Happy Independence Day weekend to everyone in the US and happy weekend to all our readers. We have a simple, but perhaps not so simple, question contributed by Trish.
Should spankings always have a reason? Why or why not?
There you have it - Short and simple. If you would like to join in the fun, all you need to do is enter your answer in the form of a comment below. Once everyone has spoken, I will post an edited synopsis.
23 comments :
I like it when they have a reason but I am happy (in a please-don't-spank-me-it-huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurts kind of way) when he spanks me because he thinks I need it or we need it or he just thinks he should. I don't like to be spanked but I love that he spanks me and it makes me feel wonderful afterwards. He spanks me every morning when I am with him and he says that is "just because" and it always makes me mad at first but then I just settle down and we have lovely days.
I like them to have a reason if they are to be properly awful but I trust him so much that he thinking that is what should happen is a good reason. Although, don't tell him I said that because I will still pout and say that it is not fair and I don't want it.
Great question. :)
That depends on the relationship. In our case, the only reason for spankings is that I like them, and my husband likes spanking me. Does that count? Oh, yes, another reason is that if I don't get spanked regularly, I sulk. And if it's Sunday, that's a reason, because it's our chosen day for spankings. But I like those spontaneous swats for no reason best of all.
I think 'because I feel like it' is a perfectly good reason =)
I love having a reason for a spanking but like the other any reason will do. Having a reason helps get my mind into it more quickly and make it even more enjoyable for me. Some of the reasons I've suggested to Nick have been for stress relief, not doing the laundry quickly enough, that I just 'need one' or even for not standing and curtsying when he walks in the room. LOL I'm not picky about the reason but I really like having one.
PK
Just because is reason enough as we spank just for fun.
I agree with Hermione; it depends on the dynamic of your relationship.
There is always a reason for me to get one; either because I have been bad, or to remind me to be good, LOL! There are good girl spankings (Nice, with anticipation and tingle factor, and -when we are together-lots of fondling etc...), bad girl ones (yeeeeouchy), brat ones, smartass ones, and just because ones. He always knows when I need one, even though we are so far apart! xxxxxx
It's for me one of the great joys in life, either for sexual reasons, or for punishable reasons. Yes spanking a naughty woman's bare bottom is pure exstacy.
I agree that "because I said so" should be all the reason that's needed. :P
I guess that the only time that a spanking really HAS to have a reason is if it's for discipline/punishment. While others don't practice this form of spanking, I actively do so with those that ask to be held accountable. Even then, an occasional maintenance spanking might have "pre-emptive strike" labeled as the reason.
For playtime spankings, it adds a certain element if there's a "reason" for the spanking. (Often, the word "excuse" might be better than "reason.") For instance, bratting is just for fun, but gives the spanking a "reason" to be dealt out. Roleplay is another situation in which there's a "reason" for the action. (To be truthful, spanking for bratting is a form of roleplay, too, but you're playing yourself. In essence, the character isn't fictional, like a normal roleplay, but the reactions are.)
Though, a good "because I want to" is still good enough for me.
For me, the best (and only real) reason to get spanked is simply because it's the most fun thing in the world. I can't think of anything that I enjoy more than a good play session. But...this is just me.
Hugs,
Cheryl
Yeah just because is one of the many reasons,also being way too bratty,or I need re-centering,or I ask nicely or...well you get the idea!
Sometimes a Spanking comming out of nowhere is an Erotic Treat on its own. Congrats on being Blog of the Month. You earned it. Great Blog.
I also think that no "real" reason is needed. We do it just because we like it. But still, I love it when a reason is "invented".
Tina
No the spanking doesn't have to have a reason for me to enjoy it but there is something very enjoyable about there being a reason for the spanking regardless of whether it is real or made-up because then you can enjoy the role play element of being naughty.
Ken
Happy Fourth of July Bonnie.
I don't think spankings always need a reason but P has often said they do. Even if the reason's a bit contrived he likes to have something there. Me I think I must be a junkie for them any way they come although I have to admit they are better when there's something solid (no pun intended) behind them.
Love,
Ronnie
xx
I like to have a reason why? There have been times my hubby has spanked for, "just because" and "good training." These are more on the playful side.
Katia
Honestly think spankings work better with a reason, because a reason creates a dialogue that allows for the interplay that so many spankos seem to like. Certainly a spanking 'just because' (ie, no reason) does work and we've had lots of those. They're pretty common at spanking parties. "Would you like a spanking"... "yes"... and there you go. And those are fun and do have a place.
But, a spanking for a reason... even if it's a role-play made up one... offers so much more. "We need to have a talk young lady"... "yes sir"... that starts pushing buttons that 'just because' misses.
Happy 4th of July, Bonnie... and thanks for all that you do,
:)
~Todd & Suzy
Reasons are good. Of course 'just because you need it' or 'it's been too long' works too. Spanking for stress relief is a perfectly valid reason and it doesn't have to be that the spankee needs the relief, it can be for the relief of the spanker too.
Spanking offers a connection that to those who aren't involved just can't understand and those of us who are, understand clearly.
I would never say "should" in answer to this or any other similar question, because I'm so stuck on the credo that a BDSM relationship is still at core a relationship and no one else can say what is right for you.
So... I get spanked both for punishment and correction, and because the sadist feels like it. The 2 kinds of spankings feel very different, both physically and emotionally, and I am grateful for both kinds.
I am grateful to be owned by a Master who is willing to work so hard to train me and guide me and enable me to live up to my potential as both a writer and as his treasure. And I am grateful to be allowed to give him the pleasure and relief that he gains by hurting me.
And yes, it does arouse me. Even when I am spanked for punishment, which hurts a whole lot more. He beat me with a hairbrush recently, for the very first time. It hurt like hell and my remorse was great, but I still get wet and squirmy when I think about it...
o.g.
Well in my philosophy, if a spanker cannot find a good reason to spank you then you're not being bratty enough :)
Prefectdt
Of course there is always a reason - His pleasure.
Hi Guys … As our activities are almost exclusively of a role-playing nature there is not really ever any reason per se except for our mutual desire to play … nonetheless there is generally a loose theme to our games and they are probably more dominated by MBJ’s artful and articulate reasoning as to why she shouldn’t be spanked that sets the tone … of course despite her quick wits, silver tongue and nimble mind she still always ends up with her bum higher than her head because that is what we both like … good enough reason for me … Happy 4th July to y’all … Cheers … RH
I prefer they have a reason, even if it's a "You're getting spanked because I say you're getting spanked", which is a reason that makes me wrinkle my nose.
I like it when the reason seems a little unfair. Like, one day, I told my guy that I had stepped into a too-hot bath. I noted that the pain from that was just an "ouch" - no fun in that at all. Later, he noted that my carelessness for stepping into a too-hot bath was a good reason for a spanking. Although I was consumed with the idea, "This is unfair! I had the painful burn! Why do I need a spanking, too??", I did submit to the spanking, and ended up quite happy that I did. By the end, I had forgotten about the 'unfair' part.
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