Sunday, March 28, 2010

MBS Spanko Brunch #219


Yes, it's the weekend and time again for our brunch. This time, we turn to an interesting topic provided by our friend Jannette.

I once heard a man say that he could walk away from This Thing We Do any time he chooses. Do you feel that way?

To join our brunch conversation, all you need to do is enter a comment below. Once everyone has had a chance to speak, I will post an edited summary.

19 comments :

Sara said...

Bonnie, no way no how could we walk away from TTWD. For us this is not a hobby or some form of entertainment but truly a chosen lifestyle that goes way beyond spanking. I think, if we stopped TTWD, it would be the death of our relationship. Now a time could come when spanking is physically impossible, but the basics of the D/s dynamic will live on I think.

SPANKEDHORTIC said...

From practical experience of trying to give up I can honestly say NO!

Giving it up resulted in a lot of problems for me, that ended up with a large amount of professional help having to come my way.

It was my psychologist that talked me into getting back into spanking (best advice ever).

You know, over the years I have heard a lot of people talking about giving it up, well I think that if you feel that is a path that you have to tread then give it a go. But if you are wise, you will not burn any bridges, just in case you need to return from where you came and most likely you will be back.

Prefectdt

Hermione said...

I'm wondering what prompted the man to make that statement. It sounds like what someone says when they're addicted and can't stop or walk away from the substance they are abusing. I consider spanking to be neither harmful nor dangerous, either to myself or to anyone else, so I have no need to make such a declaration.

If it happened that because of illness, injury, separation or other external factor, we were unable to continue with TTWD, I would be unhappy and perhaps distressed. But I would not choose to have it so.

I suppose if something else took on greater importance in my life, and forced me to choose, then I might have to decide to walk away. But outside of the (unlikely) decision to take a vow of chastity, I really can't see that happening.

Anonymous said...

No.

It really is that simple!

Anonymous said...

I agree with Hermoine in that I see no harm in spanking for either party, but I disagree with her in that I feel I am addicted to being spanked. I could not walk away from it. I don't have an addictive personality; I gave up caffeine though I love coffee, tried coke several times and easily walked away from it... I crave being spanked, however. It is a part of my sexuality.
Jean Marie

Anonymous said...

Sure, I could walk away.

I would be sad, half myself and useless at most things that I do.

It is part of my sexuality and more than that, it is part of who I am. It helps me to be happy, to be confident, it how I feel loved.

I would walk away and be found curled up somewhere. Silly man that could walk away from it and be happy- what was he doing here in the first place?

BabyMan said...

I am persuaded that there are 3 critical decision making moments in TTWD. 1) She is forced to look at herself and decide, "Is this me?" Probably happens first. 2) You both are forced to look at yourselves together and decide, "Is this us?" That came next for us. And 3) You, the individual man, is forced to look himself square in the face and decide, "Is this me?" I don't mean deciding if this is FOR you - but rather, IF THIS IS YOU. Once you experience all 3 of those moments, whether concurrently or separately in any order, and you decide this IS you for all 3 moments, you have reached the 'point of no return'. Say goodbye to your old life. Stick a fork in yourself. You're cooked. I'm cooked.

Irelynn said...

I've never tried it, but I think that if I had a good enough reason to, then yes, I could walk away from being spanked. However, nearly all of my friends in the UK are people who are active in the spanking scene. I suspect it would be hard to have the same kind of friendship with them if we constantly would have to avoid the topic of spanking. Not that I don't love all of them as people, but for many of us it has become a rather big part of our lives and simply part of who we are, and avoiding the subject would just feel artificial.

The Incredible Girl said...

No way! It is my way of life. It is part of the woman I want to be, and stopping would kill a piece of me.

Anonymous said...

Someone who could say something like that was never really serious about it in the first place. It's not a "thing" that can be dropped like last week's garbage. It's a lifestyle.

Daisychain said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Daisychain said...

(sorry, deleted comment as I noticed a typo, and wanted to correct it!) Take 2....
If there were a reason that we could not spank any more, we would still think of it, remember it, talk about it, fantasise about it..(as indeed we do, since, as we spend so much of our lives apart, actually being spanked by Davey is impossible at the moment...)
However, there is still a power exchange and discipline in our relationship, Davey still manages to check me, despite the distance!
Choosing to walk away from this? I don't think that would happen. If we couldn't spank, however, we would still be "us" since spanking is one of the enhancements of our sex life/relationship, it is not the foundation of our love.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

morningstar said...

Sometimes the "walking away" is not a choice one chooses... sometimes it is chosen for us.......

Just over 3 weeks ago i was uncollared (the whys and where fors are not important) the point is i was forced to walk away.........

Right now i can say i don't miss it .. not one little bit...... but i am busy dealing with pulling my life together into some semblance of normalcy........

But the spankings were something i craved before i found THE man to give them to me..... and so i would suspect the need is still buried somewhere inside of me...

they are a part of who i am... as much as my blue eyes, cheeky attitude.... and grey hair.

So i for one do not understand the ability to "just walk away"

morningstar

S.N.M. said...

I could do it. But it would take a lot of self control, and I wouldn't be happy.

A.S.S. said...

ehhh... "could"... "could jump off a bridge"... "could" do lots of things. Walk away from spanking, if you're talking not doing it anymore, yea "could" do that. Doing so would be extremely difficult though, and don't believe either of us could give up thinking about it.

Wonder btw why someone would brag about being able to walk away from spanking with ease. Kind of sounds like a big time hint that spanking never really was their thing.

:)
~Todd & Suzy

R Humphries said...

Hi Guys … Another interesting question … personally I doubt very much that I could ever ‘walk away’ from the spanking element of my life … that being said in an earlier incarnation of RH I was involved in a long and successful vanilla relationship … we did explore my spanking fetish but it did not work for either party so we set it aside … however I did not completely walk away from my interest in spanking, I continued with my life-long passion for writing and interacted with a number of discrete friends from the London scene … in my subsequent relationship with my wife Jojo spanking is an important contributor to our lives both sensually and sexually … like every family there have been times when the physical act of spanking has been just impractical but the subject always remained prominent in our stolen moments of privacy … so, no I very much doubt that I could walk away from such a major and satisfying part of my life … in fact I always assume that in our dotage Jojo and I will sit on our porch in rocking chairs cackling over our witty spanking banter … the downside to this plan is 1) I’ll need to build a porch and 2) I’ll have to buy some rocking chairs … Cheers … RH

Florida Dom said...

Bonnie: This is like saying you can walk away from who you are, like walking away from being lefthanded or righthanded. Or walking away from being straight or gay.

Even if you're not in a relationship, I think the fantasies and desires are always there. I think this is way the people in this lifestyle are born. The need can be suppressed just as vanilla people can live without sex but I think it's always lurking there somewhere in your psyche.

Anyway, that's my take.

FD

Loki_Darksong said...

There is no way that I could ever walk away from this. From as far back as my early teens this scene, this lifestyle, has been a part of my life. For me to leave it would maim me all the way down to my soul.

Anonymous said...

I did walk away. The spanking relationship had become toxic (not due to teh spankings but due to our falling out of love) and I ended up falling in love with a vanilla woman. I did not stop thinking about spanking or reading about it but I walked away from the act which is how I read this quote. I still very much love my vanilla wife. She still very much hates the whole idea that I want to spank her. However she does not care that I read about it or view pictures or videos or talk about it as long as she is not involved. Yes, I have given up a part of myself in order to buil up a different part of myself. Isn't that what love is about?

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