Bonnie's Mailbag

It's been a month since we last dipped into the old mailbag and I can see that there are plenty of messages in there. Here's a sample (some messages are edited or paraphrased for brevity).

Comment: Thank you for linking my blog!

Response: You're very welcome. One of the genuine pleasures of publishing this blog is the opportunity I have to assist other spanko bloggers as they begin their own journeys. These folks enrich our community and I want them to succeed and thrive. I am aware that when I post a new link, it generates a good stream of traffic. When I can both show my readers an interesting new destination and aid a growing blog, that's a win for everyone.

Comment: That picture of your butt gives me the hotts. My kind of butt to worship!

Response: I get this sort of message fairly frequently. I feel ambivalent about it. On one hand, this fellow is trying to pay me a compliment and I should probably accept it in that spirit.

On the other hand, I wonder if it ever occurred to him that this butt is attached to a real breathing three dimensional human? I am more than an assemblage of body parts, and talk of worshiping seems a little creepy. As I've said many times, this blog is really about my writing. The photos serve more or less as promotion.

Then I think that if I didn't want socially immature guys drooling over the pictures, I shouldn't post them. But that would shortchange the civil, respectful gentlemen who also express their appreciation.

So, I guess that leaves me back where I began. Thank you, sir. I'm glad you like it.

Question: I wrote a spanking story. Will you read it and give me your thoughts?

Response: I receive this request regularly and my response is always the same. Between work, home, Randy, and this blog, my free time is pretty limited. I seek to help, but it may take me a while to get back to you. I simply have to set priorities and that means that I cannot be as responsive as I would like to be.

Question(s): Do you ever wear jean skirts? If you have, have you ever been spanked over it?

Response: Yes and yes.

Question: i am ajapanese boy. i would like to get spanked. will you spank me?

Response: You're still a boy and I'm a grandmother, we're 12,000 kilometers apart, I don't spank, and I play exclusively with my husband. Other than that, I see no problem at all.

Question: I know you've never heard of me before, but will you help promote my worthy charity on your blog?

Response: I'm not cold hearted, but we have to draw the line somewhere. I've never asked readers for money. Nor will I allow someone else to do that. There are plenty of opportunities for people to solicit. Just not here.

The sole exception is a very infrequent link to a friend's cause. Such is the case with Luna's Blog-a-thon to stop domestic abuse.

Question: You linked my blog. I'm glad you like it, but I didn't intend to share it with the world. How did you find it?

Response: I'm genuinely sorry this happened. My intent was to provide some exposure to a great young blog. I had no idea.

If you place something on the Internet, no matter how obscure you think the location may be, people will inevitably find it. In this instance, I used a search engine, but the details are inconsequential. Blogger, WordPress, and LiveJournal all have a method for setting up a blog that is open by invitation only. If you don't want the public inside, I suggest this type of approach.

This episode breaks my heart. My correspondent is a nice person, a very skilled diarist, and a dedicated spanko. She ultimately deleted her blog because I linked it. She says she may create another blog someday. I hope that comes to pass.

Question: wear short skirts?

Response: This was the complete text of the e-mail. I will sometimes wear a short skirt for Randy when we're playing. The rest of the time, my skirts are generally appropriate for the setting or activity.

Question: How can I optimize my blog for search engine performance?

Response: There are people who make a profession of tuning web sites for search engine optimization (SEO). At the same time, the big search engine firms tune their software to avoid being fooled by such tricks. Some of this is over my head, but I believe there are a number of fairly simple measures that can help.

• I have recorded a lot of thoughts on enhancing your blog in my Blogging Smarts articles.


• A good starting point is the meta tags near the top of your template. You can "view source" on popular blogs and web sites and see how they present themselves to search engines.


• The keywords you select are at least as important as how you market them. I try to strike a balance between words that uniquely describe my blog and those that are likely to bring in a lot of traffic.


• The words you use within the blog are also relevant. There are several words that are only mildly related to my topic that drag in hoards of readers. For example, anytime I reference any sort of women's undergarment in any context, readers arrive in droves. Once they get here, many find my spanking content to their liking as well.


• You can also go around and submit your blog to all of the common search engines. I don't think this is as necessary as it once was, but it can't hurt, especially with some of the blog-oriented search engines like Technorati and Sphere.

Search engine optimization is a worthy effort, but the majority of my hits come from links on other blogs. Your blogroll can and should provide an excellent opportunity for cross-promotion.

Question: Do you like tight thongs?

Response: No, I much prefer to wear the correct size.

Comment: I wanted to let you know that I deleted my blog. Despite having hundreds of visitors per day, almost no one ever commented.

Response: I am sorry to hear that you're giving up the blog, but if the time is right, I certainly can't find fault. I hope you backed up of all of your hard work before deleting it. Regardless of what you might think today, someday you will likely want those stories.

As for the comments, I can't tell you that my experience is much different. My ratio of visits to comments is usually several hundred to one. That's simply the way it works. The vast majority of readers don't comment. The tiny fraction who do comment do so only occasionally.

These numbers are indisputable. However, we choose how to interpret them. I believe that the thousands of people who visit this blog every day like what they find here and keep coming back because they want more. All bloggers love comments, but even in their absence, I know those silent readers are out there. For their presence, I am humbly grateful.

Question: I'm having trouble posting comments using my Blogger ID. Have you any suggestions?

Response: Yes. The problem I've seen happens when you enter a comment, then type in the magic word, and then login at the bottom. When you try to submit the comment, the magic word and password are rejected for some reason and you have to type them again. If you're not paying close attention, you might think that your comment was accepted when it wasn't. The second time, it almost always works.

The work-around is to login to Blogger before you enter any comments. This seems to eliminate the problem.

Question: I would like to know the esposide name of the Flinstones where Wilma and Betty recieved a paddling from Fred and Barney and their buddies at the Water Buffalo Lodge.

Response: That was "Ladies Night at the Lodge." Yes, I had to look it up!

Qustion: rad bych videl vas zadek po vyprasku a nebo se ho zu�

Response: Czech-mate!

Question: Is it good to be a girl?

Response: It is for me, but I was born this way. I haven't anything with which to compare.

Question: When are you going to post another poll? Ditto a spankologue?

Response: We'll probably have a poll later this week.

I discontinued the spankologue series last year. Quite honestly, it got to be more trouble than it was worth. The American Spanking Society blog now has a similar feature they call the Wink.

Comment: I'm worried that I'm literally obsessed with spanking.

Response: We joke sometimes about having a kink obsession, but it's certainly possible to take an intense interest beyond the point where it's healthy and productive. If you feel as though it's interfering with your life and you want to make a change, I suggest that you seek out a kink-aware therapist. The goal would not be to eliminate the kink, but rather to restore a comfortable balance.

Question: The concept behind my blog is no longer valid, so I am thinking about deleting it. Is there anything I should know?

Response: Yes. In Blogger, it's notoriously simple to wipe out months or years of work. I know a couple of bloggers who have done precisely this and later regretted it. As I mentioned previously, at very least, you should back up all of your text. Even if you don't want it today, you may find yourself blogging again in the future.

I think there is a better alternative to deleting a blog. If you simply delete it, there is a good change that spammers will take over the URL and annoy your loyal readers. However, if you instead clear out all of the posts and leave only a simple goodbye, people will know you're gone (and why, if you choose to share that information). Should you elect to resume blogging in the future, your name and template are ready to go. As an added bonus, you can keep all your links in a handy location.

However, the best option, unless you have a strong reason to do otherwise, is to post a message explaining your absence and leave the blog as it is. When you're ready to return, everything will be in place. In the meantime, readers can still enjoy all of your great posts. (Thank you T&S for your comment)


I guess that's enough for now. May all of your spankings be good ones!