Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Mar 28

Our topic of the week examined the practicality of walking away from one's spanking interest. Here are your responses.

Sara: No way, no how could we walk away from TTWD. For us, this is not a hobby or some form of entertainment, but truly a chosen lifestyle that goes way beyond spanking. I think, if we stopped TTWD, it would be the death of our relationship. Now a time could come when spanking is physically impossible, but the basics of the D/s dynamic will live on I think.

Prefectdt: From practical experience of trying to give up I can honestly say NO! Giving it up resulted in a lot of problems for me, that ended up with a large amount of professional help having to come my way. It was my psychologist that talked me into getting back into spanking (best advice ever).

You know, over the years, I have heard a lot of people talking about giving it up. I think that if you feel that is a path that you have to tread, then give it a go. But if you are wise, you will not burn any bridges, just in case you need to return from where you came and most likely you will be back.

Hermione: I'm wondering what prompted the man to make that statement. It sounds like what someone says when they're addicted and can't stop or walk away from the substance they are abusing. I consider spanking to be neither harmful nor dangerous, either to myself or to anyone else, so I have no need to make such a declaration.

If it happened that because of illness, injury, separation or other external factor, we were unable to continue with TTWD, I would be unhappy and perhaps distressed. But I would not choose to have it so.

I suppose if something else took on greater importance in my life, and forced me to choose, then I might have to decide to walk away. But outside of the (unlikely) decision to take a vow of chastity, I really can't see that happening.

RPT (Fred Bloggs): No. It really is that simple!

Jean Marie: I agree with Hermoine in that I see no harm in spanking for either party, but I disagree with her in that I feel I am addicted to being spanked. I could not walk away from it. I don't have an addictive personality; I gave up caffeine, though I love coffee. I tried coke several times and easily walked away from it. I crave being spanked, however. It is a part of my sexuality.

Poppy: Sure, I could walk away. But I would be sad, half myself and useless at most things that I do.

It is part of my sexuality and more than that, it is part of who I am. It helps me to be happy, to be confident. It's how I feel loved.

I would walk away and be found curled up somewhere. Silly man that could walk away from it and be happy. What was he doing here in the first place?

BabyMan: I am persuaded that there are three critical decision making moments in TTWD: (1) She is forced to look at herself and decide, "Is this me?" This probably happens first. (2) You both are forced to look at yourselves together and decide, "Is this us?" That came next for us. And (3) You, the individual man, is forced to look himself square in the face and decide, "Is this me?" I don't mean deciding whether this is FOR you, but rather, whether this IS you. Once you experience all three of those moments, whether concurrently or separately in any order, and you decide this IS you for all three moments, you have reached the ''point of no return.” Say goodbye to your old life. Stick a fork in yourself. You're cooked. I'm cooked.

Irelynn: I've never tried it, but I think that if I had a good enough reason to, then yes, I could walk away from being spanked. However, nearly all of my friends in the UK are people who are active in the spanking scene. I suspect it would be hard to have the same kind of friendship with them if we constantly had to avoid the topic of spanking. Not that I don't love all of them as people, but for many of us, it has become a rather big part of our lives. It's simply part of who we are, and avoiding the subject would just feel artificial.

Naomi: No way! It is my way of life. It is part of the woman I want to be, and stopping would kill a piece of me.

Anon: Someone who could say something like that was never really serious about it in the first place. It's not a "thing" that can be dropped like last week's garbage. It's a lifestyle.

Daisy: If there were a reason that we could not spank any more, we would still think of it, remember it, talk about it, and fantasise about it (as indeed we do, since we spend so much of our lives apart).

However, there is still a power exchange and discipline in our relationship, Davey still manages to check me, despite the distance!

As for choosing to walk away from this, I don't think that would happen. If we couldn't spank, we would still be "us." Spanking is one of the enhancements of our sex life/relationship, it is not the foundation of our love.

morningstar: Sometimes the "walking away" is not a choice. Sometimes it is chosen for us.

Just over three weeks ago, I was uncollared (the whys and wherefores are not important). The point is that I was forced to walk away.

I can say that I don't miss it, not one little bit. But I am busy dealing with pulling my life together into some semblance of normalcy.

Spankings were something I craved before I found THE man to give them to me, so I suspect the need is still buried somewhere inside of me. They are a part of who I am, as much as my blue eyes, cheeky attitude, and gray hair.

So I for one do not understand the ability to "just walk away."

S.N.M.: I could do it. But it would take a lot of self control, and I wouldn't be happy.

Todd and Suzy: I could. I could jump off a bridge. I could do lots of things. Walking away from spanking, if you're talking about not doing it anymore, yes, I could do that. Doing so would be extremely difficult though, and I don't believe either of us could give up thinking about it.

I wonder, BTW, why someone would brag about being able to walk away from spanking with ease. It kind of sounds like a big time hint that spanking never really was their thing.

R Humphries: I personally doubt very much that I could ever ‘walk away’ from the spanking element of my life. That being said, in an earlier incarnation of RH, I was involved in a long and successful vanilla relationship. We did explore my spanking fetish, but it did not work for either party so we set it aside. However, I did not completely walk away from my interest in spanking. I continued with my life-long passion for writing and interacted with a number of discrete friends from the London scene. In my subsequent relationship with my wife Jojo, spanking is an important contributor to our lives both sensually and sexually. Like every family, there have been times when the physical act of spanking has been just impractical. But the subject always remained prominent in our stolen moments of privacy.

So, no, I very much doubt that I could walk away from such a major and satisfying part of my life. In fact, I always assume that in our dotage, Jojo and I will sit on our porch in rocking chairs cackling over our witty spanking banter. The downside to this plan is (1) I’ll need to build a porch and (2) I’ll have to buy some rocking chairs.

Florida Dom: This is like saying you can walk away from who you are. It's like walking away from being left-handed or right-handed, or walking away from being straight or gay.

Even if you're not in a relationship, I think the fantasies and desires are always there. I think this is the way the people in this lifestyle are born. The need can be suppressed just as vanilla people can live without sex, but I think it's always lurking there somewhere in your psyche.

Loki: There is no way that I could ever walk away from this. From as far back as my early teens, this scene and this lifestyle have been a part of my life. For me to leave, it would maim me all the way down to my soul.

Bonnie: Jannette sent me this quote because she thought it seemed very odd. I completely agree. For those who live this kink, walking away is just not an option. All of us will eventually find circumstances that curb our ability to play, but even that won't change who we are or what we like.

The man in question may experience second thoughts about his interest, and there's nothing wrong with that. We must each seek our own answers. However, like many others here, I have all the answers I need, at least for these questions. I'm a spanko and I always will be.

Thank you all for joining us!

MBS Spanko Brunch #219

Yes, it's the weekend and time again for our brunch. This time, we turn to an interesting topic provided by our friend Jannette.

I once heard a man say that he could walk away from This Thing We Do any time he chooses. Do you feel that way?

To join our brunch conversation, all you need to do is enter a comment below. Once everyone has had a chance to speak, I will post an edited summary.

Implement Stories: Darren and Janet

After an unanticipated pause, let's return to Implement Stories. Today's installment is brought to you by our friends Darren and Janet from Doonstartwo.

Being the gentlemen he is, Darren very occasionally allows Janet to choose the implement of her correction – and when she does, she almost invariably picks the riding crop. A blushing Janet purchased this many years ago from Fenwicks in Piccadilly Circus for the express purpose of chastising her firm mature curves. We don’t possess a horse and haven’t ridden in 25 years. From his conspiratorial – though scrupulously polite - smile, we reckon the assistant sells a lot of crops for the same reason. Janet can’t explain the why it’s her favourite beyond the fact of what the crop isn’t. In particular it isn’t a cane, her bête noire – a hairbrush, or "too harsh." From a spanker’s perspective, the beauty of the flexible shaft and wicked little leather flaps is the amount of control that can be exercised in application. The crop is primarily for fun rather than disciplinary purposes, allowing a slow steady build up of heat, precise targeting, and the ability to visit (carefully…) damper parts of one’s wife’s anatomy, the better to counterpoint the contrast between pain and pleasure. This picture was taken during a weekend at a distinctly up market "boutique" hotel in a beautiful southern English country town, just the place to indulge the pleasures of consensual CP without interruption.

Thank you, Darren and Janet for sharing your implement and its story.

If you would like to see a favorite spanking toy featured here on MBS, send me a photograph and a few words about it. I'd be delighted to help you show off your discovery!

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Mar 21

Our topic this week was spanking getaway destinations. Here are your thoughts.

Poppy: I do not live with my boyfriend, so I would like to be wherever he is.

If I had a fantasy option, then I may be a little dull and choose an old fashioned schoolroom with a blackboard.

Elysia: In my latest post, I described both my first sexual encounter with my husband and the first time he spanked me. Yesterday, we went for a lovely hike in the woods talk. Talk soon turned to my post and spanking in general. We both decided that we'd like to recreate that first encounter and have a good spanking session to boot. Our first spanking occurred in his apartment. We may have to rent a deserted island somewhere so we don't upset the other hikers, huh?

Hermione: I remember reading a short passage in a spanking anthology about an engaged couple who were walking through a park. He decides to spank her for some transgression and, sitting down on a bench, puts her over his knees. Then he discovers she is not wearing panties, and that leads to a scolding and a harder spanking. When it is over, they kiss passionately, oblivious to the gathered onlookers. I think it would be fun to recreate that scene.

Prefectdt: Not being able to play at home, there is a small city, less than two hours drive or train ride away, where special rooms can be hired. Some very interesting shops are located there and it is a center for other kinksters. The city also has a lovely, historic center and is generally a nice place to be between spanking adventures. So my favourite play destination is Antwerp. I wish that I could spend more time there.

Lil Sam: Sailor and I have a special cove at our favorite beach where we like to go to here in Canada. Unfortunately, we were not into spankings the last time we were there. I would love a spanking there.

There is also a special place at the beach near his home in the states that is very exciting as well.

Kel: So far, everyone is missing the intent of my question. I would like to learn about specific places, with real names and addresses where one might choose to go.

My favorite is the Richmond Hill Inn in Ashville, NC. They don't have cabins or cottages off to themselves, but they do have wonderful rooms, and when I have been there they have had a lot of vacancies. If the rooms on either side of you are unoccupied, you should be in good shape.

Jane: Sorry, Kel, I cannot give the specifics of my place, but I'm sure there are others like it.

I discovered my place last fall when, arriving home after a weekend spent with relatives (no spanking), my boyfriend's daughter was home and showed no sign of going out. We decided to go "berry picking" in the back woods. We found a tree that had fallen over and was sturdily lodged at the right height. I had a wonderful spanking bent over that tree. It has not yet been repeated due to winter weather, but I am hoping for another now that spring has arrived (we'll have to wait for leaves for privacy). Even when no spankings occur, just walking past the tree makes me smile. I hope that tree stays in place for a few more years!

Our Bottoms Burn: OK, Kel, The Cedar Grove Inn is a specific establishment in Vicksburg, MS. There are lots of room decors to choose from.

Daisy: A specific place? I prefer my husband's apartment in the USA. Or anywhere else we could actually BE TOGETHER. Sorry, I'm in a bad place right now. I'm missing him so much...

Aw Daisy, I hope your wish comes true, and soon!

Ronnie: I have no particular favourite location. I've been spanked countless times on holiday or on business trips abroad which I always like. Hotel spankings are great, including worrying about the noise, *knowing* all the other guests must surely know I've been spanked, and blushing when I pass anyone on our floor.

P always threatens a few days in a remote log cabin, but we never get around to it. An al fresco spanking in the woods also appeals to me, deep where no one would disturb us, bent over a fallen tree trunk, jeans and pants down and spanked, hard and simple.

We've been in woods a few times and have come close, but we always seem to get interrupted. Maybe we need to find some different woods.

SatyrLover: I really love the woodsy spanking ideas. Sadly, my spankee is not a nature buff. We have in the past, and I would love to again soon, spank away on the beach at night. The beach we visit, Ocean City, MD, lays the lifeguard stands on their sides at night. Bending her over that and making her bottom glow is always a much appreciated fantasy come true.

Raheretic: My favorite is in a chalet in the woods in the mountains above Gatlinburg, Tennesee. Tennesee just seems to be an area that just screams spanking what with its Southern US location and Bible belt orientation.

The woods constitute a fabulous switch garden and I adore having a spankee go out and cut a supply of switches either to use right there on the spot in the woods, or to be bound, three at a time, into switch rods for a sound flogging back in the chalet (or both:).

It always results in a wonderfully well whipped lady.

Texringer: I would love a beach setting, probably harking back to growing up on the Texas coast. It's always that possible the bottom could be wet from the dip in the bay when the spankings happened. I prefer a nice little secluded spot among the dunes with space for a campfire for the evening. There could be several spankings over the time we were there. And, it's always possible that someone might come along and see me being spanked.

OK, Kel, here are more specific directions: Padre Island (either the open part or the national seashore) on the Texas coast. (Not South Padre Island, the area near Corpus Christi).

Thomas: Okay, this probably isn't quite the answer that you're looking for, but my favorite spanking getaway (and Cookie's, now) is my yearly trip to Texas for the Texas Allstate Spanking party. I always come back rife with stories to share on my blog of the people that I've met and the girls that I've spanked. I just got back from this year's trip last week, and I probably have enough material to keep my blog filled for a month. :D

I think that's a perfectly fine answer and you and Cookie have the tales to prove it! I look forward to reading more.

Anon: There is a particular cabin in the woods of northern Georgia. It's secluded, but well kept. No prying ears...

R Humphries: Sadly, due to family and business commitments, we don’t get away as much as we used to. But Kel, if you’re looking for spanko friendly hotels check out the Hotel Monaco in San Francisco, La Colombe d’Or right here in Houston, or a little further afield, the Loungueville Manor on the Channel Island of Jersey. I have spent spanko indulgent weekends with My Beloved Jojo at all of these without complaint or disturbance. They’re all great hotels, a little on the special end, but if you book wisely in advance, you can get great deals.

Jean Marie: There is a place in the central coastal area of California called the Madonna Inn. Every room has a different theme. A former boyfriend and I once stayed in a room that resembled a cave that really brought the hulking brute out in him.

In San Diego is the Hotel del Coronado. It's very upscale and was built long ago. You not only have a gorgeous beach to frolic upon (I've been spanked there on three occasions, followed by long, loud sexual encounters and have not been disturbed), but you are certain that all your surrounding neighbors hear every swat and yelp in the old style rooms.

I just took a field trip of elementary school students to Washington, D.C. Seeing stern Abe Lincoln sitting in his memorial in that straight-backed chair, with those big, masculine hands started me fantasizing about crawling over his lap late, late at night so my lover could take pictures of my nude butt over his knee. After the pictures, I'd want Kyle to spank me until the echoing slaps drew the security force. Any place is a great spanking scenario!

Sarah: I've got this dream of renting a cottage in a remote Scottish glen. It's got a wee fenced garden, woods around the house, a trickling burn and hills beyond the woods. Just imagine the possibilities! A belting bent over the fence with a view to die for, indoor spankings, outdoor spankings, naked outdoor spankings at night, a brush to a wet bottom in the stream, switches galore! And best of all, just imagine lying over your partner's knee on top of a hill, getting a bare bottom spanking with miles and miles of beautiful view before your eyes and no one can hear your pathetic howling. Aaah, maybe next birthday...

Bonnie: Randy and I are fortunate to have many great spanking road trip memories. Since we've had a lot of beach and forest suggestions, I'll offer two that provide more of a desert experience. The first is La Posada de Sante Fe in Sante Fe, New Mexico. This is truly is the land of enchantment. If you've been, you know what I mean. If you haven't, Santa Fe is a genuine American original well worth the effort it takes to get there. By the way, the adobe walls seem to muffle sound quite nicely.

My second selection is the Sunriver Resort near Bend, Oregon (yes, the town's name has been a punchline for bawdy jokes throughout its existence). Even if you think you know the Beaver State (here we go again!), the beauty and solitude of the high desert might surprise you. Sunriver has a wide variety of accommodations to fit every need. During the off-season, there are some excellent bargains. Whether you choose to do your spanking indoors, outdoors, or in a lava tube (yes, we did!), opportunities abound.

Well, Kel, there you have it. That should be enough fun destinations to keep you busy for many spanko vacations to come! Thanks, everyone, for contributing your excellent ideas.

MBS Spanko Brunch #218

Hello, again! I hope spring has come to your town and you are enjoying beautiful weather. I'm sorry I was absent this past week, but real life sometimes gets in the way of my blogging (and my spankings!).

Our topic this time was suggested by our friend, Kel.

Have you a favorite spot for a spanking getaway adventure? If you would prefer not to name the specific destination, you may describe a place where you and your partner like to escape for some percussive fun. If you don't yet have a favorite locale, where would you like to go?

To add your answer to our brunch discussion, all you need to do is enter a comment below. Once everyone has spoken, I will post an edited summary. Thanks in advance for your great suggestions!

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Mar 14

This was our topic of the week:

Dagmar Rasmussen, a well-known Danish masochist, says that she enjoys the build up to a spanking and the aftermath, but that it’s a shame about the few minutes in the middle. Do you agree with the Rasmussen Principle? Why or why not?

Here are your responses.

Mark'sToy: No, I don't agree. Yes, I'm all about the anticipation, and the aftermath sets up the next episode, but without the "few minutes in the middle," it's just a mental exercise and you might as well just be daydreaming about it.

Hermione: I don't understand why Dagmar calls herself a masochist if she gets no pleasure from pain. That's a contradiction in terms.

For me, it would be like having a sandwich made of two slices of whole grain rosemary and olive bread with nothing in between. The bread is delicious, but the whole point of a sandwich is the filling. Without the pain of a spanking, there isn't any reason for what comes before or after. I'll take as much middle as I can get. That's the best part.

Tina: I kind of agree. It's just such a weird way of looking at it that it seems wrong at first. That's because, in reality, there could never be a build up and an aftermath without the middle. But in fact, if it were possible, I´d opt for it too!

Sara: I sure can relate to the statement. I also don't know why Dagmar would consider herself a masochist. I don't like pain and do not think of myself in those terms. There have been many times when I wished I could somehow have the benefits without the actual spanking! Yes, I understand that this makes no sense rationally, but on an emotional level, a hard spanking does not feel at all like what I think it will, and then later remember it as. The results are great on many levels, but going through the pain is not always so wonderful.

Our Bottoms Burn: What Hermione said. [who makes my comments so easy]

And for this self described masochist, the "pain" morphs into pleasure.

Karl Friedrich Gauss: I get the feeling that most of the comments posted so far are from the recipient's point of view. That's all well and good, but from the viewpoint of the one who would rather give than receive, the bit in the middle is definitely the main course and could not be done without!

Jean Marie: I'm a Gemini, so I hold two viewpoints.

Sometimes I'm in the mood for it, so I brat to make sure I'll get it good. All the while I'm being disciplined, I relish the experience.

Most often, though, I know that I need to be punished, but dread the actual event. It hurts! So 75% of the time this submissive agrees with the statement and looks forward with anticipation, and loves looking over her shoulder in the mirror afterward at a warmed and reddened bottom, but who hates the middle.

And we wonder why guys can't figure us out...

Dr. Ken: Dagmar would really hate my spankings, then, since they tend to last much longer than "a few minutes."

I actually know a few ladies who would probably agree with her, though. They're not masochists. They're really not "into" pain, but everything that leads up to it including earning the spanking, being caught and scolded, and time in the corner waiting to called to go over the spanker's knee. They crave the anticipation and its mental and emotional effect rather than the physical one.

I enjoy all that as well, but as a spanker, I'm definitely a "middle" man...

Daisy: Ummm, without the middle bit, there could be no aftermath, and the (lack of) middle would be a crashing disappointment to the build up, which would lead to any future promise of a spanking having less, or no, build up because there was nothing to build up FOR. Does that make sense?

I don't enjoy the pain. I don't crave the spanking itself, it's all a mind thing. I love the control being taken from me, and for that, the spanking has to actually take place!

And, I agree with the others. A true masochist would be craving the pain.

Doll: It rather depends upon the implement being used. I could do without the middle when it is a real hand as that stings so much. But with a belt, the middle is what I crave and enjoy. I just love the way it lands on my bum and the feeling of communion with the leather.

Poppy: I don't like the pain but without the severity and sternness of the middle bit, I would implode in a little ball of rage and confusion. And without the bits on either side, I would just cry and implode.

I hate being spanked. I love how I feel when I have been spanked and I love the change it brings about in me so much that sometimes I even want to be spanked.

I agree with Daisy that there is a lot about a loss of control that really makes it work for me.

Katia: I don't agree. The anticipation is what creates the mindset that I need to accept what is about to happen. Without the middle, there would be no aftermath. I would just have a bunch of emotions running amuck.

R Humphries: This question has always fascinated me, Over the years, I have discussed Dagmar’s observation with a number of spankettes and the responses have been as varied and interesting as the comments made today. Jojo says that she would not use the word ‘like’ about the painful middle section of the process, but it provides her with a total adrenalin rush as she explores her emotions

From a spanker’s point of view, of course, the middle part is the real thrill, although I do love the preparatory rituals and the often amusing conversations I have with my wife in the aftermath.

In fairness to Ms. Rasmussen, I’m not sure she ever personally described herself as a masochist. She was a respected social anthropologist at the University of Copenhagen. She was one of the first females to speak openly about her sexuality on public TV, including her submissive tendencies. I think it was more likely that it was the press that dubbed her a masochist and the spanking community who named a principle after her comments.

Perhaps Havelock Ellis sums it up best. "The essence of sadomasochism is not so much ‘pain’ as the overwhelming of one's senses - emotionally more than physically. Active sexual masochism has little to do with pain and everything to do with the search for emotional pleasure. When we understand that it is pain only, and not cruelty, that is the essential in this group of manifestations, we begin to come nearer to their explanation. The masochist desires to experience pain, but he [sic: /she] generally desires that it should be inflicted in love; the sadist desires to inflict pain, but he [sic: /she] desires that it should be felt as love..." --Havelock Ellis

Although I must confess that during three and a half decades of spanking adventures, I have never thought of myself as a ‘sadist’ and I’m sure that Jojo doesn’t define herself as a ‘masochist’ any more than she considers herself to be a submissive . It's interesting stuff.

Bonnie: As I've said before, I don't like labels because they carry so much baggage. Right or wrong, S/M says freak to most of the population. So fitting or not, I avoid those words.

As for the question at hand, I'm solidly with the dissenters. The spanking itself is where the cerebral world of fantasies and desires become manifest in the down and dirty physical here and now. The searing pain of a wooden hairbrush crashing into undulating flesh makes it all real. The crisp report, the anticipation of the next blow, the involuntary intake of air, the sudden sensation of wanting to flee, and the rising determination to demonstrate my submission are all important parts of the complete experience. I would never want to skip any aspect even once.

I like to have my bottom spanked and I want it to hurt enough to leave memories I can cherish later. With that said, there are definitely times when Randy spanks harder and/or faster than I would choose. But working though those moments is an important part of the process. When I remain in place and accept his entire gift, I prove my submission, if only to myself. Once I leave the moment, that whole ball of emotions transforms into pure lust.

Yes, I'll take the whole enchilada!

Red: No, I don't agree with the Rasmussen principle. I need those few moments in between as much as I hate the actual seconds of pain.

Thanks, everyone, for sharing your insights. I hope you'll join us again next weekend!

MBS Spanko Brunch #217

It's time again for another installment in our continuing series of discussions about spanking and related issues. This week's question was submitted by our friend RH from The Woody Back to School Unit.

Dagmar Rasmussen, a well-known Danish masochist, says that she enjoys the build up to a spanking and the aftermath, but that it’s a shame about the few minutes in the middle. Do you agree with the Rasmussen Principle? Why or why not?

To join in our conversation, all that is required is a comment entered below. You can even remain anonymous if that is more comfortable. But please do join us because we would like to hear your perspective.

In with the New: Hoping for Spring Edition

Today, for your reading enjoyment, we present a sweet sixteen collection of new spanking-oriented blogs. I invite you to visit these new members of our community and welcome them with your supportive comments.

Bryanna Cox's Spanking Blog Chelsea's Journal Corner Time Stories Dublin Paolo Spanking Dyke Spank Growing Through Submission Irelynn vs. the World Loved and Led Naughty Catherine Peter Martin's Blog Spanking Pixie's Picture Archive Spanking Starlets Spanksalot The Adventures of Rusty Nale The Marine's Wife Traditional Romance Stories

Several of these blogs are published by old friends in new places. Others are first time bloggers. Either way, we wish you great success and lasting fulfillment!

Implement Stories: Hermione

The first installment of Implement Stories for 2010 features our good friend, Hermione.

Our local thrift shop is a treasure trove of spanking possibilities. These previously-loved paddles may once have held many fond memories of a summer vacation. Who knows what sights they have seen, and what fun they have been part of? They came without an accompanying projectile, so I assume their intended target was something other than a little white ball. Because they are a matched pair, there are so many possibilities. If one paddle is accidentally misplaced or hidden, the other one will be ready for action. If one breaks or wears out, we have a spare. And the thought of being spanked with two paddles at the same time leaves me quite breathless.

It does look as if the man is chasing the woman with paddle in hand, doesn't it?

Recap: MBS Sunday Brunch for Mar 7

Our topic this week was things we can do to promote and encourage new spanking bloggers. Here are your thoughts.

Poppy: You do so much to encourage and promote new bloggers. You should tell us!

When I was brand (ahem) spanking new blogger you said hello and put a link up on your site. I had been reading you for ages. The fact that you not only acknowledged me, but linked to me, made me blush and feel that I must have something to say because look where I found myself.

So I will follow your lead. I must put more links up on my little space. Mine is a mini-space and I don't think I can promote anyone as I am not yet well known enough. But maybe that is not the point.

Oh, I am all in knots now.

From - Confused of an English Shire

Sara: This is something I have been thinking about lately. I agree with what Poppy said. Me too, as you know. You helped to get me started and have supported so many of us in this community. I wonder if we could better follow your lead by not only going out of our way to read and comment on new blogs, but also to post and link to your "In With The New" posts. That might further spread the word.

Richard Windsor: One suggestion that I have, because I am as guilty as anyone for not doing it, is for those of us who have established blogs to make the rounds of the newer blogs and leave them some comments. It's kind of like encouraging them by letting them know that we are reading them. I guess it would be like “Love our Lurkers,” but in reverse. We could have people comment on someone else's blog :-)

Todd and Suzy: Fellow bloggers can link to new blogs and/or mention them in a post. We know when we were first starting out that meant a lot to us. The wink we got from MBS was a big boost, not only because it increased our hits, but it also made us feel like a part of the community. It was a big deal!

And then readers can leave comments. When you're starting a blog it's very natural to wonder, “Does anyone read this? Does anyone care?” Comments answer both of those questions in an encouraging way.

Other ideas include sending an e-mail, "following" a blog, linking to or mentioning a specific post, voting in a poll (if they have them). Basically, it helps to participate and show that the blogger's effort is appreciated.

We all benefit from new blogs, so we all benefit when they're encouraged.

Hermione: We can do a lot to encourage new bloggers:

• Make return visits - New bloggers get a lot of traffic on the day when In with the New introduces them. Go back a few times over the next week or two to see what else our new friends have to say.


• Leave a comment - Each time you drop in, say a few words. It really doesn't matter what you say, although something friendly and encouraging is always nice.


• Add to your blogroll - If you like the blog, add it to your blogroll. This will encourage your regular readers to go there too.


• Post about the blogger - If you have reason to, mention a new blogger in a post, and include the link to that blog.

New bloggers can encourage readers in a few ways too:

• Reply to comments - Always write a comment in response to the comments you receive. It doesn't have to be one for one; a single short comment might cover it, or a comment with one line for each commenter is always nice.


• Post regularly - You don't have to write long or complex posts. Simple and straightforward works well, and speaking from your heart will appeal to your readers. Or if you have a picture blog, post frequently, even if it's only one picture at a time. In either case, you want to encourage your readers to come back.


• Comment on other blogs - If you visit other blogs and leave comments, chances are those bloggers will return the favour and visit yours.

R Humphries: If you find a new site that really piques your interest or that you think will be of particular interest to your readers, add it to your blogroll and maybe leave them a comment. But why not feature them in the body of your post? You can say why you like them and provide a brief synopsis of the content. It only takes but a minute and a few words, but those few words will go a helluva long way to make a new blogger's day.

Naomi: More comments!

Mark: I would suggest a FAQ or howto on setting up and posting on a blog while maintaining your anonymity. Good blogs go away all the time (thinking of you, Mike) because the veil was busted. I had to delete my blog and change my nom de plume because I got worried that I had posted "too much" about myself. I've learned a lot since then, but this isn't the kind of thing you want to learn by trial and error.

It wouldn't be a “kink” if we felt free to talk about it openly.

Curtis: I hope no one takes what I'm going to say in the wrong spirit. I like this blog a lot, as I do a number of others. But the universe of spanking-related blogs is so huge that it's difficult to sort through the ones you want to read. I know there are many who feel the need to express themselves about their world, their desires, their fulfillments, feelings and observations. And I know that some blogs resonate with some people and others with others.

I'm grateful that Bonnie puts up her "In with the New" so those of us who are readers and sometimes commenters can check them out. And I'm very grateful for Richard's Spanking Universe contribution that allows us to see what updates we would like to look at. But while I would encourage any who want to enter the field to do so and hope that they will be welcomed, one could spend 24-hour days reading and commenting on all of the spanking-related blogs. Not only should people be encouraged to do what they feel they want to do, but there also needs to be a way of sorting them out so people don't have a bookmark list that's a mile long.

Prefectdt: I find myself more inclined to listen to Poppy, R Humphries and Naomi regarding how best to help out new bloggers because they all have blogs that are six months old or less.

Many of us (I include myself in this) started in the spank blogging world two or more years ago. Since then, the rules of the game have changed out of all recognition. What helped us get started and encouraged us to keep blogging at that time is possibly very different from the elements that would help a new blog get started and keep going now.

How can we help new bloggers now? I have to admit that I do not really know because it is not the same now as when I started my blog. But I am willing to learn.

What I would like to see is successful bloggers, with blogs of less than six months of age, taking a good look at their stats and motivations and correlate them with outside influences. They can then inform the more long term bloggers of the things that helped them. More established bloggers would then have a better idea of how things are working now and what helps new blogs get going and keep going in this day and age. If we want to help new blogs, we need to know what works for new blogs now, not several years ago.

Florida Dom: To start with, if somebody leaves a comment on your blog and you don't recognize them, check out their blog. And leave them a comment, especially if they're newcomers.

Whenever you come across a new blog or if Bonnie links to them, stop by and leave a comment and encourage them.

I know this may sound obvious, but I just wanted to repeat it.

Daisychain: The best way to encourage new bloggers is to leave short, but encouraging comments on their blog. Tips are handy too, especially if they are tips about how not to fall into a particular trap such as privacy, etc.

I received loads of encouragement at first, which helped to inspire me and made sure that I continued. There is nothing worse than writing a blog and having no one comment. Davey has given up writing for now. He was discouraged because he only had a few readers. It's a shame because there are so few "couple" bloggers, and I like to get the male and female perspective on each story.

Ronnie: You've helped a lot of bloggers get started and have been very supportive. If it wasn't for you, some of us wouldn't be around. Thank you.

There a lot of very good suggestions and I really can't add any new ideas.

I agree about adding new bloggers you like to your own blogroll, leaving a friendly greeting, and always replying to a comment you've received.

Mija: Like everyone says, comments are a help, especially early on. I think it also helps to remind new bloggers to put some sort of stat counter on their blog so they can see how and what their traffic is and where it's coming from.

Only about one visitor in every 200-500 on my blog leaves a comment. Without a stat counter, I might assume I only had 20 or so readers!

Finally, for those who are starting blogs, focus on being readable. Make sure to look at your blog on different computers and browsers and pay attention to colors. I know I'm way more likely to read a blog if it's written in black text on a white or light background. Black background with light text makes for painful reading.

Karl Friedrich Gauss: As so many have said before, posting comments and taking an interest in the work of new bloggers is really crucial.

If you like how or what they write, make sure they're in no doubt that at least someone out there appreciates their effort!

R Humphries: I don't often comment more than once, but I wanted to add a note on Mija's comment. According to the Woody Geek Squad, browsers all read code differently. What looks nice on your computer might not be the same on those of your visitors. Apparently, the best check sequence is:

1. Mozilla Firefox
2. IE6 (even though its not much used)
3. Opera
4. Chrome
5. Safari
6. IE7
7. IE8

You should also check the difference between viewing in 1024 and 1280 screen modes. I work on a laptop at 1280 and everything looks fine, but on a desktop at 1024, my page looks awful.

With so many alternatives, if your page is hard to read or not appealing to visitors, they will just move on.

Bonnie: Thanks to those who recognized my efforts in this area. However, if I thought I knew the answer I would not have asked.

I wrote several articles about blogging several years ago and linked to them from each In with the New post. With the passage of time and the advance of technology, these posts became dated and I stopped linking them. Based upon your feedback, I think it might be helpful to update those articles and repost them. Consider it added to my blog projects list.

I believe that new bloggers bring with them novel perspectives and innovative approaches. These are precisely what it will take to expand our readership. As a rising tide lifts all boats, a growing audience benefits all blogs. Every reader we send to our new colleagues is an investment in the future of our community.

Thank you to everyone who registered their thoughts on this important subject. For those who didn't, next week, I promise we'll talk about spanking!

MBS Spanko Brunch #216

Welcome back to our weekly gathering. This brunch is a forum to discuss topics of interest within our community. Today, I seek your advice on a question that is close to my heart.

What can we do to promote and encourage new bloggers?

I would love to hear your suggestions. Just enter a comment below and when we're finished, I will post an edited summary of our conversation. Thanks in advance for sharing your insights!

Poll: Spanking on Television

Which of the following TV spankings would you most like to watch? A classic movie like McLintock or Blue Hawaii A newer film like Secretary A classic sitcom spanking like I Love Lucy A spanking episode in a contemporary sitcom A miniseries about a couple who spices up their love life with spankings An adult spanking documentary on public TV A gameshow featuring spanking A star-studded pay-per-view spanko spectacular A soap opera with spanking The spanko Olympic games An amateur public access spanking show A popular commercial spanking film A spanking-themed reality show A beauty pagent with a spanking competition America's Next Spanking Model Why would I want to watch spanking on TV? Current Results

The Return of Implement Stories

In past years, I invited MBS readers to share stories and photographs of their favorite spanking implements. Quite a few readers participated and the event was great fun.

With your assistance, I would like to revive the Implement Stories tradition for 2010. I invite you to e-mail me a photograph (or photographs) of your favorite or most memorable spanking implements. I can accept either the picture itself as an attachment or a link to it elsewhere. If you would like to include a short history or memorable adventure, that would be splendid as well. I will then display the toys here on MBS.

Thank you, in advance, for your contributions!

Potpourri at 1200

Hey everybody! There's been a lot going on here at the blog and I thought it might be nice to catch up.

As you've probably guessed, you're reading post #1200 on MBS. That's a dozen hundred (or a hundred dozen). In any case, it's hard to believe we've lasted so long. Thanks to all who read, and especially to those readers who comment. Every blogger loves your comments. Even if it's just one sentence, your words provide treasured acknowledgment and affirmation.

I just published an In with the New post a couple of weeks ago. Already, I've accumulated eight more new blogs to share. Either adult spanking is more popular than ever or people who spank are discovering blogging at an amazing rate. Either way, our community is teeming with excellent blogs. The only downside to this embarrassment of riches is that some promising new bloggers never manage to find a stable core readership. I'm thinking about ways to get them some positive exposure before frustration sets in.

The mailbag feature always seems to have the effect of generating more mail. That's great. Keep those e-mails coming! If I haven't answered you yet, please bear with me. I will get to it soon.

I hope you voted in our recent reader poll. I thought the results were very interesting.

• Just over 60% of voters are male. That matches both previous polls and MBS's web demographics


• More than half of all readers are either male spankers or female spankees


• Overall, spankees outnumber spankers by a considerable margin


• The proportion of male spankees and switches (35% of all respondents) is higher than I anticipated


• Conversely, the representation of female spankers (2%) is lower than I expected

A reader asked me how I keep coming up with such wonderfully bizarre phrases for Keyword Chaos. The short answer is that I don't. Someone somewhere typed those words into a search engine for reasons that shall forever remain a mystery. All we can do is laugh and point.

I've received several excellent brunch topic suggestions recently. You'll be seeing them appear in the coming weeks. I'm always open to new ideas, so if there is a (bottom) burning question that you would like to see our brunch bunch answer, please send it to me.

I've been trying to audio record more of our spankings lately. Hopefully, we will capture something worth sharing.

I'm glad everyone liked the Simon and Garfunkel song parody. I find myself a bit conflicted when taking on a song of that magnitude. In one way, it's so historically meaningful that changing it, even in the name of fun, feels like painting over a masterpiece. On the other hand, if one parodies a song that is not well known, the result will surely be a head-scratcher.

The song itself was a challenge. Paul Simon's folk roots are clearly apparent in the lyrics. He was (and is) much more concerned with message than meter. The same line in different verses could have three beats, four beats, or even five beats. I preserved all of those quirks. I also retained a few of the original words where I could. I wouldn't presume to rhyme forming with warning, but he did and I kept it.

On a sad note, we bid farewell last week to our friend and colleague, Alex Birch. I didn't know him as well as some bloggers did, but we did have the opportunity to exchange e-mails a few times. Bon voyage and fare thee well, old friend.

It's interesting to note that my recent upsurge in blogging activity has been accompanied by an increase in spanking at our house. Coincidence? I doubt it. Anyhow, I have some more fun features in the queue including a return of an old favorite. Thanks again and please stay tuned...