Spanko Brunch Recap: Feb 5, 2006

Thanks to all of the participants for another excellent Spanko Sunday Brunch. These answers are, as always, tremendous.

The question was:

I consider the physical act of spanking to be just the tip of a much larger iceberg. Do you agree? If so, can you describe the rest of your iceberg? If this analogy doesn't apply to your relationship, why not?

Here are the highlights from your responses.

Marcus: I've never seen spankings as useful for discipline. I enjoy giving them only to a sexy woman (one who enjoys receiving them). My favorite part is the woman's responsiveness. How she acts during the spank makes me harder. One woman I spanked kept moving her tush into the paddle just as I swatted, but she also had her mouth full of cock at the time too. I gave a birthday spanking to a 34 year old last fall, and her immediate response was to nibble my ear and cuddle. All of this makes the spanking so much more erotic. And I want the eroticism.

Rose: Spanking is the tip of the iceburg. For me, it's either the erotic warm up to a really great fucking or an interlude between sucking my partner's cock and more fucking. Either way, spanking gets me so very wet and hot. Friday, Jefferson gave me such a great spanking my juices were literally running down my legs. As I said last week, it's also a way to purge pent up emotions. It brings me to a submissive, open place where I am totally blissful and hungry to please my partner, and to have him please me. The lovely cuddling and being safely brought back down feels so great. Spanking leads to great places, both submissive and erotic. I'm always ready for more!

Tigger: For me, spanking goes way beyond the physical aspect of just getting my bottom smacked because it's totally sexual. It turns me on like nothing else!

The other day was a great example. I called my hubby at work about something completely unrelated and happened to mention (in a very sexy voice, I might add) that working on the current spanking romance story I'm writing got me all hot and bothered! To which, he replied, "Bad girl. Go give yourself a spanking."

I laughed, said, "I love you," and hung up. Of course, the words had only gotten me more aroused and they were all I could think about as I went back to my writing!

When he got home, he asked me if I did what he told me. Silly me, I didn't know what he was referring to (honestly!). He gave me that sexy grin and said, "Spank yourself for getting so turned on earlier."

We were in the bedroom while having this conversation, so I was already half-naked in only my bra and panties. Being the good girl that I am, I obediently bent over the bed and proceeded to give myself a few light spanks on my panty-covered bottom.

My hubby watched for a moment, and then shook his head. "Uh-uh," he said. "I mean a real spanking."

He went around the bed to my night table (which is where we keep our spanking toys). I could only imagine which implement he was going to get! He came around with my new favorite toy, the bath brush from the Vermont Country Store! Okay, now I was even more turned on than I'd been that afternoon!

Without a word, he pulled down my panties, and then told me to reach back for the bath brush. Again, being the good girl that I am, I obeyed.

"Go ahead," he said, "Spank yourself."

I did so without hesitation, and I thought I did a pretty good job, too. Apparently, my hubby didn't think so, however, because after a moment, he took the bath brush from me, put a firm hand on my back to hold me in place, and spanked me himself!

That spanking scene had all the makings of what makes a spanking so special for us. There was sexy banter, a touch of domination, a little bit of submissiveness, a very well-spanked bottom, lots of love, and the kind of intimacy and closeness that only a spanking can provide!

Mike: For me, it depends. When being spanked, it is the spanking that is arousing. Add in the submission of baring myself, the position, asking for it, etc. But for me, all of those things together are maybe half of the equation. The spanking itself, when I’m receiving, is a major factor in what turns me on.

My wife, on the other hand, is very different. The more turned on she is already, the more she enjoys a spanking. She wants to be well on her way to bliss before the sting starts to really build. After getting her nice and aroused with my tongue, fingers, and whatever else, she gets pushed to higher heights when she hears, "turn over," or "lay over my lap", or "get me the hairbrush". Then it's a matter of keeping her in a state of high arousal, and adding in the pain. She doesn't just enjoy spanking, she likes the loss of control, being restrained, and varying amounts of pain particularly to her cheeks and nipples.

So, for me receiving, the spanking itself is big part of the iceberg. For my wife, it's a piece of it, and maybe not even the piece sticking up.

CeeCi: I so agree, spanking is only the tip of my iceberg. How could it not be?

After years of fantasizing, but not acknowledging this part of myself I have found someone to guide me on this part of my life's journey. The arousal I experience, the pleasure and the orgasms are delicious. Yet I know it goes much deeper.

Spanking has taught me to trust another being in a way I've never trusted before. Spanking has given me the courage to express what I want and what I need not only when I'm in the bedroom, but more importantly, when I'm not. This seemingly simple act has released something which has been held deep inside of me for a very long time. I have finally found my voice.

In my opinion, spanking and communication go hand in (um) hand. The very act of giving and receiving a spanking will not be consensual if one of the participants is not fully engaged in the process. Spanking brings me to right here and right now. It focuses me on the moment. It calms me, arouses me and centers me. Knowing there is someone in my life who loves me so much he wants to fulfill my needs brings me a peace I've never known before.

Linda: Spanking to me is the prelude to many forms of communication with my husband. The way in which it's used will dictate the emotional, mental and physical reactions and actions we may have or display.

The simple act of spanking is nothing without the other components that brought us to that point. Whether it be for sexual foreplay, discipline or punishment.

One thing I can say for sure is, spanking has allowed me to gain respect and devotion to both my husband as well as our relationship. We use spanking for so many different aspects of our relationship. In most cases, spanking is synonymous with sexual gratification. But spanking also provides us with a deeper sense of each other as well as our bridge to communicating the negatives and the positives within our relationship and each one as individuals. Spanking has taught me humility as well as allowed me to let go of my inhibitions that could inadvertently hurt our relationship.

Trust and love are both strong positive aspects of the "larger iceberg", my submission has grown with our relationship and his caring more sensitive side towards my feelings and weird convoluted ways of thinking has grown with my submission.

Most importantly, spanking is one way we are able to express our feelings and share the closest bond two people can have.

Bonnie: I wrote a tutorial article that offers a partial explanation.

For me, there is a whole spiritual dimension that I find difficult to accurately describe. It combines a feeling of connectedness, an emotional bonding, and a complete openness. The result is a sense of overwhelming fulfillment. This element is my iceberg. It couldn't exist without the act of spanking, but it transcends that physcial experience.

See you all next week!