Thanks to everyone who participated in our aftermath poll. Incidentally, I answered yes to all of the questions. Our poll inspired Michael to suggest this excellent follow-up brunch topic.
As a spanker, do you enjoy leaving marks or bruises on your partner's bottom? As a spankee, do you like being marked or bruised, or is having a rosy red bum enough?
To participate in our brunch discussion, all you need to do is enter your answer in the form of a comment below. Once everyone has had their turn, I will post an edited summary.
25 comments :
love the afterglow but also like the marks, like a badge of merit i suppose
Bonnie, glad you thought the question was worthy. I prefer to just redden Season's bottom, though I must confess I try for fire engine red or maybe candy apple red would be a more fitting description. I don't mind leaving a few marks when I use just my hand which in our case are usually deep red spots just on the verge of bruising, but I don't like leaving black & blue or purple bruises, and especially NEVER to break the skin like you see in many canings. While I know many people enjoy this and take pride in leaving and receiving marks, and that is what drives TTWD - our unique individual preferences and willingness to accept all viewpoints in our community - I prefer not to leave bruises. Season is of the same mind so we match up perfectly on this matter.
I don't like seeing bruises or purple marks, it has happened in the past but we worked on avoiding them. I know my husband doesn't like them either, he has apologized a few times when it happened in the beginning. Sometimes it is a bit pink or a little marking the next day or so which is ok. I don't like seeing pictures or videos or reading anything that shows a lot of brusing or welts, that is not what we do.
Great suggestion, Michael!
Although it is certainly a matter of preference, D and I aren't overly fond of excessive marking. I'm not sure how he does it -- he has quite the technique -- but he manages to usually avoid any bruising at all, despite my fair skin and tendency to mark. (Not for lack of spanking hard, mind you.)
He has intentionally left marks twice in our relationship to leave an impression on me that I would not soon forget. He was obviously successful as I clearly recall both the reasons and the ramifications of those occasions and am certain to avoid a repeat. But he would never break skin, which would signify an immediate stop to any play. That's just not our personal style.
Most often, I am a deep shade of pink, a color that can last well into the next day with absolutely no bruising. I like it that way!
I don't pay much attention to the visual results of spanking -- I suspect that may be much more interesting to the spanker. For me it is all about how it feels - physically and emotionally. As Michael said, we prefer a nice even red color without bruises or welts. However, there is a hand-shaped crop he favors that I suspect leaves little red hand marks. :-)
As a spanker, I'm not fond if seeing bruises and marks but I do know that My Fine Lady loves the sensation that can still be felt later. So, it's not my goal to make marks and bruises but more being able to make the sensation last.
As a spankee, I do enjoy being bruised and marked, especially when I can still feal the reminders of the spanking days later. It reminds me of the love My Fine Lady has for me;
It's not her thing she would much rather just receive spankings, but she spanks me because she knows it's what I want and need. For someone who says she doesn't like giving spankings she certainly has gotten to be VERY good at it though.
Bonnie,
As a spankee, I absolutely have to have a bruised bottom to have fully enjoyed the spanking. I just love to see the marks...it actually makes me feel better about myself to have taken such a hard spanking and to be able to see the results! It's also nice having trouble sitting down as it brings back fond memories that make me smile like almost nothing else. :)
We don't like marking or bruising-- a nice red bottom is very good, though!
When I feel I have taken a really really hard spanking, which makes me still sore hours later, I am actually quite disappointed if the marks have disappeared! It makes it look like I was being a wuss 'complaining' ;) that I am still sore, when it doesn't even stay pink....
I am fair skinned but do not mark easily... and a fiery red ass looks white as snow again an hour or two later...SO frustrating, because it is still tender!
So, yes, light bruising is sometimes good; but like many readers, I am not into broken skin and really bad bruising.
In my early days, I used to get some spectacular marks - purple edges of strap marks, dirty yellowish bruising, ridged red cane stripes - and I adored them. I loved having this enduring (for a little while at least) reminder of all the fun I was having, especially when I happened to look in the mirror and catch sight of myself unawares. It gave me a gorgeous lurching, shivery feeling in my belly.
These days, however, my bottom has got so used to being spanked that it seems to have developed amazing powers of regeneration. I might initially have some redness and maybe a few bruises - especially if I've been spanked with something made of wood - but all this fades within minutes, at most hours. Whereas in the past, it wasn't uncommon for me to have marks that were still visible after nearly 2 weeks.
I agree with Daisychain that sometimes you feel like you're making a fuss out of nothing if you get up and see that your bottom is just a bit red, especially if you've just spent the past half an hour shrieking and wriggling and begging for it to stop. It doesn't help when Mr M says 'Look, there's not a mark on you! Now what was all that fuss about??'
Oh well, marks or no marks, it's still loads of fun :-).
I am quite happy to have bruises that persist for a few days after a spanking, but that doesn't happen often. My bottom has become quite resilient over time, and marks are rare. Redness usually fades within an hour.
Ron always watches carefully for any excessive damage. A blister or break in the skin means playtime is over.
Hugs,
Hermione
Some people mark easily, some resist the most extreme efforts. It has little to do with the spanker. Most bottoms relish marks. I don't like to give marks but they happen and for those who want them I make the effort.
I don't mark myself.
I LOVE the marks,Sir does not. So I rarely get marked now. As soon as I start to show a hint of bruising he stops. Here is something I find just a tad weird,he says he doesn't like to see me in pain,he says because he loves me is the reason. Apparently before he loved me it was different. Still wrapping my head around THAT!
I don't mind if I have a few light marks or bruises after, quite like to see them.
Were not into broken skin or very bad bruising. P's very careful about that.
Love,
Ronnie
xx
MMMMM! I've grown to love Sunday mornings... On this one we woke up late, made and ate a lavish brunch, and he wandered back to bed while I got on the computer. Bonnie's question reminded me how much I like marks on my bottom, and how long it'd been since my last hard thrashing.
"Keiter, come here, please," I called.
"Hrmph!"
"It's important," I persisted. He joined me, I pointed out your weekly query, then bent over and let my jammie bottoms fall. "Cane me so that we have the stripes to savor all day, please...?" I implored.
I've got ten very vivid welts burning back there now, and, of course, that lit a fire that only sex could extinguish. Thank you, Bon!
Do other couples find that these weekly questions change the course of your weekend?
Jean Marie
I think of marks as a badge of honor.
Its interesting to note that sometimes it seems she marks me easier than others. But unless there is some evidence the next day, she propably didn't spank hard enough.
Hi Guys … Another interesting question … as a good deal of our plays involve the cane I am always keen to view the results and make sure that all the stripes have landed in the ‘sweet spot’ and there have been no wraparounds, or high or low riders that can cause unnecessary discomfort … of course the cane leaves marks but in all the years I have indulged my caning passion I have never ‘cut’ anybody with a cane and would think that I had failed in making the proper application if I did.
Interestingly MBJ is extremely proud of her pain threshold and her stoicism under fire … when we are playing with other toys such as straps, slippers, hairbrushes and kitchen utensils that allow for more extended sessions MBJ always seems particularly enamored of her very red bum … I never intentionally cause bruising although some darker discoloration can be a natural bi-product of an extended spanking with a wood-backed hairbrush or other toys of the more unyielding variety … Cheers … RH
I don't mind a bruised backside. The bruises are a good reminder. Although, my backside has become quite accustomed to some hard spankings, and I tend to heal very quickly or barely bruise at all.
Katia
I love having a marked and bruised backside, it is just a pity that the marks fade so fast nowadays. Except good strong cane marks they can last for 10 days :)
Prefectdt
JJ says: I do NOT like to see bruises from spanking Kady.
Kady says: Hey, what's a good spanking without battle scars?
If I am going out of town, I esp like to have bruises to keep me connected, so to speak. It's like I still feel his presence when I see the bruises, keeps me feeling his love.
Kady
We both prefer just a nice rosy red. I like to feel heat & I enjoy raised welts. At first I bruised easily & it upset hubby & he wanted to back off of spanking for awhile. I convinced him otherwise & now I think my behind has toughened up because he spanks me a lot harder now but there are never lasting marks!
~Make Mine Red
I love examining my behind in the mirror shortly after a spanking and watching the welts and marks... we usually use a belt and just looking at the welts makes me want to bend over again... : )
I like a nice red bottom. And I like feeling it the next day. It reminds me how much I am loved.
And that makes it all worthwhile.
Char
I mark easily and LOVE to see the results. My hubby hates to see the marks but enjoys the benefits that those marks provide. Lol
dieseldiva
Both I and my wife are dark skinned, so seeing marks on us is sometimes difficult. But, yes, I do love seeing her bottom turn a dark shade of red during a real intense play session from me.
And, when I bottom, I love it when I have that sore feeling that lasts for a few days, as well as the stripes from a good caning. My philosophy is that if you are getting spanked you should at least know that you have been afterwards. That only happened once to me. My 21st birthday at Paddles. Now that is a fond memory!
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