OK, this is off-topic. I admit it. But it just so needs to be said…
These are some messages that, for reasons that will become evident, I didn’t include in my usual mailbag segment. Let’s see if we can have a little fun with them.
Message: I am the former oil minister of Nigeria…
Response: Oh yeah? I used to be court toady to the Livestock Queen at the Murphy County Fair.
Message: Miracle penis growth formula!
Response: That would a miracle all right. I believe I’ll pass.
Message: Confidential stock alert
Response: How confidential can it be if spammers know about it?
Message: XXX squirting beauties
Response: I’m holding out for four X’s
Message: Meet hot girls in your town
Response: If I really wanted to meet those girls, I’d probably just say “hello.”
Message: Free on-line casino action!
Response: I’ll wager the “free” casino wants a credit card number.
Message: Buy \/l@ggr@ cheep
Response: Why would I buy anything from people who can’t spell?
Message: Microsoft Office for $50
Response: Have I shown you my bridge in Brooklyn?
Message: Weight loss breakthrough your doctor doesn’t want you to know about
Response: If my doctor doesn’t want me to know, I’m confident it’s a bad idea.
Message: Grow hair instantly!
Response: Look, it’s the amazing human Chia Pet...
Message: Lowest prices on Rolex
Response: Why is my wrist turning green?
Message: Your eBay account has been suspended
Response: Thank goodness. I was going broke bidding on that junk!
3 comments :
Oh spammers... will they never learn! What no penis enlargement? I see growth, but that makes it sound like you could start from scratch.
And come now Bonnie, you are worth at least five Xs
Ree: Thanks! I can't stop spammers so the only option left is to ridicule them.
Doc: But I don't want one at all, except maybe from my husband once in a while! :D
Ohh!! I get those too!! I love that others can find them funny too! Thanks for making me laugh out loud!!!
Carye
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