Monday, April 24, 2006

Twenty Spanking Euphemisms

It's remarkable how many different ways a gal can be told that she is about to receive a spanking. Here are twenty variations I've heard at our house.
  1. Bend over that chair
  2. It's time for a session with the hairbrush
  3. Grab your ankles
  4. Stick it out
  5. Come here, young lady
  6. It's nothing a good spanking won't fix
  7. I'll tan your hide
  8. Lie across my lap
  9. We'll just see about that, Missy
  10. Lose those panties
  11. Assume the position
  12. Drop your pants
  13. That sounds like a bottom line issue to me
  14. It's time for another lesson
  15. I need to apply some heat to your seat
  16. Get the paddle
  17. I'll have you blushing at both ends
  18. You won't be sitting comfortably tomorrow
  19. Bare your bottom
  20. Let's toast your buns
Any way you say it, when I hear these words, I can be quite certain that my posterior will be smarting soon!

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7 comments :

dwcmike said...

Variety is the spice of life, thus different ways to say come and get your spanking now is exciting, even though they all mean the exact same thing. This was a great post, I will forward the ideas to my wife. Hope you get to experience all of them within the year. (or semi- annually, but definitely not monthly)
bottoms up
Mike

Anonymous said...

Nice ones Bonnie, I've used most of these except the paddle one and the buns one.
We never used a paddle, didn't use to be an English toy and buns, I think arrived over here with the internet.
hugs,
Paul.

Anonymous said...

Some I've heard:
1.Nice and tight please, susan.
2.Skirt up, knickers down, bottom up.
3.You're going to have to grin and bare it.
4.Touch your toes
5.Over you go.
6.Up stairs, on the bed , face down, NOW
7.Head down, bottom up.
8.I think you know what your bottom's earned.
9.Moon shine time
10.Bottom bare, over the chair, when I get home.
And they all end up with the same result; a hot sore bum !
Susan.

Bonnie said...

Mike - Thanks! As a writer, I earn my living from the fact that there are many ways to say anything. But never is this variation more fun than in the moments immediately preceding a well-executed spanking.

Paul - Ah, the internet! ...and we on this side of the ocean learned all about canes.

Susan - Those are all good. One of my correspondents added "I'm going to blister your bottom." I believe if we worked at it, we could gather one hundred of these saying. But, let's not. We needn't make things too easy for our spankers, right?

Padme - Thanks! I hope your week is going well.

Homestead Crafter said...

And then there's Boss's favorite:

Keep it up, brat, and the flat of my hand will be talking to the round of your sassy butt.

*gulp* Usually HURTS a LOT though of course, the way things have been for months now, I haven't had the hurt lol. (or anything else either...boohoo...i'm jealous of ya Bonnie girl - you get it often, heehe...I can only hope for SOON.)

And thanks for keeping up such a neato blog - love to read it!!

Bonnie said...

Cameo - That phrase evokes a great mental picture.

I hope things turn around for you soon, Cameo (and vice versa!). You deserve to be happy and satisfied.

Thank you for your generous words. I'm glad you're here!

Hugs
Bonnie

Anonymous said...

I always heard, “I’ll tan your fanny!”

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