Sunday, February 27, 2011

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Feb 27

Our question this week was whether your current spanking frequency, duration, and severity was appropriate, too little, or too much. Here are your thoughts.

Raven Red: Being in a different country than Nick posed a problem at first. With Nick, there is not actually any problem. He will spank me when he deems enough is enough, normally after a warning or two (which I am "happy" with), and he knows exactly when to stop.

However, back in South Africa, I have to rely on two local disciplinarians to do the spanking. It was a little bit tough in the beginning. If I am being spanked, I do need to be pushed to the point where I totally submit, accept and even understand the reasoning for the spanking (and not just my version).

If the spanking is stopped too early, I become extremely unsettled, and then everything is wrong, including a Raven who becomes extremely argumentative, sharp with the tongue and unruly.

It has taken a couple of months of mutual trust, and for the two local men to understand that I do not break, it is consensual, but most importantly, it is quite a need within me.

As for frequency, Nick and I have determined that it is about a two-week cycle. After a spanking, I become soft, gentle and docile. However, slowly but surely, it will start building up again within a two-week period.

The severity of the spankings for me personally depends on how stubborn or emotional I am. I can be caned quite hard before the stubbornness gives. But I must be honest, being over Nick's knee is probably the worst, even though it is a hand spanking. It is intimate, humiliating, and dear gods, that man has a hand made from steel!

My firm believe is that a good spanking depends upon how well the spanker understands the spankee in all aspects.

Xantu: Our spanking sessions are mostly impromptu. My Master is very much an impulsive, blitz-attack kind of guy. Too frequent? Not frequent enough? Too severe? Not severe enough? That varies so wildly that it is nearly impossible to make a general statement.

Frequency is more than adequate, though his timing can be freakin' awful. Sometimes, when it is happening, a spanking seems so severe as to be unbearable. But when it stops, I feel like it was not severe enough.

I think if I had any control, I would prefer planned sessions. I would like to be able to develop a sense of anticipation and I wish that spankings be less severe and last longer. At the same time, I do not want to have any sense of control over what is happening to me. It is a bit of a conundrum.

Uncle Nick: Raven has pretty much covered everything, so I will content myself with pondering on the meanings of "frequent" and "severe."

Sure, I enjoy paddling a backside, but if I never touched one again I could live with that. Thus the frequency and severity really depend on the degree of delinquency. If a girl is good and does as she is told, then she will never feel my hand. On the other hand, if she isn't then she will.

Valley Girl: Being unpartnered, I have to say there's never enough spanking! I crave it! Where are all the spankos in my area hiding?

Hermione: I'd have to say that my spankings are just the right severity, and usually long enough, although I would gladly accept harder and longer ones.

As for frequency, I'd like them more often. Ours are always scheduled, and although that's a fine arrangement that works for both of us, I would also enjoy some spontaneous spankings that are equally formal and not just a few playful swats.

She: It depends on the time of year, I guess. There will be a few months where everything is perfect. Then, stuff happens, and it slowly gets pushed to the back burner. At that point, they are no longer frequent or severe enough.

OnHerKnee: My spankings certainly need to be much more frequent, MUCH more severe and MUCH longer.

Also, they need to be delivered using intense scary implements that will leave me extremely sore for a very long time. I want all of these things. I crave it all desperately and I fantasize about it constantly and it’s all I can think about. I want all of these things for my spankings. I NEED it for my next spanking and if it happens in the next five minutes it won’t be soon enough.

However… When I hear the first implement being pulled out of the toy drawer, I realize that it's headed for my ass and there's nothing I can do to stop it, I want none of it.

Six of the Best: It depends on the type of spanking given. A punishment spanking lasts about ten minutes. A romantic interlude spanking takes about a half hour. Punishment is always much more severe, so a cane or birch rod is used. For romantic spankings, I prefer a hand, paddle, or hairbrush.

Make Mine Red: Mine are quite often neither long enough nor severe enough and they are never frequent enough! But he is improving. The last two were perfect. :) I finally experienced one where I still felt it the next day. You all were right – it didn't hurt to sit, but it sure hurt when standing back up! I'm hoping for another one soon. :)

Rayne: I truly enjoy a variety. For example, while I could not mentally or physically handle a more "severe" spanking on a more "frequent" basis, getting the chance to play a more severe scene every once in a while (or perhaps a little more frequently than that, but not too much!) is lovely.

And as much as I enjoy a longer session, whether OTK or otherwise, for the connection and emotional potential -- especially in a role-play, it is also extremely exhilarating to suddenly receive a flurry of smacks in a much shorter duration. :)

As some others, however, being unpartnered presents rather a problem with frequency. While I would enjoy a wide variety of duration and severity, the current frequency (or lack thereof!) is definitely not enough! :D

Ronnie: I'm happy to say that our spanking sessions are frequent, but would like for them to last longer. Severity is just about right, though I think I would gladly accept harder spankings with certain implements.

KellyRed: Now that he has upped the frequency, he has also lessened the severity. I might think "I can't take this" while it is happening, but I always, always wish for more almost the same moment that we're done. They never last long enough though.

I know, I'm never satisfied.

Prefectdt: Frequency – Not nearly enough. I have no regular partner, so my playmates tend to be transient and I cannot afford to pay to play very often. If I get spanked an average of once every three months, then I consider it a good year.

Severity – It depends upon the playmate.

Duration – I'm very happy there. :) My shorter sessions tend to be the hour-long paid for variety. With a fellow amateur, things tend to go on longer.

Pink: What our spankings lack in frequency, they make up for in longevity and creativity. D and I don't live together, but we spend every other weekend and some weeknights together, schedules permitting. On those days, he is sure to send me off to bed with a more-than-rosy behind.

As far as severity, hindsight says that he's never been too severe, although I may have thought so at the time. He has a knack for knowing how long, how hard and how often, depending on our particular circumstances.

There are some days when five minutes is way too long for me. Other times, I could go for whole hours of near constant spanking. D is in tune with this, somehow, and usually delivers just what I need.

I just wish he lived across the street, but I suppose that might be asking for too much.

Anne: The frequency could be more often but I can't complain, too much. Severity, as has been pointed out, depends on the moment. Sometimes, he is too severe in my opinion, but not his. As for duration, he always stops long after I think he should.

Really, though, he is in control. I can only make requests, which he may or may not choose to hear.

Daisy: It has been about two years since my last spanking, so I will go back in time to answer from the last time we were actually together. LOL

Punishment spankings were administered when needed, so frequency doesn't really apply! It probably would have been needed less if the maintenance ones had been more often!

Severity and length go hand-in-hand. The more severe a punishment spanking was, the shorter its length. This is because it was either a "short sharp shock" or a long hard lesson with a bigger build up.
For fun spankings, the frequency was not enough!

Regarding severity, I could have taken harder, especially with a long, slow, sensuous build up and lecture... (who cares what about? LOL)

As to the length: LONGER, LONGER, DON'T STOP! Damn it, I will have to misbehave now...

Anon: Since our spankings are mostly foreplay, they almost always end too soon for my taste. He is eager to get on to the "main event."

Severity is just about right, though I could take even a bit more and still enjoy it.

Our frequency is maybe once a week or so. It's not every time we have sex. I could enjoy a spanking session that had nothing to do with sex, but it doesn't seem to happen.

CurtisG: I'm presently unpartnered. I could enjoy spankings daily. I've never been into punishment or discipline, so I'm not into great severity. However, I am into longer spankings that may have greater or lesser sting depending upon the mood of the day.

Respecting Mistress: Since we adopted our FLR lifestyle, my spankings tend to be punishments and therefore tend to err on the side of severity. Are they severe enough? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. Are they frequent enough? Mistress would say no and I tend to agree. Too often, outside forces upset our home routine and regime.

S: It depends whether the spankings are for punishment or pleasure. In our case, it's mainly the latter.

My preferred frequency is as often as possible, but after my bottom has recently taken a sound spanking, I like to let it return to normal before the next one. Presenting a very tender bottom for a new spanking is not fun. I can take a good hard spanking provided that it is with a 'smacky' implement such as a hand, hairbrush, slipper, paddle, etc. The more lethal weapons like canes and tawses fall more into the punishment group!

Provided that my spanking has started with a good warm up, and my bottom has first been raised to a hot smart, I can take any more that D wants to dish out. As I lie there, my bottom feels hotter and hotter, and more and more blown up, as it bounces under his vigorous spanks. But spankings also make me feel very sexy. It gets to the point where a good seeing to becomes more important than a sound spanking !

D often makes me adopt some rather uncomfortable poses, which I would rather not hold for too long. Among these are OTK and over a chair arm. Lying flat is just fine for heating up my rear cheeks, but the diaper position, kneeling but bent, and toe touching (the one I really don't like) are so undignified and offer my private bits to the spanking tool.

RosieBee: With kids and family around ALL of the time, I have to say most definitely not frequent enough. Serverity and duration have been on target for the most part, from my bottom point of view, that is. I'm not sure what my husband would say, considering that I'm the spanko and he's the more than willing vanilla. I believe he doesn't have as much of a problem with the frequency of our sessions as I do.

Our Bottoms Burn: Our spankings are just what we like. Of course, we sometimes ask for the spanking we want and that would be like cheating for many.

Mark: I agree with Raven Red who just about covered it.

I believe it must be defined whether it's a punishment spanking or just fun. We do exclusively the fun type. Something that is both hilarious and frustrating is happening. Due to family and living circumstances, the opportunity just isn't there as it used to be in the past, so... we "do it" wherever we can, when we can. Hotels, BTW, just don't cut it anymore, I think that there is not enough privacy.

Our frequency is nowhere nearly enough. Severity has increased substantially, as if we are craving to "catch up." Most of the time, this produces very long lasting visible and painful effects (not that this is bad).

Duration is about the same as severity. It's as if we are looking to catch up for all the spankless times. However, when certain areas become no longer safe to spank, we extend the play to other areas as well. Exploration is good.

Bonnie: I definitely have opinions about this subject and enunciate them from time to time. However, at our house, Randy makes the decisions about spankings. I've learned over the years that this arrangement works best for the two of us. So even when I think a spanking is too intense, too long, or too soon after the previous one, it's not.

Submission is a big part of the attraction of spanking for me. Allowing him to spank however he pleases pushes a lot of those buttons. In that light, I'm quite satisfied.

Thanks, everyone, for another excellent conversation. See you next week!

No comments :

Post a Comment