Saturday, February 26, 2011

MBS Spanko Brunch #267

Once again, we are gathered for a weekend conversation about that one topic that is always on our minds. This week's concept was suggested by our new friend Kathy.

Do you (and/or your partner) feel as though as though your spanking sessions are frequent enough, too frequent, or not frequent enough? Are your spankings appropriately severe, too severe, or not severe enough? Are they long enough in duration, too long, or not long enough?

I invite you to join our discussion by entering your response below in the form of a comment. Once everyone has registered their opinions, I will post an edited summary of the proceedings. Please tell us what you think!


Raven Red said...

Being in a different country than Nick, it did rather pose a problem at first. With Nick, there is not actually any problem. He will spank me when he deems enough is enough, normally after a warning or two (which I am "happy" with), and he knows exactly when to stop.

However, back in South Africa, I have to rely on two local disciplinarians to do the spanking. It was a little bit tough in the beginning - if I am being spanked, I do need to be pushed to the point where I totally submit, accept and even understand the reasoning for the spanking (and not my version of it).

If the spanking is stopped to early, I become extremely unsettled, and then everything is wrong, including a Raven that becomes extremely argumentative, sharp with the tongue and unruly.

It has taken a couple of months of mutual trust, and for the two local men to understand that I do not break, it is consensual, but most importantly, it is quite a need within me.

Frequency? Since I have entered the world of spanking, and from my first spanking received as an adult, Nick and I have determined that it is about a two-week cycle with me. After a spanking, I become soft, gentle and docile, however, slowly but surely, it will start building up again - within as stated, a two-week period.

The severity of the spankings for me personally depends on how stubborn or emotional I am. I can be caned quite hard before the stubbornness gives, but must be honest, to be over the knee of Nick, is most probably the worst, even though it is a hand spanking. It is intimate, humiliating, and dear gods - that man has a hand made from steel!

My firm believe is that a good spanking depends on how well the spanker understands the spankee - in all aspects.

xantu said...

Spanking sessions are mostly impromptu... My Master is very much of an impulsive, blitz attack kind of guy. Too frequent? Not frequent enough? Too severe? Not severe enough? Mannnn... that varies so wildly as to be nearly impossible to make a general statement.

Frequency is more than adequate, though his timing can be freakin' awful. I know sometimes when it is happening it seems so severe as to be unbearable, but when it stops, I feel like it was not severe enough.

I think if I had any control over it... I would prefer planned sessions, ones that I can develop a sense of anticipation about and that they be less severe and longer. But at the same time, I do not want to have any sense of control over what is happening to me. It is a bit of a conundrum.

Uncle Nick said...

Raven has pretty much covered everything, so I will content myself with pondering on the meaning of "frequent" and "severe."

Sure, I enjoy paddling a backside, but if I never touched one again I could live with that. Thus the frequency and severity really depend on the degree of delinquency. If a girl is good and does as she is told then she will never feel my hand. On the other hand if she isn't then she will.

Anonymous said...

Being unpartnered, I would have to say never enough spanking!!! I crave it! Where are all the spankos in my area hiding?

Happy Weekend!
valley girl

Hermione said...

I'd have to say that my spankings are just the right severity, and usually long enough, although I would gladly accept harder and longer ones.

As for frequency, I'd like them more often. Ours are always scheduled, and although that's a fine arrangement that works for both of us, I would also enjoy some spontaneous spankings that are equally formal and not just a few playful swats.

This is She. said...

It all depends on the time of year, I guess. There will be a few months where everything is perfect. Then, stuff happens, and it slowly gets pushed to the back burner. At that point, they are no longer frequent enough, or severe enough.

OnHerKnee said...

My spankings certainly need to be much more frequent and they certainly need to be MUCH more severe and the duration needs to be MUCH longer.

Also, they need to be with intense scary implements that will leave me extremely sore for a very long time. I want all of these things,

I crave it all desperately and I fantasize about it constantly and it’s all I can think about.

I want all of these things for my spankings, I NEED it for my next spanking and if it happens in the next five minutes it won’t be soon enough.

I have to have all of it.


Once I hear the first implement being pulled out of the toy drawer and I realize it's headed for my ass along with the knowledge there's nothing I can do to stop it, I want none of it.

sixofthebest said...

Bonnie, depending on the type of spanking given.If it is a punishment spanking, A spanking lasts about ten minuets. If a romantic interlude spanking, about a half hour. Of course as to the severity, punishment always will be much more severe, so a cane or birchrod is used. For romantic spankings, a hand, paddle, or hairbrush.

Anonymous said...

Quite often mine are not long enough nor severe enough & they are never frequent enough! But he is improving on all of that. The last two were perfect :) I did finally experience one that I did still feel the next day and you all were right~it didn't hurt to sit but it sure hurt when standing back up! Hoping for another soon :)

Make Mine Red

Rayne said...

I truly enjoy a variety. For example, while I could not mentally or physically handle a more "severe" spanking on a more "frequent" basis, getting the chance to play a more severe scene every once in a while (or perhaps a little more frequently then that, but not too much!) is lovely.

And as much as I enjoy a longer session, whether otk or otherwise, for the connection and emotional potential -- especially in a role-play, it is also extremely exhilarating to suddenly receive a flurry of smacks in a much shorter duration. :)

As some others here, however, being unpartnered presents rather a problem with frequency -- so while I would enjoy a wide variety of duration and severity, the current frequency (or lack thereof!) is definitely not enough! :D

Thank you Bonnie, and Kathy! :D

ronnie said...

I'm happy to say our spanking sessions are frequent but would like them to last longer. Severity of them is just about right though I think I would gladly accept harder spankings with certain implements.


KellyRed said...

Now that he has upped the frequency, he has also lessened the severity. I might think "I can't take this" while a herd on is happening, but I always, always wish for more almost the same moment that we're done. They never last long enough though.

I know, I'm never satisfied.


I'll take these one at a time.

Frequency - Not nearly enough. I have no regular partner, my playmates tend to be transient and I cannot afford to pay to play that often. If I get spanked an average of once every three months, then I consider it a good year.

Severity - It depends on the playmate.

Duration - Very happy there :) my shorter sessions tend to be the hour long paid for ones. With a fellow amateur, things tend to go on longer.


Pink said...

What our spankings lack in frequency, they make up for in longevity and creativity. D and I don't live together, but spend every other weekend and some weeknights together, schedules permitting. On those days, he is sure to send me off to bed with a more-than-rosy behind.

As far as severity, hindsight says that he's never been too severe, although I thought so at the time. He has a knack for knowing how long, how hard and how often, depending on our particular circumstances.

There are some days when 5 minutes is way too long for me. And other times when I could go whole hours of near constant spanking. D is in tune with this, somehow, and usually delivers just what I need.

I just wish he lived across the street, but I suppose that might be asking for too much.

Great question!

Anonymous said...

let's see, frequency -- could be more often but i can't complain, too much. severity, as has been pointed out, just depends on the moment. sometimes he is too severe IMO, not his. duration--he always stops long after i think he should.
Really though he is in control of all of this, and i can only make requests, which he may or may not choose to hear.

Daisychain said...

OK, I want to join in with this, but it involves a memory better than an elephant's!!!

It has been about 2 years since my last spanking... so I will go back in the tardis to answer from the last time we were actually together, lol.
For punishment...
Frequency ... these were administered when needed, so this aspect doesn't really apply! Probably would have been needed less if the maintenance ones had been more often!
Severity ... severity and length go hand in hand here. The more severe, the shorter in length, because it was either a "short sharp shock" or a long hard lesson with a bigger build up.
Length ... see above!

Now, for fun, Frequency ... not enough!
Severity ... could have taken harder, especially with a long, slow, sensuous build up and lecture... (who cares what about, lol)
Length ... LONGER, LONGER, DON'T STOP!!!! Damn it, I will have to misbehave now....

JW said...

We have only been engaging in "real" spanking for 8 days because it took 15 years of being happily married before I finally revealed my desires to my husband. Right now the frequency is great, but the duration and severity is not. He's still concerned about "hurting" me and stops when he doesn't like the way my bottom looks. Unfortunately, I bruise very easily so that doesn't take long. Hopefully he will get over that as time goes by. I'm still hoping for that "begging for mercy" spanking.

Anonymous said...

Duration: Since our spankings are mostly foreplay, they almost always end too soon for my taste...he is eager to get on to the "main event."

Severity is just about right, though I could take even a bit more and still enjoy it.

Frequency, maybe once a week or so; not every time we have sex. I could enjoy a spanking session that had nothing to do with sex but it doesn't seem to happen.

CurtisG said...

Presently unpartnered. Could enjoy spankings daily, in my experience. Never into punishment or discipline, so I'm not into great severity, but am into longer spankings which may have greater or lesser sting pending the mood of the day.

Respecting Mistress said...

Since we adopted our flr lifestyle my spankings tend to be punishments and therefore tend to err on the side of severity. Are they severe enough? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. Are they frequent enough? Mistress would say no and i would tend to often outside forces upset our home routine and regime.

Anonymous said...

It depends if they are punishment spankings or pleasure spankings, which in our case are mainly the latter.
Frequency - as often as possible, but if my bottom has recently taken a sound spanking, I like to let it return to normal, before it gets the next one, presenting a very tender bottom for a new spanking is not fun.
Severity - I can take a good hard spanking provided it is with a 'smacky' implement; hand, hairbrush, slipper, paddle etc, but the more lethal weapons, canes, tawses,etc, come more into the punishment group !
Duration - provided my spanking has started with a good warm up, and my bottom has first been raised to a hot smart, I can take any more that D wants to dish out, as I lie there feeling it getting hotter and hotter, and more and more blown up, as it bounces under his vigorous spanks. But, it also makes me very sexy, and gets to the point when a good seeing to becomes more important than a sound spanking ! Also D often makes me adopt some rather uncomfortable poses, which I would rather not hold for too long; otk, over a chair arm, lying flat, just fine for heating up my rear cheeks, but diaper position, kneeling but bent, and the one I really don't like - toe touching; so undignified, and offers my private bits to the spanking tool. S.

RosieBee said...

With kids and family around ALL the time I would have to say most definatally not frequent enough. Serverity and duration have been on target for the most part, from my bottom point of view that is. I'm not sure what my husband would say considering I'm the spanko and he's the more than willing vanilla. I believe he doesn't have as much of a problem with the frequency of our sessions as I do.

Our Bottoms Burn said...

Our spankings are just what we like. Of course, we sometimes ask for the spanking we want and that would be like cheating for many.

Mark said...

Good question.
Then, to Raven Red, who just about covered it - our view coincide.
And my $0.02's worth: it must be defined if punishment or just fun spanking. In our case, since we do exclusively the fun type, something that is both hilarious and frustrating is happening: due to family and living circumstances, the opportunity just isn't there as it used to be in the past, so... we "do it" wherever we can, when we can. Hotels, BTW, just don't cut it anymore, I think that there is not enough privacy.
Frequency: nowhere nearly enough.
Severity: increased substantially, as if craving to "catch up" - which most of the time produces very long lasting visible and painful effects. (Not that this is bad.)
Duration: same as Severity - as if looking to catch up for all the spankless times. What happens, however, is that if due to severity certain areas are no longer safe to spank, then we now extend the play to other areas as well. Meaning that new areas of exploration open up, which is good.

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