Sunday, January 30, 2011

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Jan 30

Our topic of the week was saying ”Uncle.” Here are your thoughts.

Xantu: Saying uncle? A competition to see who is tougher or more determined? I don't see our dynamic working that way. He either doles out the spanking, deliberately leaving me wanting more or starts out with such shocking immediate intensity that I find myself scrambling and struggling to escape at the first strike.

I suspect if spanking was couched in this "til she cries uncle" format, he would choose the latter technique and I would be squealing uncle like a little girl within seconds. I also suspect that he would not stop.

So I think I will keep this little game out of our conversations for the time being.

Daisy: Yes, we've done this a couple of times, when I had tried to "top from the bottom" or really displeased him in some other way. He spanked and spanked, and I bore it stoically, knowing that I deserved it. .I wanted to say the safe word, but I was either too stubborn or too aware that I had deserved all he wanted to dish out. Then he said quietly, "This will continue indefinitely. You know how to stop it, whenever you are ready." This was the point when I realised that he was going to continue, all night if necessary, until I said the safe word. Dammit. If he had told me 200 spanks earlier, I could have stopped it a lot sooner. LOL!

I almost never say the safe word. I would never abuse his trust that way. I never say it when I am too angry to be spanked or anything like that. It is there for a reason, and abuse of that reason ruins the dynamic and cheats the whole relationship.

Hermione: Yes, we have done that, as I described here, and I did refuse to give in. I prefer Ron to be the one in control of when to start and stop and everything in between.

Pink: Aside from spanking me until I'm practically limp and floating in a different plane, we don't play those sorts of games.

When he's spanking me, he's in control and he reads me very well. While it sounds like a fun game in theory, I think I would cry 'uncle' a whole lot sooner than what either of us truly want. I guess I'm not that stubborn! You win! You win! (But don't stop spanking!)

Michelle Carlyle: Hubby almost always spanks me until I say, "Okay!" Then he gives me a few extra. But since we mainly engage in spanking for sexual purposes, usually the "Okay!" comes after I climax.

Michael: Season and I have not played this game. As with Hermione and Pink, Season has no control over the type or duration of the spanking unless she uses her safe word. We have played Red Light, Green Light to test and stretch her limits. This was suggested by our good friend cj and we have done it a few times. I spank Season harder, faster and longer than I normally would and she tells me when to slow (yellow light) stop (red light) and continue (green light). Makes for a fun way to gauge her reactions and know how far to go during other more spontaneous spankings.

Make Mine Red: We haven't. But then, he usually stops much sooner than I want him to. I can take more than he thinks I can! I often think I would like to try it though :)

RosieBee: Here is how it usually goes for us... He administers one smack and I start to complain and fight and insist he stop. In other words, I do everything I can think of immediately outside of saying our safe word. In turn, he ignores my demands and complaints holds me down and spanks me harder for being such a pain in the butt (HUH, that's a good one. I'M being the pain in the butt). Anyway, I do come to the point where I realize that I can't stop it. I then finally submit and shortly after, he stops. The end result is that warm, blissful, content, wonderful after play glow that I am so addicted to. So, for now, I would have to say no, I do not think that would work for us. I would cry "uncle" after the first smack and end up disappointed and mad at myself for being such a wimp. ;)

Anne: We have a safe word that I can use. I prefer not to say it though. I much prefer to let him decide the when, where, and how many for any spanking he administers to me. If i do use it, he goes a little further before he puts the paddle, or whatever, aside and we cuddle.

I do like the red light-green light though. I might suggest it. :-)

Raven Red: I'm with Michael, Pink and Hermione on this one.

He understands how my mind works, and he knows that the results of a proper spanking are more a need than a want for me.

He is in full control the whole time and monitors my reactions accordingly. He knows when I reach that point where the psychological part of the spanking breaks through - and that is when he stops.

Our Bottoms Burn: I don't see "game" in the question. But reading the replies, I must be wrong as so many do.

I have known women who had no limits that they would admit. Some of the responses here indicate that more than a few readers are of the same mind. Before I die I hope to understand the mind set behind that.

The only thing I can figure is that by not willing to give in to the pain, say Uncle, they risk changing the dynamic that the man is in charge.

Burl: My Disciplinarian makes all the decisions. I cannot imagine the scenario where I would ask for the session to end.

Prefectdt: No I have never done that and cannot really see the appeal of a competitive spanking. Having said that, I might be tempted to try one, if one where offered, as you never know if something is for you or not unless you actually try it.

Indy: My regular spanking partner and I did something along those lines once. In the end, it was too hard for him to psych himself up to spank me that hard and he didn't actually make me safeword. I was fairly stubborn about meeting the challenge . We made it through quite a few implements before I called it off. I was a little disappointed that he didn't make me safeword, as I felt in control of the proceedings most of the time, even though he was choosing the implements and spanking me much harder than usual.

In the end, I simply wasn't interested in taking the big wooden paddle he pulled out after several straps and a couple of canes. So said I was done. Had he forced me to safeword, I would have taken at least the first set, and that would have been rather hot, if more than a little painful.

Anon: Like most above, we have not tried this and likely would not. First, I am stubborn to the point of self-destructiveness and generally, I am implicitly topping from the bottom. She is too kind and gentle to get very far on this road. Finally, we do this as great adult play for pleasure and sex, even though there is some very hard spanking involved. So we do have our game, but with different parameters.

Am I the only male recipient in the place?

Welcome Anon. There are several other male spankees here at brunch including Burl, Prefectdt, and sometimes, Bogey.

Kingspan: I have sometimes played (on both sides) a type of power sharing game where the bottom is given a spanking and then asked to say they are sorry for whatever real or imagined offense they have committed. If they refuse, they are given another spanking. This can go on for many rounds. The thing is, the top is in control of how long and hard that next spanking will be, so you don't know whether you will have to take five spanks or fifty before you get another chance to say you're sorry.

Bonnie: Randy and I have attempted this sort of play before, but it doesn't work for us as well as our usual dynamic (where he spanks as he sees fit). If it's a competition, then I feel as though I can't, or at least shouldn't, give up. Typically, my bottom gives out before my will does. The result is basically a stalemate.

The trouble with this scheme for me is that it lacks the delicious element of submission. I don't want to decide when the spanking ends. When I take everything he chooses to give me, it puts me in a great headspace. I am at peace, connected to my husband, and ready for whatever is to follow.

Thanks, everyone, for sharing your thoughts and experiences with us. Next week, I will unveil the first of our classic brunch questions.

1 comment :

sixofthebest said...

Thank you Bonnie, for serving up a nice plate of fish and chips. Thats yummy all the way. Now along with such a delicious plate, I would add some tarter sauce, if you don't mind?. Bon Appetite, Six of the best to you, and I mean very best on your delectable bare bottom.

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