out of your system, a professional would be a safe choice I suppose.

Bonnie: The short answer is no. I have never had a need to pay or be paid for being spanked.

With that said, I can imagine scenarios where my younger self might have considered work as a spanking model were it offered to me back then. It's fun to ponder wonder what I would have done, though I really don't know.

Thank you all for joining our brunch celebration. I hope you will join us again next weekend.


sixofthebest said...

Dear Bonnie, here is an interesting question, you might wish to ask your yourself, and all other 'spanking enthusiasts'. If you owned a Television Channel, called SPANKING TV. with a (24 hour service) What programs, related to 'spankings', would you show. Such as movies, news, quiz shows, sports, etc.

Bonnie said...

Six - Here's our line-up. :)

Anonymous said...

Your Brunch question has had me thinking about the topic ever since I posted Saturday morning. I've been fantasizing about being a professional spankee. (Of course, fantasies only deal with the hot, positive aspects, not the downside.) Then, to see your & Cleo's comments added fuel to the fire...
Jean Marie

A-Non said...

Sorry I missed the Brunch this weekend. I have never paid (seems most women have not), but I have had experiences with non-boyfriends. I guess that is just a case of "I want this, and you want to do it." Can be great with an experienced partner. Both people get what they want. But it is better in a LTR.

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